What would you do?

RBLilly

RBLilly

AzB Silver Member
Silver Member
Hey here is a perplexing question.

If you and your wife played on two leagues together. One bar league on Wed. 7' tables, where you all were on the same team with like 8 other players (Supposidly our friends.) Then one 8' table league on Thurs. that you were on different teams (and all the other 8 people from your Wed league play in this one on different teams.) How would you handle this situation?

We were all at my house on a Sat night and when everyone left me and the wife got into a verbal fight pretty bad.

Well on Tuesday I get an e mail from the captain of the bar league that says she doesn't want any drama on the league so I can't play until me and the wife get things straightened out later.

So I ask her if my wife is allowed to play, and she said yes, they just didn't want me to show up and cause drama. So my wife (being pissed at me says she is going to go play league and defend my honor by telling them that I shouldn't have been kicked off.) Well being pissed at me I doubt she defended me, but that is besides the point. If they didn't want drama why didn't we both get kicked off? Me and the Wife never fight in public anyway, so they didn't have anything to worry about. Also, since it is at a bar, what would have prevented me from showing up and causing a scene anyway?

I got royally pissed thinking that they should have kicked both of us off if they didn't want drama. I think they chose sides, and by doing that invited more drama in.

Anyway I am mad at the wife for going cause I think she should have stuck by me and said if he can't play then I am not playing, but apparently she is cool with it since they took sides.

The minute she walked out the door to play I picked up my cues and headed down to a different place to play in a tournament. If she was going to have fun, then why shouldn't I? Of course when my wife got home and I wasn't sulking on the couch she got pissed that I went out to play without her. LOL Oh well, her plan didn't work very good did it? LOL

Anyway, now they want me to show up and play this week, and to tell you the truth I am still pissed and don't even know if I should ever play for their team. All the other friends we associate with don't take sides, they just give us advice on how to work it out. And they have never acted like mom and pop and tried to keep us in time out so to speak. So I don't know what to do or how to act.

I really love to play, and there are very few leagues around here, so I like to play in any league that I have gotten invited into.

What would you guys do? Need some good advice here please.
 
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It's kind of funny in a way. You seem more upset about how the relationship is affecting the pool league thing rather than the other way around. You may get a lot of sympathy around here.:D

The relationship comes first.

Suck it up and do the manly thing.

Make up with her somehow, even if ya gotta lie your ass off. ;)
 
I guess it depends . . .

Well I guess it really depends, is your wife or the league where you play on different teams more important to you? Do you look forward to hot meals and a friendly companion or is that league more important? How much is it going to cost you net if you really annoy your wife?

I suggest a coin toss and one of you quitting the league where you are on opposite teams or both quitting.

Hu
 
Lol

It's not the league that we are on opposite teams that is the problem. That is my Thurs.

Since she is not on my team there, no body can kick me off.

Since we are on the same team on Wed. nights she got their sympathy and they kicked me off until her and I can straighten things out.

Her and I are on good terms now, and they want me to come back tomorrow and play since I am one of the better players, but I feel kind of jaded now that they thought I was going to start crap in public anyway.

I mean they aren't our parents, so they should have left it alone and let her and I worry about it. I mean if either one of us thought that something was going to happen, we just wouldn't have shown up.

However they told me not to come, and told her to show up. Like that wasn't supposed to upset me.

So I am torn as to whether or not they are worthy of me playing on their team tomorrow night. Or should I just say to heck with all of them.

As far as me and the wife I ain't worried about that, we are cool now, and we are working on our differences anyway.

My wife knew I wouldn't have started anything in public, but instead of telling them hey that isn't cool she got all happy, and was like well they didn't kick me off, and they think we need some space. So she went and played in the league without me. (The league we are both on the same team.)

Like I said I just said to hell with it and went and played in a tournament anyway. She couldn't believe I didn't stay home and sulk about not being on the team though. I thought that was the funnest part.

Anyway, like I was saying they are wanting me back now, and I don't know if I should come back. If they were really friends, and cool people then they would have told us both not to come play for a while, not just one of us. I would think if they cared about us this is what they would have done. I guess that shows who they like, but when your friends with a married couple your supposed to be friends with the couple, not just one or the other. So to me that is jacked up.

