Who is Jack Hines?
- Thread starter billb
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PoolBum said:
I dont even know what I am suppossed to type here.... That story is one of the strangest things I have ever heard...
I am flabbergasted....
He was really actually playing 9ball with a lizard walking around on his back????I mean, was he playing with the thing over on the corner.. or was he actually getting over shots at the table with a freaking reptile crwaling on his shoulder ?????
W
T
F
It was a young Iguana maybe 7-10" long. It was hilarious. As a TD, it was probably the only time I ever busted out laughing before I had to reprimand a player. Every time I think about that I cant help but laugh.
LOL still. I mean, it was funny.
I almost gave the game to the other player because I thought the Iguana pushed the 9-ball into the pocket but Jack's opponent got such a kick out of it he said to let him have the game.
We were picking on Jack because we thought he came up with the best gaff in the world. "If the ball don't fall,,, send in the Lizard".
This thread just reminded me of soooo many other amazing things I have seen over the years. Peru Paul used to get soo drunk he would bump into tables and they would move 2 or 3 feet. At one event I was about to kick him out but after talking with him he convinced me to let him play ( he was a pretty good guy). I remember watching the match, his opponent broke and ran 10 racks then made 7 balls on the 11th break and couldn't get out. Paul won that game then broke and ran the next 10 for the win. And yes, he was extremely drunk. Back in those days at bar box events in bars it was pretty common for many of the players to have a few toooo many.
I think that was back in 94 or 95. Ahhh, the good old days.
Mj
LOL still. I mean, it was funny.
I almost gave the game to the other player because I thought the Iguana pushed the 9-ball into the pocket but Jack's opponent got such a kick out of it he said to let him have the game.
We were picking on Jack because we thought he came up with the best gaff in the world. "If the ball don't fall,,, send in the Lizard".
This thread just reminded me of soooo many other amazing things I have seen over the years. Peru Paul used to get soo drunk he would bump into tables and they would move 2 or 3 feet. At one event I was about to kick him out but after talking with him he convinced me to let him play ( he was a pretty good guy). I remember watching the match, his opponent broke and ran 10 racks then made 7 balls on the 11th break and couldn't get out. Paul won that game then broke and ran the next 10 for the win. And yes, he was extremely drunk. Back in those days at bar box events in bars it was pretty common for many of the players to have a few toooo many.
I think that was back in 94 or 95. Ahhh, the good old days.
Mj
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JimS said:
There was nothing funny about the animals dying even though they were just Lizards. It was Jack that was funny. He was legitamately upset, pissed, mad and a whole bunch of other emotions and he was almost in tears ( Here we are with Jack, a low down dirty rotton scoundrol, pool hustlin drug addict that would rob you in a heartbeat upset about dead lizards - evn though everything I said about Jack her is tru he was still an awesome character and mostly fun to be around). In the meantime his GF was really upset screaming that the babies died, the kids died in the car, they are all dead - which of course alerted the whole pool room because everyone originally thought she was talking about kids not lizards. For a moment they got lost in there own world but Jack came out of it quicker and made a few wise cracks that made most laugh then continued on with his matches to win the event.
Like I said, it was sad but funny.
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MikeJanis said:
I get what you mean.....
I mean, it is such a wacked out story that you just have to laugh.. but at the same time it is pretty shitty that his pets died.
Here you have a pool playing crack smoking dump artist con man legend knocking off a tourney with reptiles crawling ON HIS BODY WHILE HE SHOOTS...then he is brought to tears at their death...THEN jacks the railbird for all of the cash...
It is just a twisted thing..
WTF sums it up best
Peru Paul
Paul was a friend of mine, and most of the players thru Indiana, for that matter. I saw win many matches nearly passed out on his feet. The funniest one, Paul is playing a set for $500, race to 9 I think. Anyway, he's on the hill and my buddy Mac is getting ready to go collect as Paul gets straight in on the 9. Paul passed out, and fell to the floor. The other guy is jumping up and down saying he has to forfeit since he can't finish the match and wants Mac to pay them. So Mac starts throwing water on Paul and smacking him. Telling him he has to shoot the 9 to win the $$$$$. Gets him to his feet and he shoots the ball in and passed out again. I laughed so hard I was crying.
Sorry, didn't mean to high jack the thread.
MikeJanis said:
Paul was a friend of mine, and most of the players thru Indiana, for that matter. I saw win many matches nearly passed out on his feet. The funniest one, Paul is playing a set for $500, race to 9 I think. Anyway, he's on the hill and my buddy Mac is getting ready to go collect as Paul gets straight in on the 9. Paul passed out, and fell to the floor. The other guy is jumping up and down saying he has to forfeit since he can't finish the match and wants Mac to pay them. So Mac starts throwing water on Paul and smacking him. Telling him he has to shoot the 9 to win the $$$$$. Gets him to his feet and he shoots the ball in and passed out again. I laughed so hard I was crying.
Sorry, didn't mean to high jack the thread.
