best pool one liners

Those of you who have ever spent any time around Trinididians will best appreciate this immortal line uttered by my boy Trini while we were emptying out a room in Aruba:

"Oh God, boy...dey gon' bus' me money clip!"

My second favorite comes from an older guy, Jim, an excellent player who always gave good advice while hitting balls with Poolbum, Cornerman and I in the UMass student center way back in the day: "I'm gonna tie a string around your head and tie the other end to your balls....let's see how long you keep jumping up on the stroke then!
 
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BWColeman said:
In my time around pool halls all over i have heard some of the most colorful and funny one-liners from people in the pool hall. Could we all share some of our favorites ?

For me My Favorite I ever heard " Of course he will gamble his pockets are Axel deep to a ferris wheel "
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Danny DiLiberto referring to Johnny Irish. "The longer he is dead, the better he plays".
 
overheard in pool hall

i dont know why but i find this funny, guys are talking about money, " my shoes cost more than your education "

guys talking about a spot one guy gives in and says " ok, you can use 2 pieces of chalk and i will only use 1 "
 
I read this one one here I think last year when someone was referring to a snooker player ... It went something like "he's a nice guy but when it comes to crazy he gives earl the 7"


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After a guy misses a easy shot tell him" playing like that will get you sleeping in the streets".
If he is going to try a stupid shot in 1P that will sell out if he misses," if your even thinking about that shot your not playing for enough money".
Smitty
 
"If you are going to sweat me that bad at least have the common decency to give me a gatoraid and a towel!"
- I still laugh about this one...

"Hes in a bad game, but if he wins he could end up busting the whole room!"
- and he almost did...

"You want the breaks? I will give you all the breaks you want, about one every hour so you can freshen up."

"if you arent going to try then I dont even want to play"
- when opponent misses an easy shot

"He couldnt run out of the building if it was on fire."
 
Best Pool One Liners

I have heard a lot of one liners over the years, here are a few of my favorites:

Keith McCready: Upon arriving at the tournament room he proudly stated " My name is Dr. McCready and I'm here to perform surgery."

Ronnie Allen: Playing one pocket he tells his opponent, " Let's play mum pool, go sit down shut up and the only noise we'll hear is the sound of balls I'm making going in the pocket."

Unknown Player: Two guys playing $5 nine ball, guy loses and says, "you got change for a twenty? Good, now I owe you twenty five."
 
I knew I had to give up taking speed when I jumped the table on the lag.
 
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A guy walking into the bar with his own cue or my buddy's and I walk into a bar and see a guy using his own cue. "Do you smell what I smell... MONEY"
 
My boy Mike

one of my best friends and road partner back in the day Mike F. told a guy i stuck in Houston one night


" Just call him Lint, because he is Deeep in your Pocket"
 
Player getting beat soundly says:
"When I get in stroke I'll bust you"
Opponent:
"I've been waiting twenty years, how much longer is it gonna take?"
 
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guy ask old man for advise on his pool game, old man says

take two weeks off from pool, then quit altogether.
 
pool one liner's

Guy asks, how much can we bet. Told him, stand on your head and turn your pockets inside out.:)
 
Trinidad......

VIProfessor said:
Those of you who have ever spent any time around Trinididians will best appreciate this immortal line uttered by my boy Trini while we were emptying out a room in Aruba:

"Oh God, boy...dey gon' bus' me money clip!"

My second favorite comes from an older guy, Jim, an excellent player who always gave good advice while hitting balls with Poolbum, Cornerman and I in the UMass student center way back in the day: "I'm gonna tie a string around your head and tie the other end to your balls....let's see how long you keep jumping up on the stroke then!
Click to expand...

I lived in Port of Spain, Trinidad for about 3 months in the late 1970s while installing some telecom equipment. I sent a postcard home to my wife and wrote (accidentally), " I`m having a great time. Wish you were her."

Needless to say, she didn`t appreciate my humor.......:thumbup: :thumbup:

Will Prout
 
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My brother has always been a good shot maker, and when playing 9 ball, someone would always say, I can't believe you played that shot, and he would always say
No Guts No Glory.
 
after running back to back racks in 9 ball working on his 3rd misses the 7 and says "If was an Indian they would have called me ..Crooked Arrow":D
 
Grady to Billy: "Your'e best chance to defeat me...is to put something in my drink".
Billy to Grady: "No, my best chance to defeat you...is for you to show up".


After being up 7-0 in a race to 9...
Him: "Wanna see a miraculous comeback?"
Me: "Yea, I'd sure like to see that."
Him: "Alright then, I'll come back next week Saturday".
 
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