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Boro Nut
02-10-2006, 11:00 AM
As my league opponents seem to get younger and younger every year I've become increasingly uneasy with my own appearance, and it's starting to really affect my performance. I've spent a fortune on fad diets, facial scrubs and exotic lotions, but no matter what I try my skin stays soft and clear. Can I buy acne?

Boro Nut

thoffen
02-10-2006, 11:02 AM
You can buy mine for the low, low price of free.

raemondo
02-10-2006, 11:03 AM
As my league opponents seem to get younger and younger every year I've become increasingly uneasy with my own appearance, and it's starting to really affect my performance. I've spent a fortune on fad diets, facial scrubs and exotic lotions, but no matter what I try my skin stays soft and clear. Can I buy acne?

Boro Nut


Try smearing some chicken tenders on your face.....lol

supergreenman
02-10-2006, 12:01 PM
try a red tipped felt pen

Rboehme
02-10-2006, 12:04 PM
Steroids! Not only will it give you acne, but you will have the worst temper in your league.

straybullet
02-10-2006, 12:11 PM
Try a belt sander.

Gregg
02-10-2006, 12:13 PM
This sounds like a "Back in my day..." moment.

jnav447
02-10-2006, 12:41 PM
You don't need acne; just wear your pants halfway down your keester with UUUUUUUUGLY boxers, Oakland Raiders cap backwards and 3 or 4 hairs protruding from your upper lip or chin (or both!) and u be mackdaddy stylin.

Perk
02-10-2006, 12:46 PM
Steroids! Not only will it give you acne, but you will have the worst temper in your league.

and the smallest "_ _ _ _ _" on the team! :)

henho
02-10-2006, 12:58 PM
Check Trudeau's book....I'm sure he'll recommend something like a tylenol or a flintstone's vitamin that will make you break out like the surface of the moon.

BillYards
02-10-2006, 01:43 PM
This is the funnies thread I have ever read on the forum.

Please rent "Animal House" for Bluto's lesson on how to BE a zit... try that and see if it helps.

pharaoh68
02-10-2006, 01:57 PM
Here's what I do.

1) I eat a lot of really crappy fast food. Things that are filled with oil and grease! Then I get fat. Not like obese fat. Just 'disgusting pot belly that makes me look like I'm 7 months pregnant' fat, and believe me! That's even less appealing.
2) Now that I'm fat, I stop wearing belts and I let the elastic pop on my boxers. This equals plummers crack on every shot.
3) Now, remember all that grease and oil? Don't shower. See how that stuff affects your pores. I promise you, it'll lead to acne and bacne in no time. You won't be able to look in the mirror without wanting to liken parts of your face to constellations!
4) Now, be sure to pop every zit before its ready to burst. This way, it'll scar and leave terrible little pock marks all over.
5) Wear a hat all the time! Sideways too!

Bonus:
6) Drink beers too. Lots of 'em. And when they start to get old, try whiskey.
7) Smoke a lot too. And I mean, a lot. Forget two packs of your silly light cigs a day. I mean three packs of Camel unfiltereds or Lucky Strikes!

I promise you; you follow steps one through five and you will look like a angst-ridden, 'angry at the world' adolescent in no time flat!
Now, throw in steps six and seven (plus the residual affects of one through five) and by the time you hit forty, you'll look like your seventy (fat, bald, and skin like leather)! By the time you forty-five, you look like your ninety (fat, bald, skin like leather, and ginblossoms)!!! By the time you hit fifty, you'll be dead!!! Trust me! I'm well on my way! ;)

pharaoh68
02-10-2006, 01:58 PM
Nothing to say here. This was just so that my post counter read '400'. Yay!