MikeJanis said:
I get real upset about cruelty to animals, human or lizard type animals, so I believe, in retrospect, that I over-reacted to what I read. Sorry.
It is weird that a guy can be a totally self-serving drug addict and yet be brought to tears when a lizard dies. There still IS a human soul with feelings in the worst among us.
I have many funny stories to tell about Jack Hynes, but this is one of the funniest:
Jack Hynes was playing in Toledo's Glass City Open back in the mid eighties where he was playing real good and still in the winner's bracket. This was great news for me because me and two other locals had put Jack into the tournament and we thought we were going to make some money on our investment. The bookies at the event had Jack pegged to place in the top 10 and were taking bets from the spectators. Jack got five backers to lay down a $1,000 each that he would finish in the top three. The deal was they would split the winnings 60/40 with Jack getting 40.
Things were looking pretty good for Jack until a pretty little thing showed up to cheer him on in a match where he waxed a local unknown 11-0. She was about 19-years old, 5 foot 4 inches tall, long black hair, full pouty lips, and a beautiful face with a 100 watt smile. Jack never had a chance.
Consequently, Jack never showed up for his next two matches and was forfeited out of the tournament. The five backers, each of whom put up $1,000, were looking for Jack with murder in their eyes and vowed that Jack would never dump anyone again. In fact, because it was known that I helped stake Jack into the tournament, one of the backers thought I knew where he was hiding with the girl and brandished a small gun at me. WHOA!
Jack was never found and I didn't see him again until 1992. I sold my Toledo area APA franchise and bought the APA franchise in Louisville, Kentucky. On my first night out visiting area host locations, I stopped into a bar called the Hilltop and was amazed to see Jack Hynes, way in the back of the bar,
with a pair over bib overhalls on, chewing a wad of chaw, and hustling abouta crowd of about 30 locals for $2.00 a game 8-ball! The barmaid said she couldn't believe a guy so drunk, talking so stupid, could be as lucky as he was shooting pool. She said he won over 75 games of 8-ball and just barely won every time with a luck shot! Heh, heh...little did she know!
After no one would play this lucky sod buster anymore he bet about 20 people, to the tune of $5.00 apiece(with his girlfriend holding the money), that he could jump the cueball over the 8-ball and onto the next table and land it two hops into a beer case that was on the floor! Now THAT had everyone's attention! Jack's girlfriend couldn't take peoples money fast enough as Jack takes a house cue, raises the butt end vertical to his chin, takes about 5 strokes with the stick and then with grim determination... BLAM!, hits it up over the 8-ball onto the other table, the cue ball hops two long hops, flys off the table lands dead center into the beer case!
There was absolute dead silence as everyone witnessing that shot not only just witnessed the best shot they had ever seen in their life, but knew that this so-called country bumkin they'd lost all their $2.00's to had been hustling them all afternoon and they were pissed.
During the commotion, I saw Jack go into the men's room and I'll be damned if he ever came back out. There was a little window in the bathrom but it was too small for him to get out of and when the crowd tried to find the girlfriend who was holding the cash, she was gone, too!
To this day, I don't know what happened to Jack or the girl with the cash, but I know I had just witnessed something spectacular. I know they still talk about that day like he was ghost from another dimension.
Tom Gearhart
Jack Hynes was playing in Toledo's Glass City Open back in the mid eighties where he was playing real good and still in the winner's bracket. This was great news for me because me and two other locals had put Jack into the tournament and we thought we were going to make some money on our investment. The bookies at the event had Jack pegged to place in the top 10 and were taking bets from the spectators. Jack got five backers to lay down a $1,000 each that he would finish in the top three. The deal was they would split the winnings 60/40 with Jack getting 40.
Things were looking pretty good for Jack until a pretty little thing showed up to cheer him on in a match where he waxed a local unknown 11-0. She was about 19-years old, 5 foot 4 inches tall, long black hair, full pouty lips, and a beautiful face with a 100 watt smile. Jack never had a chance.
Consequently, Jack never showed up for his next two matches and was forfeited out of the tournament. The five backers, each of whom put up $1,000, were looking for Jack with murder in their eyes and vowed that Jack would never dump anyone again. In fact, because it was known that I helped stake Jack into the tournament, one of the backers thought I knew where he was hiding with the girl and brandished a small gun at me. WHOA!
Jack was never found and I didn't see him again until 1992. I sold my Toledo area APA franchise and bought the APA franchise in Louisville, Kentucky. On my first night out visiting area host locations, I stopped into a bar called the Hilltop and was amazed to see Jack Hynes, way in the back of the bar,
with a pair over bib overhalls on, chewing a wad of chaw, and hustling abouta crowd of about 30 locals for $2.00 a game 8-ball! The barmaid said she couldn't believe a guy so drunk, talking so stupid, could be as lucky as he was shooting pool. She said he won over 75 games of 8-ball and just barely won every time with a luck shot! Heh, heh...little did she know!
