First off, this is not a APA problem you are experiencing. You are here ranting about APA because of some experience you had and attempting to lump the league and all players into it as bad. Which is wrong on your part, period.
Second, the game issue you describe is more a your lack of knowledge of the rules. Regardless of what he thought, if he thought it was a close shot he should have stopped you and asked for someone to watch the shot. If he failed to do that, then he loses the ability to call a bad hit unless it is blatant and witnessed by others that can confirm it. I would hope you are a good sportsman and would call it on yourself anyway if that was the case. Regardless of skill level everyone should be aware of the rules and if someone tried to act as though he knows better because of his skill compared to yours and you tell him the rule and can show him the rule if he wants to debate it, then that will shut him up quick. That is what you should have done in this case regardless of who he brings to the table to tell you otherwise. This is not even a gray area rule, it is black and white. You don't ask for a watcher, the call goes to the shooter.
Now I know.