Now that she isn't fighting with me, they are like he can come back. (Yea only because they don't want her to quit playing, and because my wife and I are the two best people on that team.)

Just my thoughts, but I don't really know. Would any of you all go back to playing on their league?
 
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league is for fun

League is for fun. If you aren't having fun don't go. I'd go play with them a night and see how you feel. If you don't feel comfortable tell them you have decided that you like the tournament that you shot the night you were banned better and will be playing it in the future. Might as well let them think they are hoisted on thier own petard if you leave. ;)

Hu
 
TXPLSHRK,

IF it was me, I would just tell them, well you kicked me off the team or didnt want me to show up. So I found something else to do on that nite aka the tournament.

Or you can show up, and dump your match. Or just tell them hey you didnt want me to show up, so I'm not showing up. you Reap what you sew.

Plus, just think if you place in the tournament, you can brag about the money you made while playing in the tournament :D

dave
 
txplshrk said:
Hey here is a perplexing question.

If you and your wife played on two leagues together. One bar league on Wed. 7' tables, where you all were on the same team with like 8 other players (Supposidly our friends.) Then one 8' table league on Thurs. that you were on different teams (and all the other 8 people from your Wed league play in this one on different teams.) How would you handle this situation?

We were all at my house on a Sat night and when everyone left me and the wife got into a verbal fight pretty bad.

So how do your friends know that you and the wife had a problem. Sounds like someone is putting your personal business in the street?? That is what caused the problem! I hope all works out okay. By the way, How did you do in the tournament?
Click to expand...
 
I sorta think pool is like a friend who steals your money and cheats on you. I don't see how they kicked you off, especially if you are one of the better players LOL. Weds, must be just for fun huh, my team is all about winning. I wouldn't go back to the team, not after that. Especially if they just want you back as you and your wife are the backbone of the team.
 
Yea,

Well yes after we fought she told all those people on our Wed. night league. I didn't go out and tell anyone. So of course they just got her side of the story, and that is what led to them taking her side and kicking me off the team.

Pool had nothing to do with why I got kicked off the team, and it is like I said earlier. We have never had a fight or a disagreement in public. We save that for at home behind closed doors.

If I had made a scene at the bar then ok, I understand and kick me off the team. If I was a S#$@ talker to the other team, and you thought that was inappropriate, then ok kick me off the team. But this had nothing to do with the team, and that is what bothered me the most. Why didn't they see how we acted that night at league, then if there was a problem they could have kicked me off.


So yea I got a little mad, to me I think my wife did it and told them to take me off the team cause she knows that is my only hobby, and the only thing that I care about as much as her. (Ok maybe I care about pool more!!! LOL I am just kidding there. I care about her more just slightly. LOL.)

Anyway, since I figured that is what was going on I didn't let it get to me and I shot that tournament.

By the way I was one of the last 4 in the tournament. Probably would have done better my first game and not gotten in the loosers bracket so early if I wasn't still mad at my wife while I was shooting. LOL

Anyway, I was thinking about telling them I have some where else to shoot just cause I think it would be rubbing it in their faces sort of.

I mean I wouldn't have to say anything except I am shooting somewhere else on Wed now. Then they would be like damn we lost our best player, why did we ever cut him. (At least I would hope they would think that, but who knows right? They might think yea we got rid of him, and now we can just hang out with his wife cause we don't like him anyway. LOL)

Truthfully everyone on our team shoots good, and are pretty consistent. This league is for fun, and since it is on bar boxes there aren't that many great players in this league if you know what I mean.

The thing is they could probably be in the top 3 teams without me or the wife playing. It's just when you add me and the wife they confirm they are in the top three.

No one in this league had seen me play before, and the first break out of the box I put the eight in the side, and went and sat down. They were like damn who is this guy. (All luck, but I acted like I meant to do it.)

Then the next game I racked he broke and I ran everything but the eight. It was locked on his stripes, and I messed up the break out. But then he broke it out and on my next shot I won.

So now people in the league know I can play.

Oh well it is a dilema, and I am waiting to see if they ask again today.

