Update: Scene 3 added below in post #16. See post #1 and #11 for the first two scenes of the Earl Strickland Reality Show.
A lot of us have wished for an Earl reality show. Well, we've yet to see that, but here's how I imagine a typical scene would go. Anyone have other ideas?
Scene 1 - Typical Morning at Earls
The scene opens in Earl's apartment in Queens. It's 10am and he's just woken following his win in night two of the Earl vs Efren 10 foot challenge match. He climbs out of bed, already wearing is jogging shorts and shoes, and slips on a Steinway t-shirt he grabs off the floor. He walks into the kitchen and starts cooking breakfast as his roommate, Jayson Shaw, walks in the front door. Jayson looks disheveled as he sets his cue case next to the door. He looks back out the door and yells "Thanks, hon!" as he waves to a leggy blond who is pulling away in her canary yellow Ferrari.
Jayson opens the small closet next to the front door. On the door is some masking tape with the words "Lucasi Rejects" written on it. He opens his cue case and pours out the remains of a broken Air Hog jump cue, on top of the shards of three other broken cues. He reaches into the back of the closet and pulls out a new Air Hog and removes it's protective plastic sleeve. Earl, now wearing a Kamui bandana on his head as he stirs a skillet of scrambled eggs, says "Another defective Lucasi? When are you going to dump those guys?"
"Yeah I know. So get this. I'm running out good, but then I one-stroked a shot and hooked myself on the 7. I missed the jump and then snapped the cue... I tell ya, these cues are not built to withstand actual playing conditions. I mean, I didn't use my knee; I just grabbed the ends in my hands and snapped it in half."
Earl interrupts, fire in his eyes. "You kids today... I used to break full length cues, and I didn't have to use my damn knee or nothing! Once in '93 I snapped a CueTec with my bare hands. And you know, those damn things are made out of titanium!" Earl regains his composure and turns back to the skillet. "That's why I had Gulyassy make my 70 inch for me. The secret? He hollows out the core and pours a thin bead of molten steel into the shaft. He challenged me to snap it. I couldn't do it and I've been with him ever since." Earl waves his hands at the universe.
Jayson shakes his head in admiration. "Well, normally I wouldn't have gotten upset, but there were a couple of girls watching and the cue ball flew off the table and hit Finnegan in the nose."
Earl jumps in, "Good! That guy was slug racking me all night. I told him to tap the 1-ball at a slight angle. See, that makes the dent in the cloth slightly oval shaped, which pulls the one ball tighter towards the rack... I don’t know why I tell you guys these secrets!"
On a roll, Earl continues, "And did you see what Efren was doing before the match? I'm 52 years old, working my butt off, practicing all afternoon on the 10 foot, and he's sitting over there playing chess. Chess!" Earl turns quiet and earnest, ignoring smoke that's starting up from the eggs. "That disrespects me... I'm one of the best athletes this country has ever seen and that disrespects me. It disrespects the game! But I tell you what, I found out what motel Efren is staying at, so during my five mile run this morning I'm going to swing by his window and yell some garbage at him. Teach him to disrespect me!"
Next Episode: Earl's jog by the motel backfires as Efren, tipped off by a disgruntled Finnegan, lies in wait.
A lot of us have wished for an Earl reality show. Well, we've yet to see that, but here's how I imagine a typical scene would go. Anyone have other ideas?
Scene 1 - Typical Morning at Earls
The scene opens in Earl's apartment in Queens. It's 10am and he's just woken following his win in night two of the Earl vs Efren 10 foot challenge match. He climbs out of bed, already wearing is jogging shorts and shoes, and slips on a Steinway t-shirt he grabs off the floor. He walks into the kitchen and starts cooking breakfast as his roommate, Jayson Shaw, walks in the front door. Jayson looks disheveled as he sets his cue case next to the door. He looks back out the door and yells "Thanks, hon!" as he waves to a leggy blond who is pulling away in her canary yellow Ferrari.
Jayson opens the small closet next to the front door. On the door is some masking tape with the words "Lucasi Rejects" written on it. He opens his cue case and pours out the remains of a broken Air Hog jump cue, on top of the shards of three other broken cues. He reaches into the back of the closet and pulls out a new Air Hog and removes it's protective plastic sleeve. Earl, now wearing a Kamui bandana on his head as he stirs a skillet of scrambled eggs, says "Another defective Lucasi? When are you going to dump those guys?"
"Yeah I know. So get this. I'm running out good, but then I one-stroked a shot and hooked myself on the 7. I missed the jump and then snapped the cue... I tell ya, these cues are not built to withstand actual playing conditions. I mean, I didn't use my knee; I just grabbed the ends in my hands and snapped it in half."
Earl interrupts, fire in his eyes. "You kids today... I used to break full length cues, and I didn't have to use my damn knee or nothing! Once in '93 I snapped a CueTec with my bare hands. And you know, those damn things are made out of titanium!" Earl regains his composure and turns back to the skillet. "That's why I had Gulyassy make my 70 inch for me. The secret? He hollows out the core and pours a thin bead of molten steel into the shaft. He challenged me to snap it. I couldn't do it and I've been with him ever since." Earl waves his hands at the universe.
Jayson shakes his head in admiration. "Well, normally I wouldn't have gotten upset, but there were a couple of girls watching and the cue ball flew off the table and hit Finnegan in the nose."
Earl jumps in, "Good! That guy was slug racking me all night. I told him to tap the 1-ball at a slight angle. See, that makes the dent in the cloth slightly oval shaped, which pulls the one ball tighter towards the rack... I don’t know why I tell you guys these secrets!"
On a roll, Earl continues, "And did you see what Efren was doing before the match? I'm 52 years old, working my butt off, practicing all afternoon on the 10 foot, and he's sitting over there playing chess. Chess!" Earl turns quiet and earnest, ignoring smoke that's starting up from the eggs. "That disrespects me... I'm one of the best athletes this country has ever seen and that disrespects me. It disrespects the game! But I tell you what, I found out what motel Efren is staying at, so during my five mile run this morning I'm going to swing by his window and yell some garbage at him. Teach him to disrespect me!"
Next Episode: Earl's jog by the motel backfires as Efren, tipped off by a disgruntled Finnegan, lies in wait.
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