Why do some people get mad when you ask them to gamble?

Just Play

I will hit some with anyone for any amount (I can afford) including for bragging rights and glory.

I just wanna play.

If you meet me at a poolroom, I might ask, "do you wanna hit some? If you say yes, I start racking. I'm gonna play no matter what. If you wanna play just to see who wins, fine. If you wanna play for $2. fine. If you wanna play $20 sets, all good. Just play.

If it's turns out to be no fun, quit. I have met some of the most interesting people by just playing some pool with them. I usually have a blast too.

Happy shooting people! (beats the alternative)

Ray
 
Over the last few months I have asked 3 different guys to play cheap and it seemed to really upset them. None of these folks were friends of mine or anything. My relationship with them is simply to say "hi" when I see them. They were all between 40 and mid 50's. I'm in my mid 30's. The situations have pretty much been the same. I would simply ask, "hey, do you want to play some cheap practice sets for like $10 or $20 a set?". I have never asked them in front of anyone else because I don't want them to be embarrassed if they don't want to play. I also said it quietly, so as not to be calling them out or anything. I have a really hard time focusing if it's for nothing. As far as skill goes, all three of these guys play very similar to me. Nobody really has an edge. In fact, two of the three beat me in short tournament races the last time they played me.

All three times they made an excuse that didn't make any sense and now won't make eye contact with me or speak to me first. :( I feel like a jerk just because I don't like anyone being upset with me. I can understand if you don't gamble. That's fine, but you don't have to get mad about it. Gambling is part of pool and always will be IMO. Anyone else have this experience or can provide perspective from their side perhaps? Thanks.

I think there's a lot of people who don't gamble that probably would if they thought they had a for sure lock.
Many players probably take it personal when someone ask them to gamble,its almost like saying im better than you lets play.
What gets me is how many times have you ever ask a guy to play for something, he turns you down and then 5 minutes later there gambling with someone else.WTH:confused:
 
I think there's a lot of people who don't gamble that probably would if they thought they had a for sure lock.
Many players probably take it personal when someone ask them to gamble,its almost like saying im better than you lets play.
What gets me is how many times have you ever ask a guy to play for something, he turns you down and then 5 minutes later there gambling with someone else.WTH:confused:


lol, that's an EASY one. It's like the so-so dancer at the strip club that asks if you want a dance....you say no, and 5 minutes later you're spending 2 songs with the hottest girl in the place.

Your offer wasn't as attractive as the one he took! :p

Like a few others have pointed out, the things I really dislike about playing someone I don't know very well is 1) I don't like losing B) I am really not fond of folks that get REALLY mad when they lose. It's a lose/lose situation. I don't know if the guy can laugh off a couple of $20 set losses. That's why I try to stick to playing those I know at least a little about. Has nothing to do with losing a little money....I have self control and won't lose anything that would sting too much anyway. Some don't, and I don't want to win and have him really stung (has to go home and tell his wife he lost all the grocery money, or the rent payment, etc.), or worse yet, waiting for me in the parking lot to reclaim his money....Winning is no fun (to me) if you put a hurting on someone, and losing is NEVER fun.
 
Last edited:
As others have said your probably asking the wrong people. I'm just an average Joe and if someone i've just seen around a few times and don't know comes up to me asking to play for money i would think he was just trying to take money from me since i'm just average for fun player.

I also never understood the "I can't play my best unless it's for money" people, hell even if i play poker for a stack of jelly beans i'll still try and play the best i can to win, same with anything else, i always try to do my best.
 
For me the scenario is almost always the same. I play a guy for about an hour. We trade sets, maybe I’m up a bit. Then he says the “how about we put something on the game?” I say, “I don’t gamble.” Then comes the pleading. “Aw, come on, just $10 or $20 a set. I really need something to focus my attention.” I am not just recited the words of the OP, they always say the same thing. I can afford the money, and from my perspective, $10 a set is less than I would spend to enter a tournament. After I agree to play for the $10, I don’t get to play any longer. The last time I agreed to play for $10 a set, the guy ran the first 5 racks, left me hooked in the 6th, I hit a legal shot but left him open, he finished that rack and ran the next 3. I hit the cue ball once in 9 racks. He seemed surprised that I quit. He said he would give me weight. What good would weight do me if I don’t get to hit the ball? I paid him $20, no problem. I wasn’t upset and I am pleased for him that he finally “got his attention” and played so well. I am not worried that I was being hustled the first hour, because the stakes were so low. This was an extreme (real) example. But they generally end up pretty one-sided when there is money involved.

