A funny Story I thought I'd share

[Cane]

Two stories...

Was just playing cheap 8-Ball in a local bar and had one guy losing 8 ball pretty bad. He shoots 100 miles an hour and can't make a ball in a 5 gallong bucket. So, he's racking again and he takes the two back corner balls and puts them on the side of the rack between the 2nd and 3rd balls. I asked him what the f@#k he's doing and he says "Crown Rack! I can do that if I want to... it's in the Hoyle Book of Rules on Bar Pool." (where can I buy that book! LOL) I quit him at that point, he's mad, tell him that I feel bad and offer his money back... he's even more mad... I walk away from the table, after saying something to him about not being the greenest leaf on the tree, and he finally shuts up. Later, a friend comes over laughing and tells me the guys telling his friends "yeah, that big guy aint such a hustler... he didn't even know about the crown rack rule". I just laugh, continue on with my dual purpose quest to drink the county dry of Guiness Stout and to take the little blonde bartender home. Ended up living with the b!tch!!! For a few weeks... Wish I'd just kept on playing the Crown Rack guy!

Had a guy come in to my pool room not long before we closed it. He comes back to the room and is talking to me behind the booth, has a SportCraft cue in his hands, no case, and says he's looking for a money game. I say "I'm light action, what do you wanna do?" He's says, "You name it. I'll play for anything". Well, I don't want to run him off, so I suggest short rack banks, $20 a game. He says "Well, before you play me, I'm gonna tell you up front... First off, you don't want to play me bank pool. I can bank the 8 in every time" (I'm just sitting here smiling) He continues "Second, I went on this road trip up to Minnesota last year and beat Minnesota Fats 20 straight games. You really don't want to gamble $20 a game with me, cause you'll lose everything you own if I'm shootin' good."

Well, I back down! Whew! This guy is magical, right? I say. "Yeah, you're right. Anyone that can cross dimensions and beat a dead man 20 racks is outta my league"

His reply, with a puzzled look on his face "Whut?"

I say, "Fats has been DEAD for years, and he wasn't from Minnesota anyways..."

He gets mad and announces that Fats isn't dead, that he lives in Chicago! (but the guy just told me he played poor dead Rudolf in Minnesota) He's obviously angry by now and says he'll play me for a buck-a-rack 8 ball all I want. I laughed and told him if he needed money that bad, I'd pay him a dollar a rack just to rack for me while I practice. He leaves mad, and never came back.

Bob

 

[Colin Colenso]

When chalking to "impress" someone, I grab the cube in my left hand, jam it into the tip, then stick out my right arm straight and upward a little with the butt of the cue in that hand. Then I let the cuestick roll down my right arm back toward my face as it spins in the chalk. If I do it loosely enough, it sounds like a duck call. Sometimes I even lower my right arm and let it roll back towards my hand and then repeat the process. It looks and sounds really dorky.

Jeff Livingston

Are you for real Jeff?...that sounds rooooly cool

I have a few cue spin habits and also kind of let the cue slide down my hand and catch it just before it hits the ground that look kind of smooth. It's a kind of habit from spending thousands of hours holding a cue and mucking around. A bit like the way poker players mess with the clay chips I guess. Almost subconscious.

 

[BRKNRUN]

Some more "tells"

I am not really a gambler, unless it's a sure thing and this pretty much fell into that catagory...

I was a fish myself at the time, but I came accross an obviously much bigger fish.

I had just gotten into pool and was just far enough into the game that I had purchased my first cue...(It was a Adams that I wish I still had)

Anyway...I had gone to a golf course that I used to work at for some range practice. I ran accross a fellow co worker that used to work there also... Lo and behold we ended up playing a 7-up game on the putting green...I beat him 5 straight games for $10 a game. After the 5th game he made the comment..."This is not how I make money, I make money playing pool"....

I told him that I was learning the game and that I had just got my own cue....He said "Yeah I have my own cue, it's in the car" He proceeded to get the cue out of his car to let me inspect it...As I pulled the cue out of the Kmart special red polyester case, I noticed it was a cue that had a "screw on tip" ....As I looked at the cue, (and tightened his loose tip) he said..."You are going to have to give me a chance to win my $50.00 back"

I replied..."How about tonight"..........

Funny thing was...I could barely run 3 balls at the time.......But lucky for me he kept missing the 7 or 8 ball all night long...

 

[chefjeff]

Are you for real Jeff?...

(snip)

Uh oh...you're the second person to ask me that in the last two days...I'd better check my premises.

Jeff Livingston

 

[XMit]

New one...just last night.

I meet up with my girlfriends friend and her fiance'. Guy spends twenty minutes telling me that his McD shaft cost 299 bucks. Then he proceeds to show me a neat looking little McD with nice inlay work and a stacked leather wrap. He tells me the whole package with the case (butt and two shafts one turned down to 12mm) cost him only 250 bucks, but the whole thing was worth like 1600 bucks (fish like to brag about how expensive their cues are, I notice) So I ask him how he gets such a sweet deal, his answer:

My Brother knows the guy that PAINTS all the designs on McDermott's cues and he hooked me up with it.

So I say "you mean that one guy PAINTS (snicker) all of the cues that McDermott makes", guy says "yeah he's been working there for like five years."

So he looks at my merry widow Jacoby that I happened to be playing with that night and says "who made your cue". So I tell him and he says "I woulda got a 50 dollar cue like that if I didn't like the PAINT work in the designs on my STICK"


My girlfriend got pissed cuz I wouldn't stop laughing and saying "PAINT WORK" under my breath all the way home in the car.



XMit<------------likes the PAINT WORK on his $50 Jacoby

 

[rackem]

Budwieser Sneaky

I read a post about how someone got ahold of a budwiser cue and changed out the joint and made a new shaft for it...lol. Talk about a "hustler"!

Yeah I seen one Dave Whitsell did put a unilock joint on it and one of his own shafts. Spray it with six coats of clear. Change the red cloth wrap to a nice straight black irish linen. It Hit and looked good. I think he got $250 for it?

 

[fred_in_hoboken]

"You know, it's the strangest thing, ever since I but in those tri-angle wood thingies, people haven't been able to stop useing them."

A friend and I were watching a guy warm up at a tournament. He was bending way over the table, and using his fore arms instead of the triangle wood thingie, and getting a pretty decent rack.

My friend commented "would you be a little intimidated by a guy who can do that?"

"Nah. I dunno - it seems like he has a lot of practice racking."

 

[telkwa]

goddamn that was hilarious wally. im bored while my grade 9 math class is writing a test - but i couldn't keep from giggling outlad from time to time
they thought i was crazy

 

[rogelioii]

that's hilarious.... )

I didn't know placing the chalk upside down on the table was a banger move.. I used to do that all the time, mainly because I didn't want my shirt to get dirty (was lazy to move the chalk elsewhere on the rail when i leaned forward on my shots). Now, I'm only half a banger... I put down the chalk sideways so neither table nor shirt gets dirty.

 

[rogelioii]

I've always called it (and still do) a triangle..... From my observations, the filipinos called them triangles (instead of racks) too.....

 

[PopAndSlop]

28. Budweiser cue. Or better, "My buddy sold me this Budweiser cue for only $150 dollars!"

Hey I sold a Bud cue I won to someone for 150$ lol. I only thought he was a sucker then, now I KNOW he was a sucker.