Go Back   AzBilliards.com > Main Category > Non Pool Related
Reload this Page The two most important events in all of history were the invention of beer and the in
Reply
 
Share Thread Tools Rate Thread
The two most important events in all of history were the invention of beer and the in
Old
  (#1)
tableroll
AzB Silver Member
tableroll has a reputation beyond reputetableroll has a reputation beyond reputetableroll has a reputation beyond reputetableroll has a reputation beyond reputetableroll has a reputation beyond reputetableroll has a reputation beyond reputetableroll has a reputation beyond reputetableroll has a reputation beyond reputetableroll has a reputation beyond reputetableroll has a reputation beyond reputetableroll has a reputation beyond repute
 
Status: Offline
Posts: 1,131
vCash: 500
iTrader: 0 / 0%
Join Date: Sep 2012
   
The two most important events in all of history were the invention of beer and the in - 12-06-2019, 07:51 AM

Neither the glass bottle nor aluminum can were invented yet, so while our early humans were sitting around waiting for them to be invented, they just stayed close to the brewery. That's how villages were formed.

The wheel was invented to get man to the beer and vice versa. These two were the foundation of modern civilization and together were the catalyst for the splitting of humanity into two distinct subgroups:

1. Liberals.
2. Conservatives.

Some men spent their days tracking and killing animals to BBQ at night while they were drinking beer. This was the beginning of what is known as the Conservative movement.

Other men who were less skilled at hunting, called "vegetarians", which was an early human word meaning "bad hunter", learned to live off the Conservatives by showing up for the nightly BBQ's and doing the sewing, fetching, and hairdressing. This was the beginning of the liberal movement.

Some of these liberal men “evolved” into women. Others became known as girlie-men. Some noteworthy liberal achievements include the domestication of cats, the invention of group therapy, group hugs, and the concept of democratic voting to decide how to divide the meat and beer that Conservatives provided.

Over the years Conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest, most powerful land animal on earth, the elephant. Liberals are symbolized by the jackass for obvious reasons.

Modern Liberals like special flavored beer (with lime added), but most prefer white wine spritzers or imported bottled water. They eat raw fish but like their beef well done. Sushi, tofu, and French food are standard liberal fare. Another interesting evolutionary side note: many liberal women have higher testosterone levels than their men.

Most college professors, social workers, personal injury attorneys, journalists, film makers in Hollywood, group therapists and community organizers are liberals. Liberals meddled in our national pastime and invented the designated hitter rule because it wasn't fair to make the pitcher also bat.

Conservatives drink real beer. They eat red meat and still provide for their women. Conservatives are members of the military, big game hunters, rodeo cowboys, lumberjacks, construction workers, firemen, medical doctors, police officers, engineers, corporate executives, athletes, fighter pilots, and generally anyone who works productively. Conservatives who own companies hire other Conservatives who want to work for a living.

Liberals produce little or nothing. They like to govern the producers and decide what to do with the production. Liberals believe Europeans are more enlightened than Americans. That is why most of the liberals remained in Europe when Conservatives were coming to America. They crept in after the Wild West was tamed and created a business of trying to get more for nothing.

Here ends today's lesson in world history. It should be noted that a liberal may have a momentary urge to angrily respond to this post.

A Conservative will simply laugh and be so convinced of the absolute truth of this history that it will be shared immediately to other true believers and to just piss-off more liberals.

And there you have it. Let your next action reveal your true self, I'm going to grab a few beers and grill some steaks!
  
Reply With Quote

Old
  (#2)
Sev
I taut I saw a pussy cat!
Sev has a reputation beyond reputeSev has a reputation beyond reputeSev has a reputation beyond reputeSev has a reputation beyond reputeSev has a reputation beyond reputeSev has a reputation beyond reputeSev has a reputation beyond reputeSev has a reputation beyond reputeSev has a reputation beyond reputeSev has a reputation beyond reputeSev has a reputation beyond repute
 
Sev's Avatar
 
Status: Online
Posts: 101,862
vCash: 500
iTrader: 14 / 100%
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: State of Franklin
   
12-06-2019, 08:32 AM

LOL.

I cant wait for Patricia's snarky come back.


Keep your head down and admire the shot.


COVFEFE!!



“Nothing in the world is more dangerous than a sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.”---Martin Luther King, Jr.

"Yep. Sev is smarter than you all."
"I dont know much."
"I'm just a flea along for the ride."--366Robin


Revelations of truth undermine a foundation of belief built on lies.---Sev
  
Reply With Quote
Old
  (#3)
tableroll
AzB Silver Member
tableroll has a reputation beyond reputetableroll has a reputation beyond reputetableroll has a reputation beyond reputetableroll has a reputation beyond reputetableroll has a reputation beyond reputetableroll has a reputation beyond reputetableroll has a reputation beyond reputetableroll has a reputation beyond reputetableroll has a reputation beyond reputetableroll has a reputation beyond reputetableroll has a reputation beyond repute
 
Status: Offline
Posts: 1,131
vCash: 500
iTrader: 0 / 0%
Join Date: Sep 2012
   
12-06-2019, 11:40 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by tableroll View Post
Neither the glass bottle nor aluminum can were invented yet, so while our early humans were sitting around waiting for them to be invented, they just stayed close to the brewery. That's how villages were formed.

