Billiard quotes
- Thread starter Side Pocket Kid
- Start date
From Mosconi?
"Fancy pool sticks don't mean nothing if you can't use it right. If you don't believe me, let's play and I'll use a broom stick. The most important part of a pool cue is the chalk."
"Fancy pool sticks don't mean nothing if you can't use it right. If you don't believe me, let's play and I'll use a broom stick. The most important part of a pool cue is the chalk."
Texas Fives
I was on the road with a Very GOOD player We were in a local spot,BUT NO $ 2-4 a game. The road player wanted to leave, I told him put the money [25 cents] up!! He did, came back over to me,now lose, he did, I walked over to payoff said HERE-gave him a fifity, he said we were playin for five not fifty!! I SAID HONEY THAT IS A FIVE KEEP IT,He said NOOOO I SAID Yep A Texas Five,Thats all the change I have, THEY SENT OUT to play us it was a fun-house after that !!!TEXAS-FIVES!!!
I was on the road with a Very GOOD player We were in a local spot,BUT NO $ 2-4 a game. The road player wanted to leave, I told him put the money [25 cents] up!! He did, came back over to me,now lose, he did, I walked over to payoff said HERE-gave him a fifity, he said we were playin for five not fifty!! I SAID HONEY THAT IS A FIVE KEEP IT,He said NOOOO I SAID Yep A Texas Five,Thats all the change I have, THEY SENT OUT to play us it was a fun-house after that !!!TEXAS-FIVES!!!
"The more I practice, the luckier I get."
B.J.the bandit said:I was on the road with a Very GOOD player We were in a local spot,BUT NO $ 2-4 a game. The road player wanted to leave, I told him put the money [25 cents] up!! He did, came back over to me,now lose, he did, I walked over to payoff said HERE-gave him a fifity, he said we were playin for five not fifty!! I SAID HONEY THAT IS A FIVE KEEP IT,He said NOOOO I SAID Yep A Texas Five,Thats all the change I have, THEY SENT OUT to play us it was a fun-house after that !!!TEXAS-FIVES!!!
.....was anyone able to interpret this???
didn't want to read all nine pages here so if these were used then what the hell
Jesus every ball hit all six rails and nothing went in.
Excuse me Sir, but i need to see your duke license.
All thunder no rain.
Chalk is Free.
Bet if you put some hair by that hole you would of have hit it.
Jesus every ball hit all six rails and nothing went in.
Excuse me Sir, but i need to see your duke license.
All thunder no rain.
Chalk is Free.
Bet if you put some hair by that hole you would of have hit it.
These aren't great, but here goes..
A guy who can easily spot me the 7 asks me "What kinda weight are ya givin me?" I said "The last two" while grabbing my nuts.
I saw a guy get ball in hand on either the 6 or 7 and he didn't get out and said "Shit, I couldn't run out the fuckin door!"
A guy who can easily spot me the 7 asks me "What kinda weight are ya givin me?" I said "The last two" while grabbing my nuts.
I saw a guy get ball in hand on either the 6 or 7 and he didn't get out and said "Shit, I couldn't run out the fuckin door!"
The only other one i know
After losing, You can't win them all, no one would want to play you.
After losing, You can't win them all, no one would want to play you.
I couldn't hit sand if i fell off a camel...
I had this one cousin that betted someone a hundred dollars saying by laying his cue stick on the table and he could make the cueball roll under it, the guy laughed and said shure. he grab the cueball and rolled it under the table, started a fight.
I had this one cousin that betted someone a hundred dollars saying by laying his cue stick on the table and he could make the cueball roll under it, the guy laughed and said shure. he grab the cueball and rolled it under the table, started a fight.
Mick012656
Registered
When one of our local players was asked... "Rick, You want to play some" Rick replied "Hell no, I want the nuts"
Another local player after losing and asked how he come out... " Well Jim left in a hurry cuz he had to go to the court house and register as a sex offender he raped me so bad."
Another local player after losing and asked how he come out... " Well Jim left in a hurry cuz he had to go to the court house and register as a sex offender he raped me so bad."
I can't believe that the most common, most used, and most abused quote of all time in billiards hasn't been mentioned here:
"There ya go."
It is used by 99% of bangers right after a miss. And the table is usually full of many balls, clustered together in an impossible-to-runout situation.
Jeff Livingston
"There ya go."
It is used by 99% of bangers right after a miss. And the table is usually full of many balls, clustered together in an impossible-to-runout situation.
Jeff Livingston
blah blah
Shoebat
my old teacher (from Georgia) was a cocky smart @ss. A few of his endless ones:
when beating me (or a good friend), he'd sing "it's so easy/ like taking candy/ from a babyyyy." ...his singing totally sucked, too, but he didn't mind being told.
or he'd stand at the backroom door looking at all of the B players playing out front. When asked what he was looking at: "Just admiring the pond."
Or, "My mama always told me, when in doubt, hit 'em HARD."
He esp likes if you point out that his mama didn't play pool.
Finally, he'd walk in and say,
"Eight to Eighty,
Blind, Crippled, Crazy-
I'll beat anybody in here.
Specially the blind ones- bring 'em on."
when beating me (or a good friend), he'd sing "it's so easy/ like taking candy/ from a babyyyy." ...his singing totally sucked, too, but he didn't mind being told.
or he'd stand at the backroom door looking at all of the B players playing out front. When asked what he was looking at: "Just admiring the pond."
Or, "My mama always told me, when in doubt, hit 'em HARD."
He esp likes if you point out that his mama didn't play pool.
Finally, he'd walk in and say,
"Eight to Eighty,
Blind, Crippled, Crazy-
I'll beat anybody in here.
Specially the blind ones- bring 'em on."
Back in the '70s my hair was a lot longer than it is now. I was playing an older guy some nine ball. He played a real tough safe on me, impossible to get out of. As he walked away from the table he said "Smoke that hippie"
Lunchmoney
Lunchmoney
I was away from pool for several years. I returned in an APA league an had a very good, outspoken "Super 7" (Kenny Holman) as my first team captain.
This must be a pool saying, because he said it a lot...
"What the f@#* were you thinking? That was the dumbest thing I ever saw!"
This must be a pool saying, because he said it a lot...
"What the f@#* were you thinking? That was the dumbest thing I ever saw!"
NYC cue dude
Banned
After making a really difficult shot, say out loud.....
"Your'e not going to find THAT on page one!!!
rg
"Your'e not going to find THAT on page one!!!
rg
I got the nutz,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,Im playin even-------------the Great Morticai
