Lifetilt and how to deal with it? Long, need help for a good buddy.

D_Lewis

AzB Silver Member
Silver Member
I have a buddy, (this will also sound a lot like me, for those of you that know me) who has a problem with his temper and even after he's angry cannot regain any sort of composure. He's a good friend of mine and he is also a teammate during league. I play with him very often and he is usually a sparring partner for me when practicing for tournaments or just in every day sessions.

A little background: My friend and I play a lot together, I would like to think I was a big help in improving his game. He also improved very quickly over about a years time. If we were to set up an even game, I could probably give him maybe a 7-5/6-4 race and break even. He's a really good friend and I want to see him succeed, I havent seen anyone improve so rapidly and I see a lot of myself in him when he plays.

Here are a few examples of what happens:

1) For a few months I was too busy with school/work to play very often and he gave me a beating in that time. I would spot him and he would win, we'd play even and he would win. I recently have been putting a lot of time in practicing for tournaments and gambling, I have been laying the screws to him for about a month. I am playing better than I ever have and it seems every time he misses, I run out. This is getting him very frustrated.

2) We have a mutual friend who we both play. This person is the most unorthadox player Ive ever seen, plays the most confusion position, throws every single shot, if you were watching you wouldnt think he was even going to hit the ball on most shots (with how much throw/spin he uses). This player is also the luckiest person Ive ever seen play pool in the whole world! If the lucky guy gives my friend a spot, (they should be very close in skill, could go either way with a one game spot) but then gets lucky, my friend cant finish a single game after the guy shits a few balls in against him. He basically might as well forfiet the rest of the set.

3) Being unlucky. I for one use this as a reason during some sessions myself. I think I get very unlucky rolls where the people I play get very lucky during gambling sessions. My buddy also thinks he gets the same unlucky results when playing/gambling and it drives him crazy. Some times he plays a race to five, gets unlucky during the first game of the set and says we'll finish the set another day. I would like some help for both of us on this subject. It is all we can do is maybe try and negotiate a game where less luck is involved (call pocket, win by two, no jumpcues, etc etc) or are there other suggestions that may help us also.

4) Pleasures of small motions: I bought this book maybe a year ago, I found some very useful info in it for myself. I then passed the book onto my buddy and he seems to find it helpful also. Unfortunately, he still goes on crazy lifetilt and might not make a ball for a month if someone gets lucky against him.

If you took the time to read this thread, please take the time to offer some advice if you have any. Id really appreciate any time/help you can offer.

Thanks for reading, have a great week,
-Dan
 
you know i can certainly relate to you guys even today. however i don't get angry anymore...well i do but its rare. the thing i found most interesting about pool is my attitude...to give you an example: i play 9- ball so theres alot of shitting in balls and bad rolls...when i allow it to affect me for some reason the pools gos sense it and my oppnent gets luckier and luckier...however if i simply say to myself "well he wouldn't have gotten lucky if i hadn't of missed that last shot or a few shots ago", or " well that was than and this is now, all i can do is my best, play safe and move on"

I play alot for money and expensive because our economy sucks and i'm job less but i try to play better players and gamble cheap. I use to hate better player getting lucky on me, and i would throw my cue and kick the side of the pool table if i shot a hanger, and i would spend a lot of money on shafts and dent removals...

but what helped me was going threw the motions since i use to not listen, but one day a friend of mind told for your pleasure of small motion " maybe your expectation are exceeding your ability" and click i never threw a temper tantrum ever again, this doesn't mean i don't get upset, but hey the balls don't know i exist and they react to what i put on the cue ball...even if i put top right english and i don't get the reaction from the cue ball, guess what, i may have aimed for it somewhere on that last stroke i must have done something different...

but i do recommand another book called the inner game of tennis, and everything you read from that book you can apply it to pool. i don't suggest you read it in one shot, i recommand you read a chapter, highlight certain things thats seem powerful to you, digest the info in your mind and out it to practice, than move on to the next chapter...and after your done reading it...read it again so it stays in your mind, and when your game goes down of or something, read the book again especially your highlights...i use to play with ear phones and still do occasionally but i did it to block out the back ground and it help me "zone in" but after reading that, i'll take bet to see who can shark me...

Funny story: at the time i was dating my girlfriend now...and i would shoot lefty (i'm righty) to make it fun and interesting, well one day she made a bet that she thanks god to this day she lost. She ask "how good are you really because i never see you take this seriously"? and i said i don't take it seriously because i'm here hanging out with you and explained to her that when i take the game seriously i can't pay attention to her because it requires alot of concentration. and she said "i bet i can ruin your concentration" and i said i doubt...now please keep in mind today i can runout pretty good especially 8-ball but at the time i was a 5-6 in the apa...so i told her i bet i can run all the strips, than the solids and than make the 8 with only 2 misses...which mean i have to have something on the break, and if i miss i have one more chances...and if she could succeed i would buy her at least a 200 purse, but if i won i got a body massage. oh and last thing, i chnged back to righty, so i broke and played the rack, and she would rub cue stick on my leg or would touch my ass, and i remember i left myself the easiest 8ball dead in the hole, and she flashed her tits at me, and i said baby i'm going to be seeing more of those tonight, "slam", and i slept like a baby that night. THE INNER GAME OF TENNIS...buy it...read it...take notes...good things happen.
 
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