Words of Encouragement

murdoc23

murdoc23

AzB Silver Member
Silver Member
Sorry for the strange thread, but I could really use some help. The past couple of weeks I've been the only person on my league team winning. Some times it's just been bad luck for the other players, sometimes they've just been "off". Well being the introvert that I am, I never quite know what to say to folks to try and make them feel better, and this week I really put my foot in my mouth and pissed off a teammate. :o

So, any suggestions on words of encouragement you could suggest for when your teammates are down, slumping hard, or just seeing red?

Best I can come up with so far is "you'll get em next time." Or is the best thing to just STFU?
 
Last edited:
murdoc23 said:
Sorry for the strange thread, but I could really use some help. The past couple of weeks I've been the only person on my league team winning. Some times it's just been bad luck for the other players, sometimes they've just been "off". Well being the introvert that I am, I never quite know what to say to folks to try and make them feel better, and this week I really put my foot in my mouth and pissed off a teammate. :o

So, any suggestions on words of encouragement you could suggest for when your teammates are down, slumping hard, or just seeing red?

Best I can come up with so far is "you'll get em next time." Or is the best thing to just STFU?
Click to expand...

Buy off your teammates opponent next week, make sure they sell a good win.
 
Next game, allow yourself to get beat 10 - 0.
Come back to the table and say, "see, I'm shooting just as crappy as you guys are".
 
How bout:

"hey you're really improving, you sucked a lot less this week compared to last week"

just kidding.

Hopefully things will turn aroundfor your team mates.

SLIM
 
Can you get your team out playing before the next match? Get them a little table time without pressure and remind them how much fun the game is?
It's easier to have fun when you're winning, and it's easier to win when you're having fun.
 
When you win, "bad luck". When you lose, "well played". That's it.

What really pisses me off is people that don't even acknowledge you as an opponent, the types that just talk about themselves and their game. I play someone as deluded as they come - wannabe pro, a superstar in his own mind, but universally mocked and ridiculed for his patent lack of natural ability - who I've beaten 9-1 and 9-3 in the last two matches, with his response being he "threw it away". There's never any appreciation about how you've played, or even acknowledgment that you actually exist.

I know single-mindedness is a necessary trait for the more advanced player, but I know many players that are certifiably insane when it comes to assessing their own abilities.
 
Like you I tend to be an introvert but one who knows how to get along socially as required. Here are a few tricks I have learned over the years with out being condescending.

Self effacing humor works well. Pointing out my own weaknesses and foibles helps others see that I usually laugh at myself.

Finding the good intentions in what others do. Sure they miss but damn that position was good.

I find that when I interrupt negative people with positive comments others in the group don’t say anything but they appreciate the idea. I was able to turn around the team’s attitude with this simple counter move. People on the team who complained all the time knew I was going to call them on it (albeit it politely and with humor) so they quit complaining and looking like a sourpuss.

No one likes a phony and we are all good at identifying the phony comments so I look for those things I sincerely appreciate. Most people enjoy a good joke and I often bring a joke or two with me to help lighten the mood.

Over time you become known for the type of characteristics you usually exhibit, so how do you want to be known? I am the guy who always plays fair, laughs at himself, has a joke or two, and tries to find the good in other people.

There is an old trick from the self assertive movement that works quite well. Apologize to the aggressor and ask what you can do to help make his mood better. This usually elicits an apology and a changed mood. For instance, the cashier at the grocery store is throwing your stuff around and acting like a jerk. In the middle of their tirade stop them and ask if there is something you did wrong that made them angry. This usually elicits a comment about their boss, bad mood or whatever. More importantly they straighten up and treat you more politely. This works nearly every time.
 
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