Attending a wedding vs. going to a pool tournament.

[JoeyA]

I was wondering what the consensus was here on AZ concerning the proper way to handle a certain situation like when should you choose going to a wedding over going to a pool tournament?

Should you give up going to a pool tournament because a friend is getting married? OK, maybe depending on how close you are to that person but what if the person is more of an acquaintance. Should you just send a gift or is your attendance still mandatory.

What about relatives? You know the distant cousins and brother in laws nephews and nieces. Should you give up a good tournament to attend a wedding? Where do you draw the line? I'm sure everyone here would attend their daughter or son's marriage but I would hope the son or daughter would have checked with dad before selecting the DCC tournament dates.

What about showing up at the wedding or the reception for a few minutes just to show your face. After all, who's going to miss you at the wedding especially if you sign the guest register, send a gift and put in a quick smile at the bride and groom then head back to the tournament where you would be sorely missed.

Does your wanting to attend a nice fun tournament make you into a bad guy if deep down you prefer to go to the tournament instead of the acquaintance/friend's wedding?

And no its not about me. I'm just writing for someone else who is having trouble making up his mind.
JoeyA

 

[TATE]

I was wondering what the consensus was here on AZ concerning the proper way to handle a certain situation like when should you choose going to a wedding over going to a pool tournament?

Should you give up going to a pool tournament because a friend is getting married? OK, maybe depending on how close you are to that person but what if the person is more of an acquaintance. Should you just send a gift or is your attendance still mandatory.

What about relatives? You know the distant cousins and brother in laws nephews and nieces. Should you give up a good tournament to attend a wedding? Where do you draw the line? I'm sure everyone here would attend their daughter or son's marriage but I would hope the son or daughter would have checked with dad before selecting the DCC tournament dates.

What about showing up at the wedding or the reception for a few minutes just to show your face. After all, who's going to miss you at the wedding especially if you sign the guest register, send a gift and put in a quick smile at the bride and groom then head back to the tournament where you would be sorely missed.

Does your wanting to attend a nice fun tournament make you into a bad guy if deep down you prefer to go to the tournament instead of the acquaintance/friend's wedding?

And no its not about me. I'm just writing for someone else who is having trouble making up his mind.
JoeyA

We only have a few big tournaments out here I play in and I really look forward to it. I was signed up for one that had a bunch of pros in it and I was really stoked to play. I paid my entrannce and had made arrangements to carpool with a couple of friends, etc. Two weeks before the tournament I got a call from a good friend's daughter inviting me to his 50th birthday party. I told her I couldn't go because I was playing in a big tournament.

I got a call from my friend and he asked me to cancel the tournament plans to attend his party. I said no - I was already previously committed. I found out later he was steamed.

My feeling is, if I commit to some plans, I stay with them. I go with the program.

Otherwise, you can just use the golden rule. For example, would you lose respect for a friend or relative who blew off your wedding to watch a baseball game? Most of us would be disappointed if confronted with those facts.

Chris

 

[CaptiveBred]

No brainer for me Wedings are just an excuse for a woman to throw a huge party where it is demanded that she be the absolute center of attention. Its a dream come true for them even though they know it is manufactured

Short answer - go to the tournament cause its *real*

Longer answer - show your face and "get sick", disappear, just don't go and say "meh, what are ya gonna do about it?", etc... Nothing is worse than time burglers. When I lived in Phoenix, all my family lived there. So, EVERY single weekend there was some event that I just had to go to... Year round too. It was miserable to say the least. After a good couple years of this, I finally started to not care and just be the bad guy and say "sorry, I don't want to go". It was rocky at first, but after people understood i was not going to come, they got used to it

Don't let time burglers steal your personal time for their selfish attention parties.

And pool always comes first, right?

 

[!Smorgass Bored]

This One's TOO Easy

Seriously Joey, I consider you a friend, even though you refuse to invite me to your home. Skip the wedding, go to the wedding RECEPTION, say hello and then fill your pockets with food and proceed to the tournament as scheduled.....
Doug
( and take some Wet-Naps )





.

 

[Jimmy M.]

I made a decision not too long ago that I would not go to any more weddings unless I was really close with, at least, one of the two people getting married. So, for myself, that would be an easy choice. If I were really close to the people getting married then, naturally, I wouldn't skip their wedding. However, if I wasn't really close to either of the people getting married, I wouldn't be going anyway, so I'd go to the tournament.

I was wondering what the consensus was here on AZ concerning the proper way to handle a certain situation like when should you choose going to a wedding over going to a pool tournament?

