showing anger or disappointment

J

james51381

Registered
hey folks, i really appreciate all the advise on these boards.

I was playing in a local tournament and I was playing for first place, when i started to choke. I couldnt make a ball in a toilet. I started to show my anger and frustration. I know its something i should have control over, but should I try to become like a stone? like in poker, I know your always trying to hide if your on tilt.

thanks
 
I see it both ways...some people play better all pissed off, or with a "reason" to be angry hating their opponent, while others play great with an even keel.

I used to show every emotion, talk alot, pay attention to everything around me, and it hurt my game!....Then I was taught to just even things out...make no comments but good shot, or nice out, while still noticing everything, but not letting it affect me. It worked after about 6 months, and a few blow ups!

Don't get me wrong, sometimes I"m burning inside, but I can't let my opponent know what's up, or they might get a little jump from it. There's nothing better than sh*ttin in a ball four rails and not even acknowledging it, and just going right to the next shot and running out. You can see it in their face, they expect "the appology" but I don't give it. I just act like it was all supposed to be that way. Or when I blow an easy run, just turn around, sit down and watch the table, or ask the guy if he wants something to drink.

Origionally it was just supposed to calm me down, I never had any idea how much it affected other players when I played stone faced.

Gerry
 
Gerry said:
Or when I blow an easy run, just turn around, sit down and watch the table, or ask the guy if he wants something to drink.

Origionally it was just supposed to calm me down, I never had any idea how much it affected other players when I played stone faced.

Gerry
Click to expand...

You betcha. Doesn't affect everyone though. However, I remember a match against this fellow who was providing a blow by blow commentary of every shot he took, and made, or missed, he was a non-stop talker, trying to get me engaged with him. I just gave him a blank stare, and then another. You know, the cold treatment. He sure didn't like it. But heck, we're playing in a tournament and he wants me to start filling him in on my strategy? On one shot, I intentionally missed what was a pretty easy shot, and it kinda messed with his mind. "Did you try to make that shot??" Blank stared him. He almost started whining. Needless to say, I won. Think I skunked him. His emotions did him in.

Flex
 
Winner's Circle Network with Lou Tice - 3/24/06 - "Reason and Emotions"

The ability to reason and understand is important to our well-being, but so
is our ability to feel emotions. Let's look at how the two fit together.

Intelligence is a wonderful thing. Our ability to reason, to make rational
choices, and to look at things analytically has given humanity many great
things. But when the mind is operating without the heart, when intellect
rules without benefit of humility, we often end up in very deep trouble. In
the 20th century alone, we saw the most cultured nation in Europe launch the
Holocaust and the most creative scientists among us have managed to spoil
our air and drinking water.

Have you ever wondered why so many people seem to be afraid of their
feelings? They are determined to avoid appearing openly emotional and they
often behave scornfully to others who are in the grip of strong feelings.
They want to feel in control at all times, but one of the things about being
fully human is acknowledging that reason can only go so far. There are some
things in life that are deeply mysterious. They defy logical explanation,
and require that we accept rather than understand.

Sometimes we need to care and show kindness rather than dissect and analyze.
Remember the scientists in the movie "E.T.?" They were driven by their
intellects to study this wonderful creature instead of loving and learning
from him, something the children did quite naturally.

So don't let your quest to understand life prevent you from truly
experiencing it, and don't let your desire for knowledge keep you from
achieving real wisdom.

Lou Tice
The Pacific Institute
www.thepacificinstitute.com

"TPI teaches people how to manage change, set and achieve goals, lead more
effectively, and think in ways that create success."

Jeff Livingston
 
Ronoh said:
You can answer you're own question.

Look from the outside in. Do You like what you see.

Adjust accordingly.
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Good response. When my game goes to sh*t in a match, the best thing I can do is talk myself into feeling confident - don't get disgusted with myself and at least try to show confidence externally, even when shot after shot sucks. Then between games ask someone to watch a few shots and tell me if something is grossly wrong. Without fail, there is a minor adjustment I need to make that is easy for others to see who know me.
 
If you wrote this post, you probably need to cool off. I'd study tapes of the most composed pro players out there...

