You might be a ballbanger if...

if you swing your cue like tom cruise in the color of money

if you scoop the ball in attempt of a jump shot

if you think you're a world champ b/c you can jump a ball with a bunjee cue

if you think that minnesota fats was a world champion

if you walk into a pool room and ask for change of a dollar to put into the table

if you think your balabushka that you ordered online is worth thousands

if you think there was really a balabushka in the color of money

if you think that playing 8 hours a day will actually yield you financial success

if you think that rails are your pockets spot is the stone cold nuts

if you don't know what the stone cold nuts are
 
You chalk your tip and ferrule at the same time
Try and start a campfire chalking up
You think the diamond system is part of a pyramid scam....
 
When asked if you're looking for action, you immediately worry about STDs.

You LOVE wild, four rail banks that end in a multiple combination shot. You further believe that if you made the ball, you intended it all along. If someone else made it, it might be luck, or they might be a true- blue hustler from the movies.

"Almost" is just as good for your pride as is actually making the ball.

Knocking balls off of the table is absolutely hilarious.

Speed- rolling balls into each other with your hands, while your buddy does the same on the other side of the table, is just as much fun as playing properly. It's also a fun way to end the night, if your buddy is trying to put the balls away while you play "keep away".

You think you look sexy when you shoot, and every shot is not so much an opportunity to make a ball, but to show off the good view.
 
if you admire the league shooters who wear gloves :)

if you shoot behind the back

if you tell people you usually shoot much better than this

if you always shoot offensively
 
If you are playing in your local weekly tournament, and ask your opponent if you are allowed a "time-out".

If you save those "9 On The Snap" patches.

If you ask your house pro if he can put a layered tip on cue...and then unscrew the ferrule and hand it to him.

Steve
 
If you give the 8 a spin while racking, you use half a bottle of baby powder to insure your graphite cue doesn't get sticky, everytime someone makes an easy bank you hollar at the top of your lungs, "not hard enough" is your best advice, you think that it's part of the game to crouch behind the pocket and make stupid faces, you feel that it's ok to whistle as long as it's not (exactly) when your opponent is shooting or you grab the rack and start collecting balls because "the rest are easy".
 
You Might be a ballbanger if..............


You enjoy watching BallBangers over any Pro Event on TV.

You watched " The Color Of Money " for the first time, and then went to the pool hall to become a Hustler.

You get caught up in a game 8ball for 100$ a game and you get 4balls off the table.

You think your Steve Mizerack cue is just as good as a Schon

You Think stroking your shaft is something you do for pleasure

You think cuz the cueball went 4 rails at 100mph and happen to end up behind another ball thats a saftey.

You think shooting as hard as you can will make the balls go in the pocket better.

You drill for oil when chalking your cue
 
If you use a cuestick for a flagpole, you might be a redneck banger.

If your pool table is covered with dirty hunting clothes, you might be a redneck banger.

If you take the time to read meaningless threads on billiard boards, AND ACTUALLY RESPOND TO THEM, you ARE a banger, dude!...get a life!

Jeff Livingston
 
You Might be a ballbanger if..............

you think playing the ghost is wearing a white sheet on halloween :eek:
you think a loose rack is referring to a bra-less woman
 
Last edited:
Cane said:
if... you think the metal corner irons are made of metal so it will give you a good place to lay your cigarette/cigar while shooting
Click to expand...

I set up a 10' Gold Crown snooker table that had ASH TRAYS on each pocket. Litterally. In the metal peices. The sad thing is it use to belong to a boys and girls club and was used heavily.

You might be a Ball Banger if your pool hall hands you your beer tab and a seperate Refelting tab.
 
You might be a Ball Banger if ...
Click to expand...

... if you think you lose if you scratch breaking 8-ball.

... if you every acted like you actually meant that two-rail bank.

... if you twirl the rack.

... if you ever used a winter glove as a shooting glove.

... if you roll the house cue and don't check the tip.

... if you picked up and then dropped a bar table to get the cue ball out.

... if you ever shattered a table light when you broke.

... if you think going around the world is a story lasting 80 days.

... if you think a back cut needs neosporine.

... if you think the 50-yard line only happens in football.

... if you think you get better draw by pulling your cue back real fast.

yeah, that's too many already...

-td
 
OMG... i just had to bump this post because i was in tears after having read it! this was by far one of the funniest posts i have ever read on here...

some of my favorites included...

... if you twirl your cue around like tom cruise in the color of money
... if you thought a moori medium was a condom
... if you thought you lost by scratching on the break in eight ball
... if you ask the house pro to put on a new layered tip and then screw off your ferule and hand it to him

these were great!
 
And

If you show up in Cowboy outfit, hat, and boots.

If someone walks up and says, 'And this is the Challenge table'.
 
~~~If U join the UPA, lose every single match U ever played but get points for going 2 N outt, then try to pass UR self off as a 'ranked UPA touring pro' :D

Brian
 
-A “break and run” for you is when you snap a house cue and the owner of the pool hall chases your as$ down the block.
-If ya play at the speed of Danny Basivich, (but not the skill level) and someone labels you a slow poker-choker.
-If the only time you have a good stroke, is during a solo sexual fantasy.
-If the only time you get to poke something is when your cue tip meets the cue ball.
-When a two ball run causes you to have an orgasm.
-When the boys in your pool room want the owners to replace the cloth, they get you to demonstrate a masse shot.
Your pool playing is like a Middle East experience where you say “Iraq” and your opponent says “Iran.”
-If you have re-occurring nightmare’s that you’re an extra in the movies Jaw’s and under relentless Shark attacks.
-When you can’t even pull of a simple jump shot with an X-Breaker.
-A bank shot for you is when some thieves are pulling of an armed robbery at your corner bank.
-When you favorite soft drink is a C+.
When you’re in perfect health and your opponent hands you a cough candy and says to you, “Stop your hacking.”
When your pal’s at the pool hall all chip in and by you a Sardo rack for Christmas.
When your pool instructor performs the hiemlick maneuver on you to help you stop our choking.
When a race to three takes you and your identical twin over two hours to complete.


RJ
 
Oh No........................

You might be a banger if ......

You think having "the dead nuts" means you cant get it up -:eek:
 
When you ask your opponent if they have poison ivy when they quietly bring out a bottle of Calamine lotion after your last scratch.

Barbara~~~psssst!! Hey 9balllvr!!:eek: :D :rolleyes:
 
or...

... you take the balls from the ball return and send them down table to your buddy to rack
... you still can't fully understand the rule of 9-ball..."what do you mean whoever hits the nine in wins??!?!?"
...you walked into a pool hall WITH YOUR OWN STICK and somehow managed to walk out with no money... you just can't understand how it happened... you HAD YOUR OWN STICK
... you tried to use the cue chalk to chalk your own hand cause your fiberglass cue is making it sweat...


thats all for now...
 
As the initiator of this thread I herby rename the thread to

“You might shoot like Willie if …”

please mentally transpose that phrase for

“You might be a ballbanger if …”

Thank You
 
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