Have you read, 'the inner game of tennis', and 'sports psyching'? Both of those books not only got me back on track, but changed my attitude. 'sports psyching' went deep into the different reasons people complete and what type of performer a person is. I found that I tended to put looking good over winning. If I made an awesome shot or great shape in a game I had accomplished my internal goal. Knowing this made me change my conscious goal and my subconscious goals to better align. I learned to be okay with an ugly win, or even playing to not lose when necessary. I cut down on the hero shots and started winning... And being happier when I lost.
Learn to enjoy it for the process, not the result.
And I'm not a damn hippy, even if this post makes me sound like one