Girlfriend wants me to stop playing pool

Fall of 1997... Met a guy and fell in love.

Spring of 1998... Got married. Moved in together. Then the controlling behaviour appeared. He made me quit pool. He even threw away my cue. I wasn't allowed to drive my own car - he had his best friend drive me when I needed. Made me leave school and get a waitressing job at a bar he went to. In order to have a ride home, I had to relinquish all my tips, and that's after putting his and his friends' drinks on my tab.

Winter of 1999... The divorce was finalised. During which he fought for my camera, and I never got back my photographs, artwork, movies, clothes, furniture, and more which he took when we separated.

Don't give up something you love and are passionate about for any person, especially when they know about it coming into that relationship.
 
Last edited:
Relationships worth keeping involve give & take

I'd say it's a give and take situation.. Like one or two others said, 5 or 6 nights is a ton of pool if you are not making a living at it.

If you do REALLY care about this girl, what's it really worth to you. IMHO, if she want it to work, she will meet you in the middle and you can still hit the table 2 nights a week or so, sounds like she just wants someone to be there for her and the child for the most part.

If she's asking you to give it up completely, that's another story, I'd say cya! If she just wants a compromise and you feel that she's worth holding on to, go with your gut.
:o
The situation is dependent on what you want out of life.. I've been a pool nut on and off most of my 40 years but family comes first HANDS DOWN!! No questions! I play in league one night per week, one tourney most weeks and a big tourney several times per year. My wife is understanding and she has put up with me for 17 years.. YMMV

Good luck and always remember, any good relationship has it's give and take.. I find it to be most rewarding when I do more than my share of giving!

Peace, Joey
 
I look at it as a positive. Be glad that she told you NOW....and not later when you're in so deep that you can't get out.

I started playing in leagues after I got married. One year my wife actually told me to play two nights a weeks instead of one (although now I think that she regrets that).

But...I used to hunt a lot before I got married and I used to go to Vegas every year with guys from high school. I was slowly but surely squeezed out of doing those two things. I guess that I would rather play pool anyway....but if she is already pressuring you to quit doing things, you can be sure that it won't stop once you get married. Good luck!
 
Robroy said:
Boy you guys are tough action!!!
So let me get this straight you want your cake and eat it too? Is that what I'm hearing?
Pool or anything...there must always be give and take. Your not doing this for a living your just an addict like the rest of us (not I anymore).

I promise you....at the end of this road....if you have pool to choose or a family that you love....no coin toss here...I take the family!

However that being said, in every relationship there is compromise.
If you or her are not ready to talk and agree it is FOR SURE not time to be moving in together. Frankly...its not fair to the little one.

In my humble opinion of course ;)
Click to expand...

Hold on just a sec.
You mean to tell me, that when you first discovered pool and were a NEW addict, that you would have actually listened to someone telling you to stop?

And he said it's been like 3 months. Kind of short term to be taking the family view into account don't ya think?
He's not at the end of the road yet, he's just at the beginning.

I predict they will break up, and then something like this will happen.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4PCW4VDFj7M
 
"If you love something, let it go.........if she lets you put a pool table in the dining room, it was meant to be".:cool:
 
Robroy said:
Boy you guys are tough action!!!
So let me get this straight you want your cake and eat it too? Is that what I'm hearing?
Pool or anything...there must always be give and take. Your not doing this for a living your just an addict like the rest of us (not I anymore).

I promise you....at the end of this road....if you have pool to choose or a family that you love....no coin toss here...I take the family!

However that being said, in every relationship there is compromise.
If you or her are not ready to talk and agree it is FOR SURE not time to be moving in together. Frankly...its not fair to the little one.

In my humble opinion of course ;)
Click to expand...

With all due respect, I disagree. Take a man away from what he loves and eventually the family will break apart. Sure, the family should be number one. BUT, it's wired into men...they NEED something besides only work and family. Luckily, I married a woman who understands this...
(edit) But 5-6 nights a week of pool? I'd get burned out quickly...I suspect you will too, eventually.
 
Last edited:
Bye Bye!!!

So Long! Adios! There must be a million ways to say slide out the back jack!!
Also you should hook her up with this thread after you get rid of her!!
Dan
 
Find a girl who loves you for who you are rather than who she thinks she can turn you in to. Unless its Jessica Alba, in which case, pool is a complete waste of your time and you really need to be home with your girl.

Kevin
 
just buy a pool table and teach the kid how to play. then you can play pool 7 days a week and watch the kid at the same time. SHE PLAYS POOL RIGHT??? WTF!!!
 
There are a couple of things to consider. First, if she is asking you to quit pool, the relationship probably won't last anyway. You can't change another person. She has to accept you for who you are and what you do. The same thing goes for you. You have to acccept the fact that she doesn't like the idea of you going out 5 nights a week to play. There is probably some room for compromise on both parts. As someone suggested, maybe 2 nights of league and a tournament or two each month would work for her.
Just be aware that if she feels that way about your pool now, it is unlikely that she will change, even if she agrees to compromise. And if you really want to play pool 5 nights a week and end up cutting it down to 2 or 3, you are going to feel some resentment toward her.

Bottom line, nobody on here can tell you what to do. You need to do a realistic self evaluation of what is important to you.

Good luck.

Steve
 
Sweet Marissa said:
Fall of 1997... Met a guy and fell in love.

Spring of 1998... Got married. Moved in together. Then the controlling behaviour appeared. He made me quit pool. He even threw away my cue. I wasn't allowed to drive my own car - he had his best friend drive me when I needed. Made me leave school and get a waitressing job at a bar he went to. In order to have a ride home, I had to relinquish all my tips, and that's after putting his and his friends' drinks on my tab.

Winter of 1999... The divorce was finalised. During which he fought for my camera, and I never got back my photographs, artwork, movies, clothes, furniture, and more which he took when we separated.

Don't give up something you love and are passionate about for any person, especially when they know about it coming into that relationship.
Click to expand...

Dang... he must be built! I can't get supper after work.

Sounds like your future with that dude was a missing poster.
 
First - I need to see a picture of her before I can give an informative reply. Include a picture of yourself so we can see if you out kicked your punt coverage.
 
Be careful, her interest for pool may be a hidden

resentment. How would you meet her in a pool environment while with her Father and her not understand the passion for the game? Pool is a great past time that can be shared as a family.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top