Playing Pool After A Divorce

PoolRookie

PoolRookie

Minnesota
Silver Member
I know some people require more time than others to recoup after a divorce.. But I know this may sound pathetic to some but Its been 16 months and I can't play nowhere near the level I played while married. I was a APA 7 now I play like a 5 or less..I can't get the thought of losing the one I loved even more than pool out of my head while playing..My question is has anyone experienced this and how long is this expected to last?
 
PoolRookie said:
I know some people require more time than others to recoup after a divorce.. But I know this may sound pathetic to some but Its been 16 months and I can't play nowhere near the level I played while married. I was a APA 7 now I play like a 5 or less..I can't get the thought of losing the one I loved even more than pool out of my head while playing..My question is has anyone experienced this and how long is this expected to last?
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When I got divorced pool was what I used to escape from the hurt and heartache I felt.

Basically it will last as long as YOU let it last. The power is inside you and no where else.
JMO.

BVal
 
I didn't really start playing pool until after I got divorced. Had a bunch of time on my hands and a coworker invited me out to play. Been hooked ever since.
 
PoolRookie said:
I know some people require more time than others to recoup after a divorce.. But I know this may sound pathetic to some but Its been 16 months and I can't play nowhere near the level I played while married. I was a APA 7 now I play like a 5 or less..I can't get the thought of losing the one I loved even more than pool out of my head while playing..My question is has anyone experienced this and how long is this expected to last?
Click to expand...

That's a long time to be still feeling this bad, I hope that you
have someone you can go talk to about this and help you
move on to happier times.
hugs
mrs.g
after my first divorce I think I was doing the happy dance
for months, or years or still am,,,lol
 
I played regularly for @ 2 years when in High School. Off to college, then career, then marriage, then kids. Fast forward to May of 07 and divorce. Back to pool. All the escape and misguided therapy I could ask for!

In the beginning of playing again... Suffice it say I didn't own enuf hats to put all my ass that was handed to me.

But my game got better and better, much due to AZB! Why your game has suffered is surely not apples to apples to my situation. As Mrs. g states, it would appear after 16 months you haven't let go of the pain and your "pool chi" is being blocked. Not my case.

Dawg recommends Dr. Phil. I recommend an exorcism. Then a hormone labotomy to ensure you don't make the same mistake twice.

(we're just messin'. But if she's still all up in ya, & ur game is in reverse, then you might need to change tac. Good luck, k?)
 
Get some counseling. What you are experiencing is abnormal and you need some help to get past it. Do it soon.
 
Hookers and alcohol!

Only advise you need....

Hookers and alcohol...repeat as necessary... :thumbup:

I've been divorced twice and just broke up with a woman who I thought was going to be the third Mrs. Waltz! I'm dead outta stroke right now, but most definately planning on a wild weekend of loose women and much alcohol!

Stay away from drugs though....they're bad for ya! LOL :grin-square:
 
PoolRookie said:
I know some people require more time than others to recoup after a divorce.. But I know this may sound pathetic to some but Its been 16 months and I can't play nowhere near the level I played while married. I was a APA 7 now I play like a 5 or less..I can't get the thought of losing the one I loved even more than pool out of my head while playing..My question is has anyone experienced this and how long is this expected to last?
Click to expand...

This may sound kind of sappy but to me pool has always been my escape. After some of the worst days of my life I went to the pool hall and played. I know what you mean but for the time being enjoy pool and don't press to hard. You are lucky to have it. Many have nothing they care about and end up drinking or worse. I remember when my father died I was 21. I went from the funeral to the pool room. Family members knew why and didn't question it. At the pool room they just left me alone and I took a back table and practiced straight pool for about 4 hours. I am sure I will play pool the rest of my life and will always feel blessed I have somewhere to go and something I care about.
 
Divorce

My brother just got burnt in a divorce and was pretty messed up. He clearly finds bedding 2 or 3 hotties a week to be very therapeutic.

Disclaimer: He still sucks at pool!
 
Funny for me it was just the opposite ... My pool game declined when I got married ... Once I got divorced my game improved ... Marriage left little time to play and honestly the first few years I did not want to play I was happy at home ... After about 5 years my head was in no condition to play to many issues and head games... Finally enough was enough I took my son and we Ran... Ran ...ran away to a far away place ... Went to court got a divorce and custody raised my son and my game has been on the rise ever since. No more argueing , worring about what my other half was doing , No more police knocking on my door , No argueing or fussing or money trouble ... Life is good .... Life is great ... Who needs that problem I am now responsible for myself and answer to no one ...

As Mr Val stated it is all in your head and how strong of a person you are. It will end when you decide to put it behind you ... AND MOVE ON ... Pool should have made you develop a strong mind to face difficult circumstances use it ...
 
channel the pain or use pool to escape

PoolRookie said:
I know some people require more time than others to recoup after a divorce.. But I know this may sound pathetic to some but Its been 16 months and I can't play nowhere near the level I played while married. I was a APA 7 now I play like a 5 or less..I can't get the thought of losing the one I loved even more than pool out of my head while playing..My question is has anyone experienced this and how long is this expected to last?
Click to expand...

You can channel the pain to focus even more intently on pool or you can use pool to escape for a few hours. With some effort you should be able to do either one. I wish I could give you a step by step guideline to help you but I think every person is different when it comes to things like this.

Try focusing on every shot like it was the game ball in a big match or tournament, focus on making the shot and the exact path of the cue ball and exactly where it will stop within an inch or so. Putting all of your focus and concentration into the effort at hand should keep your mind from wandering back to other things. When you catch your thoughts drifting, get up off of the shot, replot this shot and the entire run out, and try again.

I can't say it is easy, I went through much the same thing. However time and effort will get you where you really want to be.

Hu
 
I been divorced twice...and I never do anything three times. Met my first wife IN the pool room so I know the heartache. The second round was so fast it never sank in I was actually married, LOL.

Bottom line is the pool room is a mental sanctuary, tell him to leave his pain in the car and when he steps in the room he may have a better outlook. Good luck to him...
 
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