Gracious in victory, gracious in defeat

[JDB]

It seems to me, that certain players deem it a weakness to be gracious in defeat, rather than accept that your opponent out played you.
I myself feel as though I am a "good loser", but I am also very aware of being a modest winner when I do win.

As someone who plays decently, but is missing some pretty important ingredients to move to monster level do people think that having a slightly less friendly/polite demeanor would help lift my competitive edge?

Please note, I am not going to change I am just interested in what the general consensus is.

I try very hard to be gracious in victory as well as defeat. Victory is easy...lol. I am mostly successful in defeat, as well; however, there have been some times where I have not been so gracious and it really bothers me after the fact.

It doesn't matter how they won; ran out the set or got every roll possible. They won the match and they deserve to be able to "celebrate" their victory without having their opponent do or say something to minimize their victory.

I hate losing and replay the match in my head as to what I could have done differently for a whle. It really does bother me; however, I hate being a poor loser too.

You can be gracious in defeat and still not be happy with the loss; however, the loss is your problem not your opponents so why try to minimize his victory with your attitude?

 

[TheThaiger]

95% of the players I play make no mention of my game whatsoever, even if I've not given them a shot. Too many players are wrapped up in themselves only, and never stop talking about their game. Drives me nuts.

 

[RRfireblade]

95% of the players I play make no mention of my game whatsoever, even if I've not given them a shot. Too many players are wrapped up in themselves only, and never stop talking about their game. Drives me nuts.

So does texting the whole time they are at the table and not even realizing when its my shot. Then getting up and running out on them. I never realized how pissed off people get when they think you don't care at all and can still win.

 

[thommy]

So does texting the whole time they are at the table and not even realizing when its my shot. Then getting up and running out on them. I never realized how pissed off people get when they think you don't care at all and can still win.

another reason I hate texting

 

[Snapshot9]

Losing!

I try to be gracious in winning and in losing. When you have played as long as I have, you realize you are not going to win them all. I will compliment my opponent on a very difficult run out, and I always shake hands and tell them good match.

I review the match though in my head, and try to rationalize whether they won because they outplayed me, or whether I lost it because I did not play as well as I should have.

I am competitive though, and I hate to lose, but I try to overcome it the next time by being smart, and correcting any mistakes I made previously.

 

[AtLarge]

Golf is not a good example. You are not directly playing your opponent, you are only playing the course. Your opponents shots do not affect your shots. If you lose, it is only because you did not play the course as well as they did. Most other sports you are directly playing an opponent, wherein their performance directly correlates into yours.

It's a quote from one of the winningest coaches ever. He is a legend. You don't have to agree, but you can't disrespect him by saying what he has to say is baloney. There is a reason he is a legend, respect it.

If Lombardi's quote is applied to sports in general, I absolutely disagree with it. I don't, however, know the context of Lombardi's remark, so he may not have meant it in the way a lot of people continue to use it today.

If you don't like golf as a good example, how about pool -- Efren Reyes and Allison Fisher (and many, many others).

 

[measureman]

A couple of years ago in a end of league tournament with both my grown kids there I played a lady who was way,way below me in skill.
Well I messed up really bad and she beat me.
She was so happy that she went over to my kids and said "Your Father plays so good and I beat him and I feel so good" Now she said this in a very nice way, not trying to be mean but just on cloud nine. I was very nice to her and complimented on her fine play. Why rain on her moment.
Then I went out to her car and slashed her tires. Just kidding.

 

[DavidMNienow]

For as long as I have been playing I have tried to be gracious in both victory and defeat. I never express any complete physical excitement for any victory, but instead try to just take internal satisfaction for the victory. I try to never express any disapointment for a loss either.

I always shake the hand of my opponent before the match starts. And I try to always shake the hand of my opponent after the match. But there are a couple of local players that I have played lots against in tourny and league matches, and they have yet to ever shake my hand after the match is over and I have been the victor. When I win I offer my hand for a well played match and they just walk away.

And I have had lower ranked players who win they get the rare victory on me they have turned their victory into a major party celebration with their behavior. Really whooping it up at their end. And all I can do is just laugh at how how excited they have gotten for getting a victory over me. I have actually been asked to autograph a couple of "I Beat an 8 & 9" patches when a lower ranked APA player got a win off of me and they got their patch award for the victory. I just always consider those reactions a testament to the strength of my game as player.

 

[JC]

A couple of years ago in a end of league tournament with both my grown kids there I played a lady who was way,way below me in skill.
Well I messed up really bad and she beat me.
She was so happy that she went over to my kids and said "Your Father plays so good and I beat him and I feel so good" Now she said this in a very nice way, not trying to be mean but just on cloud nine. I was very nice to her and complimented on her fine play. Why rain on her moment.
Then I went out to her car and slashed her tires. Just kidding.

Almost every game I lose in BCA league play is the highlight of some one else's night/season. Funny it's usually the most unexpected folks who beat you and you can escape certain defeat from the more skilled ones time and again.

 

[thommy]

A couple of years ago in a end of league tournament with both my grown kids there I played a lady who was way,way below me in skill.
Well I messed up really bad and she beat me.
She was so happy that she went over to my kids and said "Your Father plays so good and I beat him and I feel so good" Now she said this in a very nice way, not trying to be mean but just on cloud nine. I was very nice to her and complimented on her fine play. Why rain on her moment.
Then I went out to her car and slashed her tires. Just kidding.

That is exactly what I was trying to say earlier on this thread. It may be a bummer for you guys who are good to lose, but imagine how you felt when you beat someone who you knew was way better than you:thumbup:

I still remember the first time i beat the owner of the bowling alley where i learned to play.

 

[measureman]

Almost every game I lose in BCA league play is the highlight of some one else's night/season. Funny it's usually the most unexpected folks who beat you and you can escape certain defeat from the more skilled ones time and again.

I played in a local 9 ball tournament and beat a women's professional player
5 to 4. I felt great that night. The next time we played some time later I said to her remember me-meaning do you know me. She said "You beat me "
Not what I meant at all,just was asking do you remember me.

 

[DonsSmidget]

As some of you know I am very new to pool. I am VERY good at being a gracious looser....... After all my favorite saying should be "Im a great racker!!!" Well funny thing this session......... I actually have my first winning session ever in 9ball (this is session three for me) and I actually have won more times this session than my last two combined.... anyway I digress. I am learning how to be a gracious winner as well. I always try and say something good to my opponent after the game doesn't matter if I win or lose, as I have found if I watch the game enough, (mine or anyone elses) I can learn from everyone. That to me being the most important thing at this stage in my game. I just want to learn... the winning is bonus but the learning is my goal at the moment