Don't look to good at this stage according to this: http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/202650507/9-ball Sure hope other funds are coming in and this gets completed.
✯✯SHARKS Web Series Episode Three✯✯
- Thread starter cmbwsu
- Start date
Don't look to good at this stage according to this: http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/202650507/9-ball Sure hope other funds are coming in and this gets completed.
Sorry I missed the part where you became a writer, director, and producer. If you don't want to hear critiques of your work then test market it like the big boys do it.
As for your crack about working leather I'd take any of your criticism to heart and either provide a defense or get busy improving. I don't think that you want to do a serious heads-up side-by-side comparison between your stuff and our stuff though. If you do then I will be happy to let you film it in high definition as long as an independent and well known leather worker is doing the review.
I am sorry that your big project isn't getting the resonance you want but don't think it's just me. You misunderstand, I WANT to see you succeed with this and I want it to become something that somehow helps pool to grow.
But what I saw in this last episode doesn't do any of that for me. It's disjointed with no discernible story line, the characters are not well defined, the dialog is weak, and the technical part that you SHOULD have down, the pool, is not credible.
I feel honestly that this would tend to turn people off from pool. Wannabe hustlers who try to hustle girls out of sex with sexist comments would be either dramatic or funny with the right setup. As I see it though the way you delivered it is weak.
As for whether or not I like to look at women that has nothing to do with the focus you put on Jennifer's vaginal area. I like to look at cars too but I'd get bored if you kept going back to the engine block when filming the car. And what does the workout have to do with the story?
As I said a real writer would not hurt you guys. Or a better writer, or just better writing. I don't know, did I step on someone's toes about the writing? Do you have someone who has studied the craft and this is what they are putting out?
In any case I will continue to watch because I am a pool nerd. I will suffer through the mushy porn shots of Jen working out in order to see some pool shot in some semblance of a cinematic way.
Too many troll posts.
Most of the scenes look located in New York City. Jim was showing off some high profile friends in his production.
He had a highly rated pool room for pool scenes, a few touring pros and some strong locals.
The production does seem like Jim is showing off who his friends are. But it wasn't shamelessly promoting his own business or his friends, it was just promoting pool culture.
Some businesses post on the forum like they have no other way to promote their products/services. At least when Jim does it, he puts together a full production, not some 1 minute post using excessively long lists of adjectives.
In terms of film production I could tell he was limited to close range shots and the audio was clear. Considering the budget I'd say it seemed like a bunch of buddies having a good time poking fun at themselves.
The next evolution from a film is to produce a trailer.
Most of the scenes look located in New York City. Jim was showing off some high profile friends in his production.
He had a highly rated pool room for pool scenes, a few touring pros and some strong locals.
The production does seem like Jim is showing off who his friends are. But it wasn't shamelessly promoting his own business or his friends, it was just promoting pool culture.
Some businesses post on the forum like they have no other way to promote their products/services. At least when Jim does it, he puts together a full production, not some 1 minute post using excessively long lists of adjectives.
In terms of film production I could tell he was limited to close range shots and the audio was clear. Considering the budget I'd say it seemed like a bunch of buddies having a good time poking fun at themselves.
The next evolution from a film is to produce a trailer.
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Too late. The shots of the pool room are nice. I was just there a week and a half ago. Maybe I will catch you filming next time I am back in about five weeks.
Watched episodes 1 and 2 and while their not going to win a Emmy or a Webby award in my opinion over all seemed like a foot in the right direction... and then I watched episode 3 I almost turned it off but I watched it all got to say was a bit creepy at the beginning, odd sound editing through out, and the "green screen" err it would switch from looking very well filmed, good camera work to well bad.
Heres hoping episode 4 is better
Heres hoping episode 4 is better
Barretta's training scene seemed to be in the direction of something like GI Jane. But it wasn't as masculine.
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I have been eagerly waiting for episode 3. I absolutely am mesmerized by it all. I loved loved loved it even though I know it has major flaws. I have a hunch these have all been edited and finished already but I could be wrong.
I mentioned in the last thread that the actors would come off so much more natural if the editor didn't take wayyyyyyy too long to play the next actor's response. I maintain that.
Anyway I really love watching these. I only offer feedback because I know it is the cheapest fix and would make a world of difference.
I mentioned in the last thread that the actors would come off so much more natural if the editor didn't take wayyyyyyy too long to play the next actor's response. I maintain that.
Anyway I really love watching these. I only offer feedback because I know it is the cheapest fix and would make a world of difference.
