Ron:
I hear you. There are very few things more frustrating than an opponent that 1.) takes a long time deliberating over the table layout, then 2.) plays a safety anyway -- even when there's a very do-able [and rewarding] shot that he could take if he just buckled down on his cueing technique. E.g. a long shot, but if he makes it, he's rewarded with nearly automatic position for the next, or automatic position on an easy breakout ball into the pack. Instead, he deliberates for a long time, then plays a safety, gluing you to the pack or whatever. Grrr!!
The players I play with are not like that at all. Defense is one thing, but they definitely get called out on slow play. We like our 14.1 to have a cadence; a rhythm; even if the rhythm is a defensive shot. So I guess it's however those players were brought up in playing straight pool. We like to indoctrinate players here to engage brain cells immediately -- get those neurons firing -- commit to something, and then DO it. All in the span of what you'd expect when playing, say, 9-ball. The coffee pots here are constantly running, and the poolrooms I frequent make an excellent pot of NY coffee. We call it "journeyman juice."
Sadly, 14.1 is one of those games that is EASILY negatively affected by slow play. All it takes is one guy -- just one guy -- and the tension running through the night is so thick, you can cut it with a knife. Even players on other tables are affected, when Mr. SlowPlay is standing there at the table, contemplating, all the while blocking the aisle between his and the next table, holding up the other player.
I hope you decide not to abandon straight pool. Played right -- with a cadence -- it's one of the most rewarding games there is.
-Sean
<-- loves one pocket, too -- played the same way, with journeyman juice