Some show absolutely no emotion, like say, Hohmann; while others release frustration optimumly, like Efren or Parica (they use humor as a tactic;) ).

But one thing is for sure, NO player who's playing his best is cursing, banging the table, and throwing shit around. While emotions need to be acknowledged and responded to, extreme emotion will never let you play your best.

It also depends on your ethic toward the game, why you play the game, and how you handle failure in life.

P.S. My favorite player as far as the mental game is concerned is Jim Rempe. I'd study him. AND, I'd pick up a copy of "The Inner Game of Tennis" or "Pleasures of Small Motions."
 
It may be right for you to release your emotion, but you have to realize that that one small release is all you get. If you carry it with you, you are doomed. Some learn to repress it. Some learn to express it in various ways that aren't destructive.
 
james51381 said:
hey folks, i really appreciate all the advise on these boards.

I was playing in a local tournament and I was playing for first place, when i started to choke. I couldnt make a ball in a toilet. I started to show my anger and frustration. I know its something i should have control over, but should I try to become like a stone? like in poker, I know your always trying to hide if your on tilt.

thanks
Click to expand...

Hey, I represent that!
 
I've got a teammate on my league team who generally, when warming up or shooting outside league, is fine - but when it comes down to a real match against an opponent, if he starts to go downhill, he really goes downhill. He gets angry with himself, which makes him miss more easy shots, which makes him MORE angry with himself, etc. It's nigh impossible for him to recover at that point.

One tactic I've started doing to prevent this sort of thing from happening to me is to simply NOT WATCH my opponent shoot. If I miss a shot, I go back over to where my stuff is, and largely turn my back on the table, unless there's no one else watching my opponent or I just consider my opponent to be a sneaky enough weasel to try to pull something. :P

I can't claim to be in that zen-like zone where I've got a poker face 100% of the time - I'm a lot better than I used to be. I'll make comments for my own benefit when I miss an easy shot, or a shot crucial to a pending run-out, but that's about it these days. I don't sit there and beat myself up, fuming like I did in the past - it does nothing but harm to my game.
 
There is something to be said for letting it out when it happens, rather than stewing on it. if I screw up I might swear a little bit of a blue streak, but once I've done that it's over and I can leave it in the past.

I know if I don't let it out when it happens, I stew over it and then it effects my game. so calling the CB a sl_t that's been on the end of every guys stick is a humorus, although crude way of expressing my anger and getting it out of my system.:p
 
lewdo26 said:
But one thing is for sure, NO player who's playing his best is cursing, banging the table, and throwing shit around. While emotions need to be acknowledged and responded to, extreme emotion will never let you play your best.
Click to expand...

Can you be my corner man on leage nights?
 
Just my two cents.....pride stands in the way of many players (myself included).....I have been known to get angry at myself because of shots I chose or missed, but when it comes down to it, I did not give 100% on the shot and I was angry for looking stupid for missing the shot....it bruised my ego/pride concerning the game. I am also "the talker" during matches, always talking about my shots and how I made it/missed it, etc. One day, a guy I was playing said "you talk too much" during the match and then after I mentioned it to him again. He said all that does is give the other player the upper hand because they have the mental advantage. True or not, it got me thinking and I now work on playing the best I can and letting the rest fall into place.

9balllvr
 
thanks folks for all the help...I think I will try to use all the advise and try to stay as 'stoned face' as I can with calling the cue ball a sl_t every once in a while.
 
James, people often choke when they start thinking about the outcome.

When you are preparing to shoot a shot, you should be thinking about the process of playing well and never about the outcome. The outcome will be the result of your efforts at the table. It is also important to consider all shots to be of the same importance. A difficult shot made is the same as an easy shot made. Don't puff up like a proud turkey when you make a good shot and don't show disappointment over an easy missed shot. Learn from the results of each shot and become a better player.

You cannot show any shot more importance over another shot or less importance if you want to play your best pool. Concentrate on the process of playing well and let the results speak for themselves. Let the results be something separate and apart from you and simply the results of your efforts. The results of a shot will be what is left from your effort so don't get confused with what's important. There is no need to think or worry about winning or losing while preparing for a shot as both of these will inhibit your ability to play well.

