one of my many road hustles
- Thread starter real bartram
- Start date
Iowa Mike said:Proper form would help....... Please allow me to correct your story as I am an aspiring novelist of the highest order... I stayed at a Holiday Inn Express this morning.
My road partner and I along with, "The Saw" went to a no name town and in this town there is a bar named "Red Robin" yes like the restaurant but don't let that fool you it was a rough and tumble like place. The best player is a dude named Pablo. My friend played Pablo for 50 $1 bills a game. We have to give el Pablo the 6 from either of us or else he will bring in the Marachi's and sing us to death. "The saw" wins 500 clamaroos' at 50 a game.
Not bad, but the guy with all the money is the moth******* I'm after. After the horrible disappointing loss, el loser Pablo "dogged me like a stray dog" to play. I decided to acquiesce and played him at 50 a game and I lose 500 green backs right back to el chump Pablo perfectly bringing us even. The cashola dude with the green that I want to pocket like a hangin' 9 ball arrived to witness this exchange. I played this freak with the cash (who consequently needs the last six like a bag of poo). I ran the numbers in my head using euclidean geometry with base factoring and probability matrix's and decided to play "big bucks" for 300 a game giving him the black ball also known as the 8. I stalled like a 76' Pinto because it was out of line. I deftly ground $4000 from his wallet by the end of the exchange leaving him wearing a wife beater and depends for adults.
Now, this "tool box" Pablo wanted to play me again seeing how I'm flush from murdering "trailer park huggies." I decide to play act like I'm Eddie Murphy in Beverly Hills Cop (part 1 not the rest of the trash) and I act scared and slightly put off by his request and on bended knee say that my partner will play while I squirt Visiene in my eyes to make it look like I'm crying. However, my Meryl Streep impression does not work and he keeps pestering me like a fat kid in $.99 cent donut shop with $.97 cents. I tell him that I can not win against his nearly invincible "Efr-earl Strick-eyes" play for 50 stripper candies a game, but I think that his kojones will shrivel up and plop in the toilet if he tries to play me for $300 a rack. As it turns out I was a prophet as the near future shows me with 3000 donuts in my fat ass pocket, and now he really can't play for $300 a game cause he lost his rent, car payment, and his doctor bills money. The only way to save face is he has to go home and commit "seppuku" with a dull spoon. Some "toy truck" from the crowd of onlookers wants to play now. But, this "pocket monkey" wants the 6, 7, and 8 ball. I refer to him as Senor Wrinkles cause he was like dust he must have been from Egypt or something like 7000 years old. I played el Mummy for 800 quarters a game (a.k.a 200 smoochers). He lost 2000 green backs (runnin' out of synonyms here) all because I lost 500 green pieces of paper called dollars to Pablo.
The End
(Ghost Written by Iowa Mike) a.k.a "The Man" a.k.a "Super Ninja"
:thumbup: :smile::grin:
i've read this about 5 times and cant quit laughing! comedic genius.
u r rite Craig!!!!! some peoplle just haveta try an tell pepole how to act??????you ainnt the boss of me!!!!!!!!!! most of the time its cause they dont know anything to say!!!1 first time i seen T-Rex was the houston open at legands..... all kindda strokers and champs. T.C. looked real young with a big ole bald head. ac wasnt working and the tables ya could surfed on em they were so wet with salt water!!!!!! toneys talking on a little bitty cell-phone held to his big ass ear with his shoulder,,,, shooting some force-follow 3-rail shots and not missing all the time talking to somebody while smoking them shots,and he had his head bent down funny looking to hold the phone!!! he wasnt even looking at the balls. found out he wasnt very old from califoniia thats y he could play them wet tables....i think he could play any tables no mater what. i coundnt belive the action he was getting. i stayed and watched him alot... dont know who won jj or gabe or denis the used car hustler... great times was had by alll;;;; even if we cannt spell!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!or type?? ZZ Brock
Craig said:
Craig,
You share the opinion of most of us here on AZ Billiards. A little ribbing (IF YOU HAVE SOME HISTORY WITH ANOTHER PERSON) about spelling or typing is cool.
Needling a person (especially someone who you don't know personally)because of spelling or typing errors in their post, simply to try and make yourself look like an intelligent person is a foolish act.
We all say and do foolish things from time to time.
We're just lucky that Schmitty takes that kind of sheeyat in stride or he would be gone too. John, thanks for sticking around and contributing.
HOPEFULLY, those who take the time to critique poster's writing style will see that this is not appreciated and that it hurts the forum as a whole.
I think even the grammar critics will agree that having posters on AZ like Bartrum, Harriman, Mills, Crosby, Incardona, Appleton, Schmidt, Grady and all the rest of the professional players is a BIG PLUS FOR AZ BILLIARDS.
If you really want to help someone, do it private in a PM but for the most part what I've seen about correcting someone has been an attempt to denigrate another individual's writing skills. If they don't respond, you know they don't want your help.:bash:
So just for the benefit of the forum as a whole, let's all just drop the "teasing" about "grammer", spelling etc and enjoy everyone's posts.
JoeyA
JoeyA said:
See you at DCC