Should you give up going to a pool tournament because a friend is getting married? OK, maybe depending on how close you are to that person but what if the person is more of an acquaintance. Should you just send a gift or is your attendance still mandatory.

What about relatives? You know the distant cousins and brother in laws nephews and nieces. Should you give up a good tournament to attend a wedding? Where do you draw the line? I'm sure everyone here would attend their daughter or son's marriage but I would hope the son or daughter would have checked with dad before selecting the DCC tournament dates.

What about showing up at the wedding or the reception for a few minutes just to show your face. After all, who's going to miss you at the wedding especially if you sign the guest register, send a gift and put in a quick smile at the bride and groom then head back to the tournament where you would be sorely missed.

Does your wanting to attend a nice fun tournament make you into a bad guy if deep down you prefer to go to the tournament instead of the acquaintance/friend's wedding?

And no its not about me. I'm just writing for someone else who is having trouble making up his mind.
JoeyA

 

[Sweet Marissa]

......................

 

[!Smorgass Bored]

And, Put A Shawl Over Your Sholders

Joey, when I first met you, you surprised me with your agility, mental acuity, razor sharp wit and lightning fast decision making. BUT, after your recent birthday, you seem to be slipping just a little.
I believe that you are now the target audience for this little gem:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zqfFrCUrEbY

Doug
( have a glass of warm milk and ENJOY )

 

[ShootingArts]

it's a question of class

Joey,

It is a question of class. Always keep one cube of black chalk in your case just for those occasions when a tournament occurs and someone who is close to you is having a wedding, such as your bride to be. Dashing back and forth between your wedding and the tournament, a moment's lapse and you can get chalk on your suit. Miss Manners says that blue chalk on your suit at your wedding is tacky but nobody will notice a little black dust on a black suit or tux. You have to think ahead. Of course wearing a suit or tux in that perfect shade of blue works too.

Easy enough to judge if the happy couple really look forward to your presence at a wedding or if they are just present trolling when they send you an invitation. If they really would value your presence try to catch at least a few minutes of the wedding and reception so that you can make your presence known and then duck out. You can always explain later that you had prior commitments but really wanted to be at the wedding. If they are just present shopping, have your wife score a card and drop a modest portion of your winnings in an envelope with it and figure your obligation has been met.

Hu

 

[JoeyA]

We only have a few big tournaments out here I play in and I really look forward to it. I was signed up for one that had a bunch of pros in it and I was really stoked to play. I paid my entrannce and had made arrangements to carpool with a couple of friends, etc. Two weeks before the tournament I got a call from a good friend's daughter inviting me to his 50th birthday party. I told her I couldn't go because I was playing in a big tournament.

I got a call from my friend and he asked me to cancel the tournament plans to attend his party. I said no - I was already previously committed. I found out later he was steamed.

My feeling is, if I commit to some plans, I stay with them. I go with the program.

Otherwise, you can just use the golden rule. For example, would you lose respect for a freind or relative who blew off your wedding to watch a baseball game? Most of us would be disappointed if confronted with those facts.

Chris

Watching a baseball game is considerably different from playing in a baseball league tournament.

But I've just started reading and will pass the consensus on to my buddy who is facing the problem.
JoeyA

 

[JoeyA]

Joey, when I first met you, you surprised me with your agility, mental acuity, razor sharp wit and lightning fast decision making. BUT, after your recent birthday, you seem to be slipping just a little.
I believe that you are now the target audience for this little gem:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zqfFrCUrEbY

Doug
( have a glass of warm milk and ENJOY )

Well, in your last paragraph, you finally made a decent contribution to the forum with that little gem of a video even though its not pool related.

But as to the first part of your post, go look at the last frame of the video for my answer to you.
JoeyA

 

[JoeyA]

Mr. Manners

Joey,

It is a question of class. Always keep one cube of black chalk in your case just for those occasions when a tournament occurs and someone who is close to you is having a wedding, such as your bride to be. Dashing back and forth between your wedding and the tournament, a moment's lapse and you can get chalk on your suit. Miss Manners says that blue chalk on your suit at your wedding is tacky but nobody will notice a little black dust on a black suit or tux. You have to think ahead. Of course wearing a suit or tux in that perfect shade of blue works too.

Easy enough to judge if the happy couple really look forward to your presence at a wedding or if they are just present trolling when they send you an invitation. If they really would value your presence try to catch at least a few minutes of the wedding and reception so that you can make your presence known and then duck out. You can always explain later that you had prior commitments but really wanted to be at the wedding. If they are just present shopping, have your wife score a card and drop a modest portion of your winnings in an envelope with it and figure your obligation has been met.

