View Full Version : Finally got a diagnosis as to why my wife can't play at all

03-28-2011, 05:07 PM
After trying everything to teach her, we finally went to the eye doctor.

She had an eye test. The doctor asked her to read the third line of the eye chart and she said she couldn't see it.

He asked her to read the second line ... same thing, she couldn't see it.

He asked her if she could see that big letter on the top line, and she said she still couldn't see it.

The doctor got so frustrated he unbuckled his pants and dropped them to his ankles and asked her if she could see that.

She said, "Yes, perfectly."

He said, well there's your answer, you're cockeyed. :killingme:

03-28-2011, 05:43 PM
Damn and I thought it was her giant boobs getting in the way of her stroke!:p

03-28-2011, 05:49 PM
A guy wakes up one morning and while he's shaving he notices a lump on his forehead. He doesn't think much of it until a few days later when he realizes that it's getting bigger. So, he takes a trip to the doctor. The doctor runs some tests and comes back and says "Mr. Williams, I'm not really sure how to tell you this......you have a penis growing out of your forehead and you're going to go blind." "Blind? Why the hell would I go blind?" "Well, the balls will be hanging over your eyes."

Thank you, I'm here all week.

Blue Hog ridr
03-28-2011, 06:00 PM
I went to the Dr. today too. I haven't been feeling well for a while now.
After the check up, the Dr, said,"well, it looks like you only have one month to live".
I said "thats crazy, I want a second opinion".
He said, "OK, you're ugly too".

The Dster
03-28-2011, 06:26 PM
I had my gal fetching me a beer from the fridge, when she came back I told her.. You also need to take the trash out, she said .. Where you want to go??

03-28-2011, 06:41 PM
A lady goes to the doctor and complains that her husband is losing interest in sex.

The doctor gives her a pill, but warns her it is still experimental and tells her to slip it into his mashed potatoes at dinner.

So, that night at dinner, she does. About a week later she's back at the doctor's office.

She says, "Doc, the pill worked great! I put it in the potatoes like you suggested. It wasn't five minutes and he jumps up, rakes all the food and dishes off the table, grabs me, rips all my clothes off and ravishes me right then and there on the table."

The doctor says, "I'm sorry, we didn't realize the pill was that strong. The foundation will be glad to pay for any damages."

"Naah..." she says, "that's okay. We wouldn't go back to that restaurant anyway."

03-28-2011, 07:33 PM
last night i had a dream i was a muffler, when I woke up i was exausted

03-28-2011, 08:10 PM
An irishman is late for a match and can't find a parking spot. He stops in the road and says" Jesus, if you get me a parkin spot i'll stop me swearin, me drinkin, and me whorin about." Just then a spot opens right in front of him."Never mind Lord," he says. "I just found one."