Cathartic pool confession

[Merlinium]

This is an extension of a post I made in the thread about poolmouse sharking.

In it I stated that whilst sometimes sharking can put you off that I have used it as an excuse when I have lost not because of the sharking but because of my own fears. To start let me say I play UK 8ball, just in case anybody was wondering about the example below.

To illustrate my point, if I was say playing a player who was expected to beat me but who also is prone to trying to shark people. I have at times when faced with the possibility of winning (for example on a reasonably tough shot, say a 6 or 7 out of ten shot, on an 8ball) became so afraid of the possibility that I might miss and lose that I have found myself focusing on the sharking to the point were it distracts me enough to cause me to lose.

Now some people would say that I probably couldn't control it but I think back that I have maybe made 6 or 7 shots previously without his sharking bothering me, so why did it bother me then.

More and more I am beginning to think that if I am aware of it happening that I must be letting it happen.

Another problem I have is that I never give my best in competition, I can play at a high level in practice, which I never transition into games in the same way. As such the people who know me well all think that if I gave the game more effort I could become reallly good.

I have tried thinking on this and I thought about excuses like how the fact that when I play well it means that when I practice with my friends they do not enjoy it as much as I am constantly winning, I then add in the fact that due to my work pattern I am not practising as much as I should be.

The truth is that in my heart of hearts I am afraid to try my best, as my best is pretty good and when I am practising by myself and breaking and clearing racks I can feel secure in the fact that I am better than most of the other people I know but I am scared that if I did try my best I might find out I was wrong.

I have absolutely no real defense to criticism with this mindset but I doubt I am alone in having it. I have probably posted some contradictory statements to this in the past but this is probably the truth. The reason why I am confident this is closer to the truth is that it feels true and my body is telling me it is (heart pounding, throat closing, hands shaking and brain telling me not to post this because if I post it people will see it).

Hopefully by admitting this it will be the first step in getting the courage to give my all when I play.

 

[bsmutz]

I'm not sure that admitting something to yourself (and the universe, too) is going to solve anything. I've had a similar situation happen to me a couple of times over the past couple of months. I'm playing someone who I know will most likely beat me if I make any mistakes. I'll play great until I get a comfortable lead, then have them win 4 or 5 games in a row to beat me. It may be that recognizing the problem will lead you to find a solution. It definitely sounds like a mental issue that you will need to deal with. I've always been a fierce competitor and getting beat only makes me want to win more. I recognize the fact that I'm a small fish in a big sea and that there will always be people out there that will hand me my a**. But as long as I'm willing to go out there and compete, I should respect myself enough to give it my best shot. It always seems that in retrospect I can find flaws/errors that make me realize that no matter what I was thinking at the time, I could have given it a better effort. That's what I practice for, to find a way to eliminate those flaws/errors that come up fairly consistently until one day I can look at my competitive play and say, "Yeah, that was my best." I think that's still a few years down the road.
I guess I'd say to you, don't be complacent and don't worry that your best isn't good enough. It's pretty much a given impossibility that it will ever be good enough to beat everyone all the time. So you take your lumps and give them and hope to find satisfaction in that. My personal goal is to at least let the better known players in the venues that I play in know that they can't let up on me.

 

[Merlinium]

I'm not sure that admitting something to yourself (and the universe, too) is going to solve anything.

Thanks for the kind words and advice.

I am pretty sure it will solve little but by admitting my guilt it allows me to realise that it exists.

It was either this or the asking the universe thing and if that worked we would all go home to find supermodels in bed waiting for us

Forget world peace, go supermodels

Wait, no I am incorrect. Supermodels are the secret to world peace, if we were all seeing supermodels noone would have time to commit crimes or make war (or go to work, or pretty much anything else I guess).

 

[ShootingArts]

ego

It requires ego to compete well. We may sound modest or we may sound egotistical however down inside everyone that competes well must have a pretty substantial ego. We think that we are better than the people we are competing with, at the least that we can beat them on a given occasion. When we don't, we might as well concede and move on because the vast majority of time lack of belief in ourselves leads us to play as we picture ourselves inside.

When two champions meet, they both feel that they can win if they can get to the table. That belief leads to some incredible comebacks. However sometimes even the top pro's are doubtful of their abilities on a given day. If you watch body language and facial expressions it is sometimes possible to predict a winner early in a match up.

Wake up in the morning, look in the mirror and tell yourself you are a competitor second to none. Write it, read it often. Put up signs where you can't help but read them often. Make one a screen saver on your computer. You may lose on the table now and then but nobody has to have more heart. That is something that can be developed.

I was a shy self-conscious teenager lacking confidence competing against the best in the gulf coast area when I realized it took a hell of an ego to think I could win with little experience, money, or knowledge. Most people that know me will tell you that I still ain't very good at winning but a lack of confidence isn't my problem!

Hu

This is an extension of a post I made in the thread about poolmouse sharking.

In it I stated that whilst sometimes sharking can put you off that I have used it as an excuse when I have lost not because of the sharking but because of my own fears. To start let me say I play UK 8ball, just in case anybody was wondering about the example below.

To illustrate my point, if I was say playing a player who was expected to beat me but who also is prone to trying to shark people. I have at times when faced with the possibility of winning (for example on a reasonably tough shot, say a 6 or 7 out of ten shot, on an 8ball) became so afraid of the possibility that I might miss and lose that I have found myself focusing on the sharking to the point were it distracts me enough to cause me to lose.

Now some people would say that I probably couldn't control it but I think back that I have maybe made 6 or 7 shots previously without his sharking bothering me, so why did it bother me then.

More and more I am beginning to think that if I am aware of it happening that I must be letting it happen.

Another problem I have is that I never give my best in competition, I can play at a high level in practice, which I never transition into games in the same way. As such the people who know me well all think that if I gave the game more effort I could become reallly good.

I have tried thinking on this and I thought about excuses like how the fact that when I play well it means that when I practice with my friends they do not enjoy it as much as I am constantly winning, I then add in the fact that due to my work pattern I am not practising as much as I should be.

The truth is that in my heart of hearts I am afraid to try my best, as my best is pretty good and when I am practising by myself and breaking and clearing racks I can feel secure in the fact that I am better than most of the other people I know but I am scared that if I did try my best I might find out I was wrong.

I have absolutely no real defense to criticism with this mindset but I doubt I am alone in having it. I have probably posted some contradictory statements to this in the past but this is probably the truth. The reason why I am confident this is closer to the truth is that it feels true and my body is telling me it is (heart pounding, throat closing, hands shaking and brain telling me not to post this because if I post it people will see it).

Hopefully by admitting this it will be the first step in getting the courage to give my all when I play.