When you finally show each shot the same measured reverence, whether it is made or not, you will start to make the journey to pool Nirvana.

Warm Regards.
JoeyA

james51381 said:
hey folks, i really appreciate all the advise on these boards.

I was playing in a local tournament and I was playing for first place, when i started to choke. I couldnt make a ball in a toilet. I started to show my anger and frustration. I know its something i should have control over, but should I try to become like a stone? like in poker, I know your always trying to hide if your on tilt.

thanks
Click to expand...
 
I like Chefjeff and Gerry's coments here. But I would like to add to Ronoh's comments if I may.

Step outside of yourself at that instant those emotions start boiling. Ask this player (yourself) that's in this pressured situation questions to help him understand why this is happening. (Something has changed suddenly in your game you must pinpoint it.)

Be honest in your answers in the real reason why your game has fallen off. (You are not going to be ridiculed or embaressed by yourself for the betterment of your game.) You are in essence grabbing the bull by the horns and controlling it at the source.

Example: Thinking to onesself: I've played this guy before and he problable is going to win 2 out fo 3 times. He has no weakness I can see. Everyone around seem to know this as well. My chances are not good, not good at all...

We tend to try and erase these thoughts right away and say forget about it lets play! "No time for negitive thought, you say to yourself, think positive!" And off you go into the den after the lion.

The problem is the negitive thought is already out of the bag and it will stay negitive like a swimmer carrying a 10 pound weight.

You must confront that negitive thought by answering it and laying it to rest.

Thinking to onesself to answer the doubts: Sure this guy is good but out of the whole field who is facing him now? Me. I didnt get here by accident and my opponent knows that as well. If I bare down and play like I'm able I will force him earn everything. If he earns it I have lost nothing, because he beat a damn good player. As far as everyone else watching they didnt make it to this arena right now there thoughts are envy.

Again this is just an example I've made up off the top of my head. But the bottom line is that answer you give to yourself must, must be believeable! You cannot bullshit yourself.

It takes practice, but you will notice that even without this type of selftalk after numerous tourney's that favored player suddenly becomes beatable. Why because you are more comfortable with the situation at hand. Been there, done it before!

P.S. what Gerry said before is true. Showing emotion is like a poker tell, it can give your opponents game a lift. On the other hand, no emotion gives him no information, he starts to sweat and think more about you and your game....
 
you nailed it, JoeyA

tap, tap, tap, JoeyA
JoeyA said:
When you are preparing to shoot a shot, you should be thinking about the process of playing well and never about the outcome. The outcome will be the result of your efforts at the table. It is also important to consider all shots to be of the same importance. A difficult shot made is the same as an easy shot made. Don't puff up like a proud turkey when you make a good shot and don't show disappointment over an easy missed shot. Learn from the results of each shot and become a better player.

You cannot show any shot more importance over another shot or less importance if you want to play your best pool. Concentrate on the process of playing well and let the results speak for themselves. Let the results be something separate and apart from you and simply the results of your efforts. The results of a shot will be what is left from your effort so don't get confused with what's important. There is no need to think or worry about winning or losing while preparing for a shot as both of these will inhibit your ability to play well.

When you finally show each shot the same measured reverence, whether it is made or not, you will start to make the journey to pool Nirvana.

Warm Regards.
JoeyA
Click to expand...
 
james51381 said:
hey folks, i really appreciate all the advise on these boards.

I was playing in a local tournament and I was playing for first place, when i started to choke. I couldnt make a ball in a toilet. I started to show my anger and frustration. I know its something i should have control over, but should I try to become like a stone? like in poker, I know your always trying to hide if your on tilt.

thanks
Click to expand...

I feel your pain.... Different people tackle this differently.. For me I'd rather have a poker face. That way your opponent cannot read you. When you start dogging shots, dont beat up yourself about it. Its in the past and there nothing you can do about it now. Instead, analyze why you missed that shot ie pre-shot routine, bad aim, tough shot etc, and fix it accordingly. And when you get on the practice table, work on the shots that you've missed, your aiming, speed control etc.
 
i am a very kewl person and hardly get mad so i rarely show anger or disappointment at the table, but i know one thing i shure get hot when i start losing and clothes start to come off LOL.
 
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