Laura .... Hardly ever is pool played without an ego, especially by younger guys. Ever hear of sharking? Where do you think that arose from? ... <laughing>
As you get older and have played a lot, especially in big tournaments or money games, you learn to put your ego aside more, and use your brain more to accomplish your goal of winning the match. There is much more to winning than just making a ball, but that is the ever first step to winning everytime. What is the difference? Well, it's the difference between a 7.1 and 7.9, an 8.1 and 8.9, etc.. I shoot you guys all the time that are considered my skill level, but they only beat me 1 oir 2 times out of 10, because I have experience, knowledge about the game, and know how to come out the winner (able to focus in on their weak spots and use them against them).