If there is a chance that I might win some of the sets, I don’t mind playing for small amounts. I am willing to play anybody straight up for table time. If I am playing someone really good and I get out-classed in a friendly game, out of courtesy, I will pay time even if it wasn’t agreed up front. I come to the pool hall to play pool. Why do I want to pay someone $10-20 at set to rack balls for him?
 
Leagues and Gambling

I tend to agree that handicapped pool leagues are bad for action. Case in point, the room I used to play in had about 20-30 regular customers that you could get a 5 dollar barbox 8 ball game with almost any night of the week. We all knew each other and you could make(or lose) a few bucks each night and it was no big deal, just fun. Along comes apa, starts an in house league, next thing you know all these guys that used to gamble together are worried how many innings they had and how they can stay a 4 forever. That was like 5 years ago, all those players used to play me even, now I would rob them because I continued to play and strive for improvement, they did not. When you bet something in a game it forces you to try your best or your going to get busted, plain and simple. I truely became a better player by gambling. Of course that is not the only way, but it worked for me.
 
For me the scenario is almost always the same. I play a guy for about an hour. We trade sets, maybe I’m up a bit. Then he says the “how about we put something on the game?” I say, “I don’t gamble.” Then comes the pleading. “Aw, come on, just $10 or $20 a set. I really need something to focus my attention.” I am not just recited the words of the OP, they always say the same thing. I can afford the money, and from my perspective, $10 a set is less than I would spend to enter a tournament. After I agree to play for the $10, I don’t get to play any longer. The last time I agreed to play for $10 a set, the guy ran the first 5 racks, left me hooked in the 6th, I hit a legal shot but left him open, he finished that rack and ran the next 3. I hit the cue ball once in 9 racks. He seemed surprised that I quit. He said he would give me weight. What good would weight do me if I don’t get to hit the ball? I paid him $20, no problem. I wasn’t upset and I am pleased for him that he finally “got his attention” and played so well. I am not worried that I was being hustled the first hour, because the stakes were so low. This was an extreme (real) example. But they generally end up pretty one-sided when there is money involved.

If there is a chance that I might win some of the sets, I don’t mind playing for small amounts. I am willing to play anybody straight up for table time. If I am playing someone really good and I get out-classed in a friendly game, out of courtesy, I will pay time even if it wasn’t agreed up front. I come to the pool hall to play pool. Why do I want to pay someone $10-20 at set to rack balls for him?

Stories like that are the reason why pool players have a worst reputation than charles manson. Pool needs to find out how poker lost it's dirtbag image and replicate that...lol.
 
Woof Biscuit

Maybe you can't get a game because are you just too forward.

Strangers in a pool room just don't interact well with the regulars until they get to know them. It takes time.
But, if you aren't the 'stranger' and these players just don't want to play you, then it might just be that they just don't like you. Just saying.

I don't think you would have any trouble getting a game in any pool room if the heavies jumped on your offer to play cheap sets. Why don't you find out who they are first and improve your game with them?
 
I don't gamble anymore. So, when someone asks me... I almost feel bad for telling them no. I know what it is like to gamble and not be able to find a game. Many people have nothing else to play for other than the thrill of winning or loosing money. I found that I enjoyed the game much more when I wasn't focusing on that type of activity. So, sometimes I feel like I am making the sport un-fun for them.

Also, I hate it when I get asked to gamble by a guy and then another guy asks me 5 minutes later.... then another guy 5 minutes after that. Then the first guy says I've been watching you play and you are pretty good... we would match up well... you're better than me. Let's just gamble for something cheap... Most of the time, people just won't take no for an answer and I don't like repeating myself. I told you once with my mouth...don't make me tell you with my knuckles.

Most of the time, I just want to be left alone at the pool hall. Or, I just want to play with friends.

