Play nice or play to win?

Sweet Marissa

Sweet Marissa

www.Bella-Muse.com
On Thursday nights, we have a group of young adults that meet at our church called Veritas. In our meeting room, we also have a game area where we socialise before worship. There we have, among other things, a pool table. Nothing fancy. It's an old eight foot with worn out red cloth and crappy balls.

There's one kid, Michael, in his early twenties, who wants to play me every week. When I do, I go easy on him, but only because it's church. It's kinda obvious (or it is to me). I also let him win sometimes.

I don't care about letting him or anyone win a few games because it's church. The only thing that gets me is his behaviour. He takes slop shots then claims he meant to make that shot (I chuckle and let it slide but a couple others call him out on it), protests profusely if I get ball in hand, and tries to shark me when I'm up (I ignore it). When he "wins", he's all around the room bragging about how I'm his biggest opponent and he beat me, happier than a kid at Christmas. When I win, I shake his hand or give him a hug and take my seat.

It obviously means a lot to him, but he's just so frikkin obnoxious about it and, to be honest, it's pretty annoying. But I don't want to be mean. I guess my question is, would I be a bad person if I didn't let him win these games?
 
Sweet Marissa said:
It obviously means a lot to him, but he's just so frikkin obnoxious about it and, to be honest, it's pretty annoying. But I don't want to be mean. I guess my question is, would I be a bad person if I didn't let him win these games?
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Nope-Drill Him!
 
No ....

someone obviously needs to teach him 'a lesson'.

'If you aren't humble, down the road you will have a humbling experience'
 
Sweet Marissa said:
There's one kid, Michael, in his early twenties, who wants to play me every week. When I do, I go easy on him, but only because it's church. It's kinda obvious (or it is to me). I also let him win sometimes. I don't care about letting him or anyone win a few games because it's church. The only thing that gets me is his behaviour.
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JMO - have fun but always play to win.
 
I would drive the cue ball into his skull. Being that it's in church, I would do it at only medium-hard speed.
 
Early 20's is not a kid. Maybe if he was 10 you could cut him a break. He needs to be taught the rules and learn to play by them. Taking slop and lying about his intentions is not something you should allow him to get away with. Its church Just remind him God is watching! ;)
 
Based on his behavior, I say beat him every time ! It;s too late for him to grow up.
I love shooting pool with a woman that shoots good.
 
I agree - drill him as hard as you can. And - keep doing that 'til he figures it out. He won't get it right away.
 
Ditto - drill him, but on top of that try to come with an unflattering nickname and start calling him that. Like, "You lose again my little gameroom b*tch." :D
 
Not only that, but if pool is that important to him, then the only way he'll get better is if he never gets a break and is forced to learn by being beat... hundreds of times... just like the rest of us. Plus, if you're serious about playing, you should always play to win, taking every shot seriously, not ever losing concentration.
 
Yep. Race him to 10 for say a couple of bucks per game...win ALL the games. It's a church basement, so I don't think you'll suffer Paul Newman's penalty in "The Hustler". :rolleyes: (edit) Just put your winnings in the collection plate so God will forgive you. ;)
 
How to know when you have really won!

You will have won when the following occurs:
1. He cries in front of the congregation
2. He donates his cue to the church
3. He gives up the sport....
Anything less than all of the above will only encourage him.
 
The floggings must continue until morale improves. After all, with beatings, like many other things in life, it is more blessed to give than to receive.
 
NEVER! I never let anyone win no matter how old or anything else. It takes away from the victory they get when they finally do win. I play my 5 year old in chess and never let him win. Sure he gets upset but think of how happy he will be when he beats me by earning it. Yeah I want him to win, I really do, but I will not give it to him.
 
Treat him like republican not a democrat

Sweet Marissa said:
On Thursday nights, we have a group of young adults that meet at our church called Veritas. In our meeting room, we also have a game area where we socialise before worship. There we have, among other things, a pool table. Nothing fancy. It's an old eight foot with worn out red cloth and crappy balls.