Thanks for your support guys, I knew pool players would understand.
 
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Can you start your own Team for next session?

If you can, you should start recruiting and put a killer team together that will BBQ the other teams.:)

Sorry, this is how my mind works.:D
 
You've got 2 problems, one with your wife, one with the pool team.
As far as the wife goes I don't think you're asking for advice and I wouldn't give it if you were.
As far as the pool team goes, quit them and find another team. You're right, they should have bumped you both or neither of you. IMO.
 
Next Season

Yea I could start a team for next season, but it has like 17 weeks until we are done.

Yes you are correct, I am not asking advice about the wife. Her and I have to work those problems out.

I was just asking about playing pool on their team, and what the people in here would do.

Seems like most in here are telling me to forget their team and start my own, so maybe I should play in tournaments all season, and start my own team next season that will crush all other teams. LOL

Like I said, I knew pool players would understand my train of thought, and I appreciate all the comments.

Thanks all of you.
 
Am I the only one trying to figue out the problem here?

Two pool team, one with, one without your wife.

You argue with your wife, in private, and get kicked off a pool team for it?

Is there a big piece to the story I'm missing here?
 
You got it

Nope your not missing anything.

On Wed we are on the same team. (We play other bars every week.)

On Thursday we are in same league, but on different teams. (everyone plays at the same pool hall there are like 10 - 12 teams normally.)

Other than that you got the story Gregg.
 
Personally, I think your pool team ought to stay out of your personal life in the first place, regardless of what your wife said to them.

Find a new team. You don't need them if that's how they're going to treat you.

Barbara
 
I went back and reread your original post.

I think it's wrong for a goup of people to take sides, like you said.

Maybe you have to ask what their reasoning was before blowing your stack, or even letting them know that you were upset with the group in any way.

Likewise, you ask "Is the team worthy of my play?"

Whoa, take it easy, it's just a bar league. Some people look at league night as a fun night out with some pool thrown in, and nothing more. Not you or me, but that's really how some feel. You have to view things from their perspective. You, like me, seem to put much more importance, energy into your game.

Anyways, my point is that you really need to find out what was going on with the team. If people don't have a logical, rational explanation as to why your wife was asked to come out and not yourself, then I would start to be concerned.
 
Personally, I think everyone overlooked a very important piece to this puzzle.

txplshrk said:
Well on Tuesday I get an e mail from the captain of the bar league that says she doesn't want any drama on the league so I can't play until me and the wife get things straightened out later.

So I ask her if my wife is allowed to play, and she said yes, they just didn't want me to show up and cause drama.
Click to expand...

More than likely the team captain identified with your wife, and wanted to get her out of the house, maybe to talk to her, maybe to prove a point to you, who knows.

They didn't get the full story, and you chose not to give it to them. And from what I've seen, they didn't kick you off, they just asked you to fix things at home first. Granted, they could have asked you both to stay home, but again, (And here comes the part that will get me flamed) we're talking about women. They are going to stick together no matter what. (Well except if they arrive to a party wearing the same dress, but that's a different story entirely.) Shake it off man, and enjoy the game. Try league night again, and if you can't get past it and have fun, then go back to the tournament. Don't let the (wo)Man get you down.

JMO,
~Shakes
 
Which ...

do you like more - Pool or Sex? (yeah, me neither). Well, which do you need more right now? .... lol

You never did state what the issue was that you and your wife disagreed on?
Was it because you criticized her playing?

Unless you like doing your own laundry, cooking your own meals, constantly hearing cupboard doors slammed, and not getting any p****, you better compromise in some fashion ............ or it will ruin your Pool game .... lol
 
I might have read your first post wrong in my last response. I thought you were still fueding a bit with the wife.

They say there is a fine line between comedy and tradgedy, but in this case, it certainly ain't no tradgedy. You seem justified in any course of action you choose. Don't let other people's mistakes define you. Whatever you decide, I would recommend doing it with a smile and a sense of humor.

Your situation is kinda funny, you have to admit. :)
 
Grant her an uncontested divorce.

You keep the JD cue with the screw on tip.

She doesn't deserve anyone who would put their personal problems on a message board.

Jake
 
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