Adam Buton snooker commentary
HAHAHA
He hates balls.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedy/clips/p004pnsr/adam_buxton_adam_buxtons_snooker_commentary/
Son asks Mom: "May I take our dog for a walk?" Mom: "I don't know. Daisy is in heat. Ask your dad."
Son to Dad: "May I take our dog for a walk? Mom said Daisy is in heat and I should ask you." Father takes a rag, soaks it with gasoline, scrubs Daisy's butt with it, and says: "You can go now but keep the dog on the leash!"
Son returns without any dog on the leash. Dad: "Where is Daisy?" Son: "Daisy ran out of gas about halfway down the street. But don't worry, another dog is pushing her home."