Fargorate: The Truth
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Fargorate: The Truth - 11-01-2019, 03:06 PM

Few people know that Fargo is the oldest city in the americas. Long before the people who would become known as “native Americans” waltzed onto the land there was a civilization of people from modern day Croatia. They were a seafaring people and many were stranded here after a shipwreck. Fast forward several centuries. New people show up, war follows as always. The unnamed Croatian people had all fallen back to their main city of Fargo. As the enemy closed in all around them they started a dark ceremony. Details are shadowy but from what we can tell they committed mass suicide...or so it seemed. The truth is, they transformed all together into the conscious entity known as Fargo, becoming a part of the land. The world’s only truly living city.

We can’t be sure what kind of revenge they took on people throughout the years but what is known is that due to the exceptional play of one “Rory Hendrickson” the Fargo entity took an interest in pool. We can only guess as to what they can see and hear, and how far their senses reach, but they came to realize after a while that there was no standardized rating for pool player’s skill.

This annoyed Fargo greatly and so a project was started, with the help of Stephen Hawking, to create an AI that would be responsible for tracking the players. We’re unsure at this time if one “Mike Page” is a robot, magical projection, or figurehead willing or unwilling but one thing is sure. Fargorate is growing in accuracy and ambition. Is it a benign entity? Or insidious... keep an eye out people.
  
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11-01-2019, 03:44 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by JazzyJeff87 View Post
Few people know that Fargo is the oldest city in the americas. Long before the people who would become known as “native Americans” waltzed onto the land there was a civilization of people from modern day Croatia. They were a seafaring people and many were stranded here after a shipwreck. Fast forward several centuries. New people show up, war follows as always. The unnamed Croatian people had all fallen back to their main city of Fargo. As the enemy closed in all around them they started a dark ceremony. Details are shadowy but from what we can tell they committed mass suicide...or so it seemed. The truth is, they transformed all together into the conscious entity known as Fargo, becoming a part of the land. The world’s only truly living city.

We can’t be sure what kind of revenge they took on people throughout the years but what is known is that due to the exceptional play of one “Rory Hendrickson” the Fargo entity took an interest in pool. We can only guess as to what they can see and hear, and how far their senses reach, but they came to realize after a while that there was no standardized rating for pool player’s skill.

This annoyed Fargo greatly and so a project was started, with the help of Stephen Hawking, to create an AI that would be responsible for tracking the players. We’re unsure at this time if one “Mike Page” is a robot, magical projection, or figurehead willing or unwilling but one thing is sure. Fargorate is growing in accuracy and ambition. Is it a benign entity? Or insidious... keep an eye out people.
That's great!

I expected this to end with "...And Epstein didn't kill himself."

As an aside, I think a decent AI could pass the Turing test now. Not because AI is good but because the average communication skills of people are so terrible. So maybe Mike Page IS an AI.


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11-03-2019, 09:26 AM

Lol hey how about that.

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11-14-2019, 06:00 PM

....lol...

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11-25-2019, 08:25 PM

Does anyone in here remember “Creeper”

Got that creeper.
  
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12-23-2019, 07:23 PM

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Does anyone in here remember “Creeper”

Got that creeper.
Yeah I remember that stuff...what a scam. Botanicals just don’t work that way.

How about that new beanie from 7-11? Sometimes you just find a freakin nugget O’ gold when and where you least expect it. And in odd forms not even remotely resembling the element gold. My last beanie, A Dr. Mcguillicuddy in gray, was a bit thin but I liked it so much I wore it for 3 winters.

As it got more and more threadbare I had a bad feeling in the back of the brain that I’d wear a hole in it before I ever found a decent replacement but then one morning I stopped into 7-11 for a cold mocha Frappuccino, something I don’t do often since they’re like tree fity...but if I’m super hungry and have that weird extra tired feeling where it almost feels wet inside my ears then I’ll stop and grab one, so I just happened to be in the 7-11 while my gray hat was MIA which forced me to consider the hat rack and There It Was. A bit thicker yarn (or whatever it is) in a thicker pattern than I usually prefer but super comfy. All black, with a 1 3/4” white stripe about an inch from the bottom wrapping all the way around.

Not only all that good stuff, but it has a perfect fleece liner around the inside headband area. These can be overdone or just cheaply and it ruins the hat but not this one friends. Oh no. This beanie is absolutely perfect except for the rather heavy seam, but I’ve found if I position the seam behind my ear it’s not really visible or feelable.

I’m still keeping my gray around though because as the demented and ever hateful summer starts to wake we will have the transitional season of spring with chilly days requiring cover to my hairless dome, but not needing the warm thickness of the new black.

Oh yeah and it’s definitely not a “fold the bottom up” type. Not that those are inherently bad they just don’t usually last long in my winter wardrobe.
  
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12-29-2019, 02:58 AM

Fun to see this old stuff, thanks for posting it!


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01-23-2020, 09:59 AM

So when I was a young man I got kicked out of the house for being a nefarious cretin, certain to bring trouble to all around me.