The wheel was invented to get man to the beer and vice versa. These two were the foundation of modern civilization and together were the catalyst for the splitting of humanity into two distinct subgroups:

1. Liberals.
2. Conservatives.

Some men spent their days tracking and killing animals to BBQ at night while they were drinking beer. This was the beginning of what is known as the Conservative movement.

Other men who were less skilled at hunting, called "vegetarians", which was an early human word meaning "bad hunter", learned to live off the Conservatives by showing up for the nightly BBQ's and doing the sewing, fetching, and hairdressing. This was the beginning of the liberal movement.

Some of these liberal men “evolved” into women. Others became known as girlie-men. Some noteworthy liberal achievements include the domestication of cats, the invention of group therapy, group hugs, and the concept of democratic voting to decide how to divide the meat and beer that Conservatives provided.

Over the years Conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest, most powerful land animal on earth, the elephant. Liberals are symbolized by the jackass for obvious reasons.

Modern Liberals like special flavored beer (with lime added), but most prefer white wine spritzers or imported bottled water. They eat raw fish but like their beef well done. Sushi, tofu, and French food are standard liberal fare. Another interesting evolutionary side note: many liberal women have higher testosterone levels than their men.

Most college professors, social workers, personal injury attorneys, journalists, film makers in Hollywood, group therapists and community organizers are liberals. Liberals meddled in our national pastime and invented the designated hitter rule because it wasn't fair to make the pitcher also bat.

Conservatives drink real beer. They eat red meat and still provide for their women. Conservatives are members of the military, big game hunters, rodeo cowboys, lumberjacks, construction workers, firemen, medical doctors, police officers, engineers, corporate executives, athletes, fighter pilots, and generally anyone who works productively. Conservatives who own companies hire other Conservatives who want to work for a living.

Liberals produce little or nothing. They like to govern the producers and decide what to do with the production. Liberals believe Europeans are more enlightened than Americans. That is why most of the liberals remained in Europe when Conservatives were coming to America. They crept in after the Wild West was tamed and created a business of trying to get more for nothing.

Here ends today's lesson in world history. It should be noted that a liberal may have a momentary urge to angrily respond to this post.

A Conservative will simply laugh and be so convinced of the absolute truth of this history that it will be shared immediately to other true believers and to just piss-off more liberals.

And there you have it. Let your next action reveal your true self, I'm going to grab a few beers and grill some steaks!
Socialism/Communism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance and the gospel of envy, it's inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery.
  
Reply With Quote
Old
  (#4)
Smooth
AzB Silver Member
Smooth has a reputation beyond reputeSmooth has a reputation beyond reputeSmooth has a reputation beyond reputeSmooth has a reputation beyond reputeSmooth has a reputation beyond reputeSmooth has a reputation beyond reputeSmooth has a reputation beyond reputeSmooth has a reputation beyond reputeSmooth has a reputation beyond reputeSmooth has a reputation beyond reputeSmooth has a reputation beyond repute
 
Status: Offline
Posts: 3,093
vCash: 500
iTrader: 10 / 100%
Join Date: Aug 2010
   
12-06-2019, 12:20 PM

You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to tableroll again.
  
Reply With Quote
Old
  (#5)
Black-Balled
He Rides the Skies
Black-Balled has a reputation beyond reputeBlack-Balled has a reputation beyond reputeBlack-Balled has a reputation beyond reputeBlack-Balled has a reputation beyond reputeBlack-Balled has a reputation beyond reputeBlack-Balled has a reputation beyond reputeBlack-Balled has a reputation beyond reputeBlack-Balled has a reputation beyond reputeBlack-Balled has a reputation beyond reputeBlack-Balled has a reputation beyond reputeBlack-Balled has a reputation beyond repute
 
Black-Balled's Avatar
 
Status: Online
Posts: 40,270
vCash: 1200
iTrader: 14 / 100%
Blog Entries: 1
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: This Toilet Earth
  Send a message via AIM to Black-Balled  
12-06-2019, 12:48 PM

That was pretty funny.
  
Reply With Quote
Old
  (#6)
BryanB
Huge Balls
BryanB has a reputation beyond reputeBryanB has a reputation beyond reputeBryanB has a reputation beyond reputeBryanB has a reputation beyond reputeBryanB has a reputation beyond reputeBryanB has a reputation beyond reputeBryanB has a reputation beyond reputeBryanB has a reputation beyond reputeBryanB has a reputation beyond reputeBryanB has a reputation beyond reputeBryanB has a reputation beyond repute
 
BryanB's Avatar
 
Status: Offline
Posts: 904
vCash: 1700
iTrader: 3 / 100%
Blog Entries: 1
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Huntsville, AL
   
12-06-2019, 12:52 PM



Bryan
USAF Retired 1988-2009

ACS Instructor
OB Cues - Dealer & Player representative
Magic Chalk Dealer
  
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.9
Copyright ©2000 - 2020, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
vBulletin Security provided by vBSecurity (Lite) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2020 DragonByte Technologies Ltd.