So, I don't want to be asked to gamble....but I don't get mad unless you won't let it go. If you need pool to make a living, then 1. you're asking the wrong person to make your living off of. And 2. you should be out finding a job instead of wasting your time in a pool hall. I don't mean these comments at the original poster. I mean these comments to the pool hall rats I see lurking everyday and pouncing on everyone that comes in the door. Sad thing is, I can easily beat 95% of them but addiction is a hard beast to tame and if you are addicted to gambling, you don't really care if you get beat.

r,

Greg
 
The logical extreme for a diplomatic invitation to gamble, assuming you're not a hustler but an honest person looking for fair action ----

"Forgive the interruption. My name's John. I wanted to ask you a question and if you say no, I'll understand in full. I was wondering if you might enjoy playing a match with me for a few dollars. I've seen you play and I think the match would be close. You'd be doing me a favor, for in my experience, the pressure of a small wager helps me to perform at a higher level. As I said, though, if you'd rather not, that's OK."

It's funny how different people react to different approaches. I'd much rather someone just come up to me and say, "You wanna play some cheap $20 sets?" than to say what you've said here. If they say what you've said here my first thought would be that they're trying to win an Oscar and probably think they're playing me for a chump. Next they're gonna ask me if I have any Grey Poupon.
 
Everyone Plays for Something

Some bet $$$, some bet their pride. My self esteem is worth more to me then a few dollars. I think a $5, $10, or $20 game is nothing compared to my self worth. The worst losers are always the ones who play for pride. They are the ones that always say they are only playing for fun, but as soon as they win a game from a decent player, they are telling the whole world about it.

Give me a break. I get really tired of hearing this crap. Everybody plays for something. The ones that gripe me the most are the ones that are always talking the big talk but never taking the long walk. If you get asked to play for money, and that's not your style, then have enougth backbone to say so without being a jerk about it.

I have also bowled, and played tennis and golf. Everyone plays for something. If I ask someone to play for a few $$$ and they don't like it, ok. If everyone likes me I know I'm doing something wrong, because the only type of person I know that everyone likes is called a loser.
 
Some bet $$$, some bet their pride. My self esteem is worth more to me then a few dollars. I think a $5, $10, or $20 game is nothing compared to my self worth. The worst losers are always the ones who play for pride. They are the ones that always say they are only playing for fun, but as soon as they win a game from a decent player, they are telling the whole world about it.

Give me a break. I get really tired of hearing this crap. Everybody plays for something. The ones that gripe me the most are the ones that are always talking the big talk but never taking the long walk. If you get asked to play for money, and that's not your style, then have enougth backbone to say so without being a jerk about it.

I have also bowled, and played tennis and golf. Everyone plays for something. If I ask someone to play for a few $$$ and they don't like it, ok. If everyone likes me I know I'm doing something wrong, because the only type of person I know that everyone likes is called a loser.


So are you saying that there aren't people that play just because they like to play? Everything has to be about money or bragging rights?

I don't buy it.

No disrespect intended.

r,

Greg
 
"Gambling is when you stand to be hurt if you lose. Where you can't pay the rent or feed the kids. That's a gamble." Wrong, that is irresponsible and just plain stupidity.

The rest of your post? You forgot to put 'sometimes', 'some of the people I see that won't gamble' or 'IMO'.

No way you reference the majority of people that play pool but won't bet on it.

'I better not see you over at those machines in a few minutes.' why? you have 0 say in what others do with their $.

English, do you comprehend it?

Nice half quote though. What I said was actually "If you expect me to believe you can't afford it I better not see you over at those machines in a few minutes." The only "say" I was having over his money was whether or not I believe he can afford to gamble or not.

Apparently you're one of those machine addicts who always talks about how much they "hit" but never how much they wasted to do it? And yes in my experience I do reference the vast majority of pool players I have observed unwilling to put anything on their hand/eye skills. They usually show up dumping money like that. If it wasn't so true it would be funny.
 
I've got another question. What do you normally gamble for? I see you're from Florida and it's not likely that I will be headed your way so I'm not asking if you want to play me.

Perhaps the others have heard of your gambling exploits and have already pegged you with their personal perception of what they have heard about you. If you are known to gamble $50 or $100 a set or more, they may feel that you are just baiting them with the cheap set talk.