Theres Vaginistical shots? Hey, its a great movie, don't be a bunch of haters.
Actually, I have tomorrow off. I think I am going to spark one up and try and watch these and see how far I can get. I'm thinking I might need to twist a second one up.
What I thought was really funny was when the girl sat down at the bar and asked for a Screw Driver. The bartender brought her a drink. Now, think of how funny it might have been if the bartender had actually brought her a screwdriver. I mean, ya gotta have some comic interlude no matter how many vaginal shots there are.
But seriously, I am just starting the first episode and so far, I think the cinematography is most excellent. I like anything pool. Pool Hall Junkies is still one of my favorite movies. Maybe the pro players could have stood to have a bit of coaching. I think that with a bit of coaching they could greatly improve.
Ya know, Jim never claimed to be Cecil B or anything. If Jim tries something like this again, I am sure he will include some acting coaches. That seems to be the only thing lacking thus far. Well, that and Kid Delicious. He seriously needs a part in the next series.
KD has an infectious grin. I think he would do well. If you take a look at his Hustler vid on UTube, the guy can act.
Edit. In PHJ, the shots sometimes seemed sped up. Like bang, bang bang bang. Balls being fired one by one into the same pocket for some kind of effect.
So far, I liked the set up shots. Pool being played at normal speed. The players displayed some very nice shots and safeties too.
I will be back, stay tuned for more of Fistful and Peepert.
2nd episode - The choice of music during the playing is decent. Jen B playing for her man. Again, the choice of shots to high light the set were right on.
3rd episode - Every time the girl made a nice shot there was cheering from the back ground altho no one was actually watching.
The canned cheering sounded like it was taken from a kids show. Could have seriously lost that part. Choice of music is still good.
Man, did that guy play it all wrong. That girl was a serious hotty. he lost in more ways than one. She did play her part well.
Looking forward to more episodes to see how this pool hall drama ends up. I bet there is some great playing and shots coming up in future installments.
And Jen B is still the hottest pro women in pool. There was some very nice breastises shots in there too.
Jim is making an effort to make a pool movie. I am impressed with the cinematography. I bet that Jim didn't get that for free.
There is a lot of editing involved even with just short installments like this. Him and his partner are probably putting out a bit of personal money for this. Lets give Jim a pat on the back and some credit for trying something new.
I'm sure its a learning experience for all and maybe the next short movie will be a hit. Rome wasn't built in a day.
OK, Fistfull and Peepert have to go to bed now. Long night at work.
Quote of the week:
You say this and then go on to tell Jim how to really do it. I guess its the same old story. Every thread that you involve yourself in is just all about you isn't it?
Star Wars could have been so much better if George Lucas had the foresight to call you first.
But then again, anyone who makes a UTube video on Kamui chalk and compares the process to virgin foreskin...........
Oh FK, I just gave myself nightmares again.
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I agree, but I wonder if it's the fact we know Jennifer and the world of pool is a small one. If it was a random actress maybe I wouldn't feel quite as uncomfortable. But this is someone I run into on occasion and I just don't think of her that way. She's quite attractive, don't get me wrong, but to me she's a pool-player. Not a "female" pool-player, but a pool-player.
Hopefully, the workout segment has some meaning yet to be shown, a portion of the back story with some sex-appeal thrown in for people not involved in pool. Webisodes can be annoying that way ... too much time passes between the clips and it feels disjointed.
I will say that the opening does 2 things: 1) It shows the dedication JenB has to working out, which is nice. 2) It tells me that JimM needs to just go head and shoot some softcore porn and get it out of his system. I mean, I like looking at women as much as the next guy, but I kept thinking "I wonder how Jen feels about this sequence." I'm not against objectification of women - IF that's what you're going for.
But if you're trying to show a workout routine, in an attempt to add depth to the character, close-ups on her hips from all angles doesn't really do it. If you're trying for sex appeal, then do it blatantly and then you can do it with some classy aspects (a sexy dress, or her getting ready for a date - like any of the hollywood movies would tease the audience with flesh). This voyeuristic/staring-from-across-the-room deal just makes it feel creepy.
Also, while I appreciate trying to build another sub-story into the plotline, it's too early to bring in 2 more characters out of the blue, when we haven't heard/seen anything from the guy who was "trying to get into the big money game" on the date with Caroline Pao. Only one story line has had any movement and that was left with a giant question mark (the Borana and JenB match) - what were the details for "up the bet" remark?
I will say the audio at the bar with bartender and the guy Jen/Borana were playing for was unusually low-fi.