After no one would play this lucky sod buster anymore he bet about 20 people, to the tune of $5.00 apiece(with his girlfriend holding the money), that he could jump the cueball over the 8-ball and onto the next table and land it two hops into a beer case that was on the floor! Now THAT had everyone's attention! Jack's girlfriend couldn't take peoples money fast enough as Jack takes a house cue, raises the butt end vertical to his chin, takes about 5 strokes with the stick and then with grim determination... BLAM!, hits it up over the 8-ball onto the other table, the cue ball hops two long hops, flys off the table lands dead center into the beer case!
There was absolute dead silence as everyone witnessing that shot not only just witnessed the best shot they had ever seen in their life, but knew that this so-called country bumkin they'd lost all their $2.00's to had been hustling them all afternoon and they were pissed.
During the commotion, I saw Jack go into the men's room and I'll be damned if he ever came back out. There was a little window in the bathrom but it was too small for him to get out of and when the crowd tried to find the girlfriend who was holding the cash, she was gone, too!
To this day, I don't know what happened to Jack or the girl with the cash, but I know I had just witnessed something spectacular. I know they still talk about that day like he was ghost from another dimension.
Tom Gearhart
billb said:
A newscaster in Boston, but ..... you might be talking about another field of endeavor.
JoeyA, thank you so very much for your most kind words!, and I too would like to shake your hand and call you a friend!..... indeed....., your post was awesome its self!
Mike Janis: the (Iguana) and tomgearhart: (The Great Escape) post about Jack Hynes were equally enlightening as well!!!
I guess if a person is talked about enough, regardless of their short comings or acomplishments, they shall Truly Never Die!
David Harcrow
Mike Janis: the (Iguana) and tomgearhart: (The Great Escape) post about Jack Hynes were equally enlightening as well!!!
I guess if a person is talked about enough, regardless of their short comings or acomplishments, they shall Truly Never Die!
David Harcrow
S
Scottster
Guest
MikeJanis said:
I dont know if it was this tourney or not but Danny Harriman was telling me about playing Jack in a tournament and seeing something squirming around in Jacks shirt while he was getting down on a ball. It freaked Danny out! He asked him (quietly) what the hell was going on in his shirt? Jack looked around and told Danny it was his pet iguana. He then told Danny that he had 2 more of them on top of the light and that he was hoping they wouldn't jump down on the table during the match. Sure enough, Danny said there were 2 more on the light.
MikeJanis said:
I get upset about people who are such low-lifes that they injure animals or that laugh when an animal is hurt and I thought you were doing that. Then I saw that it appeared that was not the case... so I apologized.
Your rude response indicates that I was right in the first place and that you don't have respect for animals and also don't have respect for people.
This makes me really sorry I backed your bid to represent players with the BCA. You're the wrong kind of guy for the job.
JimS said:
Dude, c'mon I was joking.
I have had animals all my life. As a kid it would have been easier to kill my sister than to kick my dog. (Not that I would really kill my sister, just wanted to many times as a kid...lol.) I have never liked anyone that hurt animals on purpose either. I ran over a Bunny 1 day and took it to the vet cause I felt soooo bad. Thats the kinda guy I am.
Mj
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MikeJanis said:
Really? I'm the dude that aims for critters on the road, unless it's a moose or a cow or something that would thrash my pickup
bigskyjake said:Really? I'm the dude that aims for critters on the road, unless it's a moose or a cow or something that would thrash my pickup
The one thing this site needs is more smiley faces so it's easier to illustrate when a joke is being made. The words in your post just didn't convey to me that you were kidding.
Sorry I distrusted you and I'm glad you really are the kind of "good guy" I had you pegged as being. Hope there's no hard feelings.
JimS said:
None taken. Sorry if I,.... well you know.
No hard feelings at all, I'm glad we got it resolved. Fortunately many years on this board has provided me with some pretty thick skin. Not only does it keep things from getting in but sometimes he keeps real things from getting out to.
I'll share this with'ya. One time as a teenager my Uncle Chuck took me hunting. Put a shotgun in my hand and told me what to do. Fortunately I didn't kill nothin but unfortunately I watched a deer die. It was pretty brutal. I have never even thought about going hunting again nor have I encouraged it to any of my kids. The only good side is that my Uncle Chuck actually ate the deer but I still disagree with the whole hunting thing.
On a good note. I won the most curious nature student award when I was in the 5th grade. I found a baby animal while at camp with the school and nurtured it the entire time I was there. The teachers kept trying to take it from me saying they would take care of it or turn it loose and it was only nature if the animal died but I wanted nothing to do with that. It was my baby and I was gonna make sure it lived. It did and right before the camp went home I finally convinced the teachers to call the local zoo. A person cam from the zoo and picked it up and assured me they would make sure it had a good home. It turned out to be a baby Wolfe and it was the 1st one the zoo had ever seen born in Ohio that they could definitely trace. I still have the award to this day.
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