There's one kid, Michael, in his early twenties, who wants to play me every week. When I do, I go easy on him, but only because it's church. It's kinda obvious (or it is to me). I also let him win sometimes.

I don't care about letting him or anyone win a few games because it's church. The only thing that gets me is his behaviour. He takes slop shots then claims he meant to make that shot (I chuckle and let it slide but a couple others call him out on it), protests profusely if I get ball in hand, and tries to shark me when I'm up (I ignore it). When he "wins", he's all around the room bragging about how I'm his biggest opponent and he beat me, happier than a kid at Christmas. When I win, I shake his hand or give him a hug and take my seat.

It obviously means a lot to him, but he's just so frikkin obnoxious about it and, to be honest, it's pretty annoying. But I don't want to be mean. I guess my question is, would I be a bad person if I didn't let him win these games?
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Marissa, Church, school, sports, etc. has many purposes one of which is to prepare us for life. Life is about winners and yes losers and this guy should use your ass kicking to realize he needs to improve or lose just as in our capitalistic economic system. My nephew was being put in high school games for the last 2 minutes to say he played; democratic view as every one winds up the same. I suggested he refuse to go in if it was just to say he played and practice more to earn the playing time. Two years later, he has won the
Phoenix 3 on 3 tournament 2 consecutive years.

Losing teaches winners how to win if they are winners. I got my butt kicked the 1st time I played pool and 6 months later I was the Collegiate straight pool national and bowling champ in the same year.

KICK HIS ASS AND FIND OUT IF HE WANTS TO TRY AND WIN BY PRACTICING
 
I would say to keep your cool Marissa. it's only a fun match. don't let it get into your nerves unless you're playing him with a huge bet. I played a lot of certain average people for fun and by beating me seems to be such an achievement for them. I, myself know for a fact and admit that I'm better than these people whom I played against, and they themselves know it. by knowing that alone, I don't care if I lose some of these matches intentionally or not. as the saying goes, it's better to be lucky than good.

besides, you don't want to let some of his confidence lost playing against you if you decide to obliterate him totally in all of your matchups. unless of course you don't want to play with him anymore or strike some fear in him that he decides to quit playing pool forever.

Here were some of my experiences just to tell you that it's not healthy to always win.

I had somewhat that kind of an experience with a close friend of mine. he invited me to play some pool. it was the first time that he did and never knew that I had a background in playing the game. so he was the one who was lecturing me about the rules of the game and I intently listened. as the match started and progresses, he began to notice that I was stringing some shots, seldom misses, banks alot with confidence and notices himself being stucked to his chair rather than having his turn on the table. it was fun for me but it wasn't for him. actually, he decided to call it quits under an hour of playing. he didn't win a single rack. I could tell by his face that he didn't enjoy it. after some time, he invited me to play pool again. as we were playing this second time around, he was jokingly telling me that he would bust my A** this time. So as I was stringing some shots again, he finally uttered something like "You are doing it again" (referring to my string of shots). boy, that was the last time that he invited me out to play with him.

Another experience was with my blind date. the good thing about this date was that she said that she knows how to shoot pool, the bad thing was she bragged about her playing level being somewhat competitive to my level (which she didn't know yet). I just assumed that she'll be a good match for me and I expected a lot of excitement and enjoy a game of pool since I was very convinced in her pool getaways. so upon the initial first rack, I stepped up on the gas and was making balls in a flurry. as I looked at her, she had this surprised petrified look on her face and when it was her turn on the table, I was like saying Oh No, Jeepers , OMG ! yep, she sucked! she felt so embarrassed. however, eventhough that she sucked, I was also giving her a benefit of a doubt that maybe she got scared too much or had a really really bad offnight. besides, I myself had some of these offnights where I really play shitty pool right after bragging that I play good pool too. I tell you that I myself feel embarrassed when I cannot prove something that I had said. now, back to my story, that match didn't last long. it took only about 30 mins and she doesn't want to play anymore. after that, she never bothered to call me back and I never saw her again.
 
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