I'm still curious to see what happens and I'll continue to be. I'd love to watch this series grow and mature along the way. Hopefully you can pull out the valuable criticisms from everyone and continue to improve.
But if you're trying to show a workout routine, in an attempt to add depth to the character, close-ups on her hips from all angles doesn't really do it. If you're trying for sex appeal, then do it blatantly and then you can do it with some classy aspects (a sexy dress, or her getting ready for a date - like any of the hollywood movies would tease the audience with flesh). This voyeuristic/staring-from-across-the-room deal just makes it feel creepy.
Also, while I appreciate trying to build another sub-story into the plotline, it's too early to bring in 2 more characters out of the blue, when we haven't heard/seen anything from the guy who was "trying to get into the big money game" on the date with Caroline Pao. Only one story line has had any movement and that was left with a giant question mark (the Borana and JenB match) - what were the details for "up the bet" remark?
I will say the audio at the bar with bartender and the guy Jen/Borana were playing for was unusually low-fi.
I'm still curious to see what happens and I'll continue to be. I'd love to watch this series grow and mature along the way. Hopefully you can pull out the valuable criticisms from everyone and continue to improve.
Thanks
Well, this isn't about Jennifer Barretta, she is just playing a character. Even though some of the criticism is very mean from some people, sometimes there are things in it that make sense. Whether I can do it or not, is another thing.
I'm sure of one thing. If I asked 50 people how to do the workout scene, I would get 50 answers, and then 49 people would be mad cause it wasn't done the way they would do it.
Jenn has no problem with the scene and I wanted something interesting for people to watch while the credits were coming on.
I do appreciate your comments and if I can take it, I will keep listening.
Hopefully you will like the next ones.
Thanks,
Jim
I will say that the opening does 2 things: 1) It shows the dedication JenB has to working out, which is nice. 2) It tells me that JimM needs to just go head and shoot some softcore porn and get it out of his system. I mean, I like looking at women as much as the next guy, but I kept thinking "I wonder how Jen feels about this sequence." I'm not against objectification of women - IF that's what you're going for.
But if you're trying to show a workout routine, in an attempt to add depth to the character, close-ups on her hips from all angles doesn't really do it. If you're trying for sex appeal, then do it blatantly and then you can do it with some classy aspects (a sexy dress, or her getting ready for a date - like any of the hollywood movies would tease the audience with flesh). This voyeuristic/staring-from-across-the-room deal just makes it feel creepy.
Also, while I appreciate trying to build another sub-story into the plotline, it's too early to bring in 2 more characters out of the blue, when we haven't heard/seen anything from the guy who was "trying to get into the big money game" on the date with Caroline Pao. Only one story line has had any movement and that was left with a giant question mark (the Borana and JenB match) - what were the details for "up the bet" remark?
I will say the audio at the bar with bartender and the guy Jen/Borana were playing for was unusually low-fi.
I'm still curious to see what happens and I'll continue to be. I'd love to watch this series grow and mature along the way. Hopefully you can pull out the valuable criticisms from everyone and continue to improve.
Well, this isn't about Jennifer Barretta, she is just playing a character. Even though some of the criticism is very mean from some people, sometimes there are things in it that make sense. Whether I can do it or not, is another thing.
I'm sure of one thing. If I asked 50 people how to do the workout scene, I would get 50 answers, and then 49 people would be mad cause it wasn't done the way they would do it.
Jenn has no problem with the scene and I wanted something interesting for people to watch while the credits were coming on.
I do appreciate your comments and if I can take it, I will keep listening.
Hopefully you will like the next ones.
Thanks,
Jim
Well, this isn't about Jennifer Barretta, she is just playing a character. Even though some of the criticism is very mean from some people, sometimes there are things in it that make sense. Whether I can do it or not, is another thing.
I'm sure of one thing. If I asked 50 people how to do the workout scene, I would get 50 answers, and then 49 people would be mad cause it wasn't done the way they would do it.
Jenn has no problem with the scene and I wanted something interesting for people to watch while the credits were coming on.
I do appreciate your comments and if I can take it, I will keep listening.
Hopefully you will like the next ones.
Thanks,
Jim
I would think that if you asked 50 people wanting to see a movie about pool, they would rather see her working out on a pool table doing drills or warming up for a match. Atleast I would. Just my opinion...
WOW!!!! I'm not even going to waste my time trying to explain this shit!!! Jim nice attempt I can see where your going, keep working and it will all come together.
Black Cat
Black Cat