I like the suggestion Bob Jewett made best out of all the suggestions. If they want to play you some cheap sets they will.

I've got similar problems. I'm known to play hard whether I practice by myself, compete against others for funzies or if I am gambling. I sometimes see people who gamble, gambling with even better players than myself for cheap sets. Those same people love to practice with me (for free) and more often than not, I win although it is not always an easy go. If I ask them if they would like to play cheap sets like they play with other, better player, they tell me that they can't beat me. :thud::speechless: I guess it could be because the other better player lays it down pretty good and keeps the game close and every now and then the better player lets the lesser player win every now and then, just to keep them interested. If I can, I'm going to beat them 10 out of 10 tries. :D Maybe they would rather be deceived rather than have an honest measure of their game. :(
 
"not right now" works. If they have an issue then it's their issue as long as you weren't barking at them and calling them out.

Anytime you ask someone in private to do something and the conversation is respectful then there is no reason for them to be upset with you. If they are then they have something going on.

A lot of times I go to the pool room and I have no money, maybe $30 on me. I could go to the ATM and get a couple thousand but I will often say "no thanks, I don't have any money on me."

Don't sweat it but maybe you should be the one who asks them if everything's cool.
 
The logical extreme for a diplomatic invitation to gamble, assuming you're not a hustler but an honest person looking for fair action ----

"Forgive the interruption. My name's John. I wanted to ask you a question and if you say no, I'll understand in full. I was wondering if you might enjoy playing a match with me for a few dollars. I've seen you play and I think the match would be close. You'd be doing me a favor, for in my experience, the pressure of a small wager helps me to perform at a higher level. As I said, though, if you'd rather not, that's OK." The invitaiton may be accepted, but if the player does not wish to gamble, say "have a nice evening and good luck with your practice and, once again, I'm sorry to have interrupted you."

No matter how this turns out, you have treated this person with respect.

:-) LOL I think others already nailed it but this sounds like the 1853 version of "I haven't hit a ball in a month but I will try some cheap if you want."

I swear you plagiarized this from the 1909 Revision of Professor Balke's Treatise on the Etiquette of Billiard Sharps.
 
I will hit some with anyone for any amount (I can afford) including for bragging rights and glory.

I just wanna play.

If you meet me at a poolroom, I might ask, "do you wanna hit some? If you say yes, I start racking. I'm gonna play no matter what. If you wanna play just to see who wins, fine. If you wanna play for $2. fine. If you wanna play $20 sets, all good. Just play.

If it's turns out to be no fun, quit. I have met some of the most interesting people by just playing some pool with them. I usually have a blast too.

Happy shooting people! (beats the alternative)

Ray

I like this approach, Ray! It covers almost all the bases (everything but high-dollar sets).

I too just want to play someone, anyone. But.....I won't ever gamble again. If someone comes over to my table and wants to play just for play, and we play for HOURS, win or lose I'm paying for the table time and ask for nothing from my opponent. This is in appreciation for having someone to play against.

As far as the OP's first post....I don't/won't get mad at anyone that asks me to gamble as long as they accept/respect my refusal and they don't keep hounding me to do so. Like someone said in another post, some people are just quirky and just don't want to be asked.

Maniac
 
Sometimes it's the other way around. I've seen lock artists begging for a game with someone and when the other person lets them know they aren't interested, they start acting like a b***h, telling the prospective customer that they don't have any gamble or that they are a nit or some other stupid remark, acting like they are angry because the other person wasn't interested in gambling with them. :p:p:p That amazes me more than the situation you described. :D When someone doesn't want to gamble with me and I know that they gamble, I just leave them alone. Trying to get the other person angry enough to accept the gambling challenge is a childish thing to do, imo.
 
Because they are Americans, and they have out of control egos.

Why do many people get mad when you make them an offer when something is up for sale? If you really think about that last question, how could they possibly get upset? You just gave them an option they didn't have. But they do get upset = ego.
 
because.. "some" gambling addicts are relentless and they hound you and hound you all f*king night until you leave earlier than you wanted to just to get away from that asshole...

then the next guy to ask gets treated like crap because Asshole #1 burned up all of your goodwill...

if you have been snapped at more than once in a night.. YOU are the asshole
 
Last edited:
Back
Top