Hu

Your answer is the one I will share with the young man who shares this dilemma.
JoeyA

 

[bigskyjake]

ULTIMATE NO-BRAINER

Go to the pool tournament, he'll thank other forum members and me later

A: Churches are stuffy and hot and you feel like an ass wearing a tux

B: everyone's balling there heads off and that's always a buzz-kill

C: if he's close to the newlyweds he'll be asked to pose for a rediculous amount of pictures

D: He'll have to deal with 8.3 billion people he doesn't know coming up and giving him hugs "just because"

 

[TATE]

Watching a baseball game is considerably different from playing in a baseball league tournament.

But I've just started reading and will pass the consensus on to my buddy who is facing the problem.
JoeyA

It wasn't clear in your first post that he was playing in a league tournament. Whether or not to attend largely depends on the relationship with the bride and groom, who else is expecting him to attend, etc.

Most people I know would cancel all but the most important plans to attend the wedding of a beloved friend or relative. I would. However, I also usually have a lot of fun at weddings.

Chris

 

[JoeyA]

It wasn't clear in your first post that he was playing in a league tournament. Whether or not to attend largely depends on the relationship with the bride and groom, who else is expecting him to attend, etc.

Most people I know would cancel all but the most important plans to attend the wedding of a beloved friend or relative. I would. However, I also usually have a lot of fun at weddings.

Chris

It is a regional tournament he was looking forward to playing in.
JoeyA

 

[tom haney]

I missed the annual Tournament of Champions at the neighborhood
pub( I was the solid favorite) to attend my son's graduation
from high school. I hope he understands the sacrifice I made for him.

 

[sde]

Well, in your last paragraph, you finally made a decent contribution to the forum with that little gem of a video even though its not pool related.

But as to the first part of your post, go look at the last frame of the video for my answer to you.
JoeyA

LOL ... at least he knows you watched the whole video.

Steve

 

[Snapshot9]

Reduce it

to its simpliest form. Could you show up at this person's door with suitcase in hand, and they would take you in for a month until you got back on your feet? If so, go to the wedding, otherwise go to the tournament? <grins>

 

[cuetable]

I was wondering what the consensus was here on AZ concerning the proper way to handle a certain situation like when should you choose going to a wedding over going to a pool tournament?

LOL Joey, wedding is the best place to pick up chicks plus there are free booz and cake, some dancing too.... I will choose to go to a wedding over a pool tournament, unless it's Dirby City Classic... Fortunately most people don't get married around that time of year...

(Now, let's start a "Should Wei Be Banned From AZ" thread )

 

[JoeyA]

www.cuetable.com the best pool product on the market and it's free.

LOL Joey, wedding is the best place to pick up chicks plus there are free booz and cake, some dancing too.... I will choose to go to a wedding over a pool tournament, unless it's Dirby City Classic... Fortunately most people don't get married around that time of year...

(Now, let's start a "Should Wei Be Banned From AZ" thread )

Wei,
You would just be trying to get some free advertisement if we started a thread like that.

You already have the BEST POOL PRODUCT ON THE MARKET and it's FREE.

You have made one of the most valuable contribution to the Internet pool community. Your product is unique and fun to use and did I say it was FREE to use. You will also help anyone who has trouble using it, RIGHT?

BTW, I thought you were "attached"? More girls? Come on. How much time do you have on your hands?

JoeyA

www.cuetable.com

 

[Jack Madden]

I was wondering what the consensus was here on AZ concerning the proper way to handle a certain situation like when should you choose going to a wedding over going to a pool tournament?

Should you give up going to a pool tournament because a friend is getting married? OK, maybe depending on how close you are to that person but what if the person is more of an acquaintance. Should you just send a gift or is your attendance still mandatory.

What about relatives? You know the distant cousins and brother in laws nephews and nieces. Should you give up a good tournament to attend a wedding? Where do you draw the line? I'm sure everyone here would attend their daughter or son's marriage but I would hope the son or daughter would have checked with dad before selecting the DCC tournament dates.

What about showing up at the wedding or the reception for a few minutes just to show your face. After all, who's going to miss you at the wedding especially if you sign the guest register, send a gift and put in a quick smile at the bride and groom then head back to the tournament where you would be sorely missed.

Does your wanting to attend a nice fun tournament make you into a bad guy if deep down you prefer to go to the tournament instead of the acquaintance/friend's wedding?

And no its not about me. I'm just writing for someone else who is having trouble making up his mind.
JoeyA

What ever the wife decides REPEAT whatever the wife decides