(FAQ) Got any pool jokes?
- Thread starter allanpsand
- Start date
A horse walks in to my local pool room, I beg your pardon, sports bar and grill. and sits down at the bar.
The bartender comes over and says, "Hey, buddy, why the long face?" :grin:
The bartender comes over and says, "Hey, buddy, why the long face?" :grin:
An average snooker player, an average 3-C player and an average pool player walked into a bar. All three discussed how they can succeed in their respective cue sports.
The snooker player says, "As long as you have sound fundamentals, you will always pot a ball in the pocket."
The 3-C player asks, "What's a pocket?" Then the pool players asks:
"What's fundamentals?"
The snooker player says, "As long as you have sound fundamentals, you will always pot a ball in the pocket."
The 3-C player asks, "What's a pocket?" Then the pool players asks:
"What's fundamentals?"
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POOL,
You play two games in the morning,
You play two games at night.
You play two games in the afternoon,
It makes you feel alright.
You play two games in times of peace,
Two at times of war.
You play two games before you play two games,
Then you play two more.
You play two games in the morning,
You play two games at night.
You play two games in the afternoon,
It makes you feel alright.
You play two games in times of peace,
Two at times of war.
You play two games before you play two games,
Then you play two more.
lock em up
Lock em up Charlie never played without the dead nuts. One day old man Jones
who cleaned up the pool room had a heart attack and fell over dead. All the players
drew straws to see who would break the news to his wife. Lockemup lost. He knocks
on Jones door and a lady opens it. "Widow Jones ?", No I'am Mrs Jones", she says.
"Well you can bust me"
jack
Lock em up Charlie never played without the dead nuts. One day old man Jones
who cleaned up the pool room had a heart attack and fell over dead. All the players
drew straws to see who would break the news to his wife. Lockemup lost. He knocks
on Jones door and a lady opens it. "Widow Jones ?", No I'am Mrs Jones", she says.
"Well you can bust me"
jack
Are you sure this wasn't David Howard?
Big John is Coming
A hustler is playing pool in a rough old town in the Wild West. The hustler asks the bartender about local action. The bartender tells him " there's plenty of good action, but if you ever hear that Big John is coming to town, drop everything and run for the hills!! He's the meanest, biggest, nastiest outlaw and pool hustler who's ever lived!!"
A few weeks pass uneventfully. But one afternoon, a local cowhand comes running through town yelling, "Big John is coming to town, run for your lives!"
The bar clears out in a hurry but the hustler has to finish his game. he starts to leave but quickly stops. A man is out front tying up the brahma bull he rode in on. He sees the huge man's silhouette in the doorway. He's at least 7 feet tall, thick and muscular, growling as he walks. He barges though the door, stomps up to the bar and demands, "I want a beer NOW!!" He pounds his heavy fist on the bar, splitting it in half. The bartender nervously hands the big man a beer, hands shaking. He takes the beer, rips the top of the bottle off with his teeth, and downs the beer in one gulp. He grabs the hustler's cue, makes a thunderous break, and runs three racks of nine ball, growling the entire time.
As the hustler cowers behind the bar, the big man walks over to the hustler and stares him cold in the eye. The hustler meekly asks him "Can I buy you a beer mister?"
The big man hands him back his cue and says "No, I have to leave. Didn't you hear Big John is coming to town?"
A hustler is playing pool in a rough old town in the Wild West. The hustler asks the bartender about local action. The bartender tells him " there's plenty of good action, but if you ever hear that Big John is coming to town, drop everything and run for the hills!! He's the meanest, biggest, nastiest outlaw and pool hustler who's ever lived!!"
A few weeks pass uneventfully. But one afternoon, a local cowhand comes running through town yelling, "Big John is coming to town, run for your lives!"
The bar clears out in a hurry but the hustler has to finish his game. he starts to leave but quickly stops. A man is out front tying up the brahma bull he rode in on. He sees the huge man's silhouette in the doorway. He's at least 7 feet tall, thick and muscular, growling as he walks. He barges though the door, stomps up to the bar and demands, "I want a beer NOW!!" He pounds his heavy fist on the bar, splitting it in half. The bartender nervously hands the big man a beer, hands shaking. He takes the beer, rips the top of the bottle off with his teeth, and downs the beer in one gulp. He grabs the hustler's cue, makes a thunderous break, and runs three racks of nine ball, growling the entire time.
As the hustler cowers behind the bar, the big man walks over to the hustler and stares him cold in the eye. The hustler meekly asks him "Can I buy you a beer mister?"
The big man hands him back his cue and says "No, I have to leave. Didn't you hear Big John is coming to town?"
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That was great Tate.
Old guy, 75ish at the time, that used to play pretty decent walks into my local room. He asked if any women have been in looking for him. I said, "I dont think so." he said, "Good, theyd probably be carrying a gun if that helps." wasnt even that funny but i think shot pepsi through my nose about 80mph. What a character.
I could post a video of me playing. That's pretty funny.
What do you call a pool player with no wife or girlfriend? .........homeless:thumbup:
Three guys (Mr. Past, Mr. Present, and Mr. Future) were in a pool hall playing a $10,000 ring game. It was tense.