This caused me considerable grief as I had a voracious appetite, but no job and no cash flow saved up. My paw had confiscated and locked up my little .22 pistol without my knowledge, prior to kicking me out. So I’ve got no way to make money or hunt properly.

I bounced around to some friends houses and ate what I could, pulled some tricks at 711 to get full for about $1 but I couldn’t always get there. After weeks of being malnourished it starts to compound. My hunger was insane and I started eyeballing anything non-human with intent.

while my friends were in school I’d just wander around trying to make myself feel good in one way or another. One afternoon I noticed a whole gang of squirrels lived in this little island of woods in my buddy’s neighborhood. I knew they were made of meat, and I liked eating meat, so I came up with a plan.

Throwing my pocket knife was doomed from the get but it gave me an idea. There was an empty lot filled with nice, fist sized stones. I gathered a bunch and made my way to the hunting grounds. It took a while, but eventually I got my aim down and became the bane of these squirrels existence.

I’d catch one out in the open, hold my knife in my off hand, beam the little tree rat with a stone and start sprinting towards the tree as soon as the rock flew. This is where the artistry and savagery met. You had to be quick and sure with the knife because the squirrels wouldn’t be dazed for more than a second after hitting the ground (usually...unless you got a head shot or broke ribs and stuff) so as I’m running I’m watching to see if I hit it and trying to gauge where it will land so I can jump/stab the S out of it. Reading this takes longer than the whole process in real life. It was a quick thing.

I have to admit, it was a bit over the top and dramatic..probably dangerous..for a little bit of squirrel but the satisfaction of cavemanning it like that in the middle of a suburban neighborhood was worth it. Especially considering I got some freakin meat out of the whole thing. And it taught me to enjoy gnawing on the parts of animals I’d usually just throw away. Waste not

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02-06-2020, 07:21 AM

Space is crazy right? What if we’re just an infected cell in the “blood stream” of some unfathomable creature? As far down as we can see there are things smaller and smaller that can’t even fathom us. The human body is an organism. A million different things live in and on us, stuff in our gut, on our skin etc etc. maybe we are gods to them
  
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02-07-2020, 01:10 PM

Is this a real story or a pool hall story?
  
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02-14-2020, 06:57 PM

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Is this a real story or a pool hall story?
Which one? They’re all real true life stories and theories...with the possible exception of maybe the first one...possibly
  
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02-18-2020, 08:34 AM

Oh man I’m sitting in the MVA right now. I had this plan of getting here before they opened so as I could be standing by the door and cut down my wait time drastically, pero that didn’t happen. I freakin fell back asleep somehow. You know the feeling. You wake up in the morning and actually feel well rested and good, and it’s bright outside, and you’re like aww fuuuug. Well that was me this morning.

So now I’m all up in this place and 98% of the people in here are not pleasant to look upon. I’m trying to find a girlfriend right but how am I gonna do that with all these knuckle draggers and ladies with their hair sweat plastered to the side of their face? I guess I’ve got more opportunities here than at the social security office. I’ve only been in that place once that I can remember. Not fun sexually.
  
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02-18-2020, 10:59 AM

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Originally Posted by JazzyJeff87 View Post
Oh man I’m sitting in the MVA right now. I had this plan of getting here before they opened so as I could be standing by the door and cut down my wait time drastically, pero that didn’t happen. I freakin fell back asleep somehow. You know the feeling. You wake up in the morning and actually feel well rested and good, and it’s bright outside, and you’re like aww fuuuug. Well that was me this morning.

So now I’m all up in this place and 98% of the people in here are not pleasant to look upon. I’m trying to find a girlfriend right but how am I gonna do that with all these knuckle draggers and ladies with their hair sweat plastered to the side of their face? I guess I’ve got more opportunities here than at the social security office. I’ve only been in that place once that I can remember. Not fun sexually.


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02-18-2020, 05:05 PM

Haha no I had to go FULL full service. Glen Burnie.

The letter they sent said I needed to go to a full service spot, I checked and Annapolis fit the bill and is a relatively peaceful branch. Sure enough I wasted 30+ minutes there to find out I had to go to the Main Branch to solve my particular problems. I spent a decent chunk of my young adulthood in and around west Baltimore, and it’s a place/mindset/offshoot of human civilization that I try to avoid now...no offense to anyone from there of course ��

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03-04-2020, 06:53 AM

So another one of my friends died this past Saturday. I’d need all my fingers and toes to count the ones I’ve seen go. I’m 32 but it’s like I’m 80. Out of my close friends there are now 2 left. One is paralyzed from the waist down, off and on coke/heroin enthusiast. The other is on a full blown habit. I hear from him every 6 mo to a year when he gets out of jail or someone else dies. He called me Monday to make plans to ride with me to the funeral, then hits me up yesterday to ask if I’ll swoop through Baltimore on the way to get some dope and coke. Speedballing to the overdose funeral of our friend. The world is insane because we like it this way.
  
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