As usual, Hu is dead on.
Maybe the rest (some, many, most) of you may not have not had the same experience I have, but the poolrooms I frequented, or adopted, were very much my living rooms. This forum shares many of the same attributes. I have often observed to myself that there is a fundamental difference between poolrooms and forums, and the decorum or lack, owing to one being "virtual" and the other real. Much of the more egregious conduct found in this forum would not have occurred in the first place or would have been quickly extinguished in a real world pool room. In my old real rooms, bad behavior and bad attitudes were very often followed by real consequences -- jawing only went on so far or long. In this incomplete virtual world, there is so much we are forced to abide due to the absence of immediate physical access.
We all sin. If we were "better" folks, we would have hung out in church and would now be posting in a Bible Study forum. But we are what we are, with shared experiences and lessons. One lesson Dean missed, or rejected, was the necessity of acceptance/acknowledgment of fault/responsibility and true expression of repentance. In most disputes, people are not seeking compensation alone -- they want, or need, to hear: "I was wrong . . . I am sorry." Words more are more valuable than gold in many situations. The same holds true where someone has actively defended a third party who is ultimately proven to have been in the wrong: "Dean was wrong . . . I was wrong . . . I am sorry that . . .". I have not followed each and every step in the Jackpot Travail, but I would guess that, if such words had ever been offered, or timely offered, we would not be engaged in the instant exercise.
My grandfather was often heard to say, "you can try to sell me a bowl of shit, just don't try to tell me it is ice cream." I have often pondered his exact, deepest, meaning without a satisfactory conclusion, but I somehow sense that he provides a perfectly appropriate assessment of Dean's situation.
Less.
