The BAT System

unsupportive spouses

Started playing two years ago. After two months of just playing at the pool hall twice a week, my husband bought me a pool table for our anniversary. Best present EVER! 8ft table. Gorgeous. I play every day. (He could care less about pool.)
 
Leigh said:
Started playing two years ago. After two months of just playing at the pool hall twice a week, my husband bought me a pool table for our anniversary. Best present EVER! 8ft table. Gorgeous. I play every day. (He could care less about pool.)
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Hi Leigh, glad you are enjoying your table 8ft table. Maybe one day we can play or have coffee or something. ;)
 
Dear Boxcar Abby,

I recently met this girl online, we will just call her "Leigh" for now. She has her own pool table at home and loves to play. I love to play too! I've been playing for quite a few more years than her, but I don't think it is an issue between us. She used the term "Gorgeous" and said she wanted to play everyday. I think she was talking about me! The problem is she has a husband, but he couldn't care less (her words). I'm confused. Should I pursue this relationship and potentially break up a new marriage?

Please advise when you are removed from the banned list. :o

Sincerely,

Troubled lover.
 
Got a buddy who had an 8ft diamond table in a small upstairs apartment. His woman and kids dealt with it in the living room. Who needs a couch anyway, right?

He ended up having to move into a small house that wouldn't fit the 8ft table. This was right after my wife passed, and I had just bought another house and was looking for a smaller table because my old 9ft would be too tight in the poolroom at the new house. I bought his 8ft diamond.

Now my buddy has a 7ft diamond in the living room at his new place. That's what players do. And a good woman deals with it.
 
Ya' know, there are a lot of "pool players" who remind me of that wannabee golfer who went down to the Pro Shop and bought a $5400.00 set of the latest sticks, a $4000.00 Italian leather bag, and the most expensive pair of Foot Joys money could buy....and will never, ever break 90.

Listen to me! Hang out on Craigslist in the "Free" category. Be patient. You "Dream Table" will come...fairly soon. Go get it and set it up yourself. Don't worry if it isn't level....you're not good enough for that to matter. Anyway, start playing. When you can break and run 3 racks of 9-ball straight, you'll be a Pool Player.

XOXOXO,

Abby
 
Boxcar said:
I was afraid that question might come up.

Fellas, sooner or later you are going to have to decide. Either you wear the pants in the family or she does. You made your bed, now ya' gotta sleep in it.

Go buy the nasty old table for 200 bucks. Set it up. And practice. When she realizes that pool is genuinely important to you, she will either support you, or leave. If she supports you, you made an outstanding choice. If she leaves, you made an outstanding choice. Either way, you win.

Look, guys, I can help. Just think of me as Dear Abby.
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No brainier. Do not ask for permission…. Beg for forgiveness. I know guy that got a table for his wife. Best trade he ever made
 
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Boxcar said:
Ya' know, there are a lot of "pool players" who remind me of that wannabee golfer who went down to the Pro Shop and bought a $5400.00 set of the latest sticks, a $4000.00 Italian leather bag, and the most expensive pair of Foot Joys money could buy....and will never, ever break 90.

Listen to me! Hang out on Craigslist in the "Free" category. Be patient. You "Dream Table" will come...fairly soon. Go get it and set it up yourself. Don't worry if it isn't level....you're not good enough for that to matter. Anyway, start playing. When you can break and run 3 racks of 9-ball straight, you'll be a Pool Player.

XOXOXO,

Abby
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People really need to stop worrying about what other people spend their own money on.
 
Boxcar said:
The BAT System

OK, you've just gone out and spent $900.00 for a new cue, and you can't make a ball. Your bride is miffed.

Sell the cue and Buy A Table. (BAT)

Buy a cheap table on Craigslist.
Buy an ugly table from a neighbor.
Buy a table with stained cloth.
Buy a table with old cushions
Buy a bar box if your house is small.
Buy a table with wonky slates.

Then INSTALL the table. Your bride is already miffed about the stick, so what.

Then borrow an old one piece cue from a friend.

Then practice 4 to 5 hours a day until you don't miss any shots.

OH, stop making excuses. If your house is real small, buy the bar box and stick it in a corner...and learn how to shoot on the two available sides. If you can't learn how to shoot pool, sell the table for a small profit and try something else.

The BAT System!
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Again on AZ? No offense, but my most devoted students practice many hours daily before we meet--because their shot making stinks on ice.

There ARE GREAT aim systems. GREAT!
 
Boxcar said:
Dear Deruki,

Your experiences are a living testimony to the old adage that "Decisions have consequences."

You are not God. When the Bible talks about "my brother's keeper," it is not suggesting that we should our brother's zoo keeper. In point, it is not incumbent upon you to make, or even suggest, life strategies for the lads with whom you play pool.

Whippem' like a rented mule. Take all their money, right down to their child support and/or tattoo money. If they beg for weight, give it to 'em, and keep whippin' the foo-foo feathers out of them.

You are in an enviable position. Through action and deed, your example may one day help them see the error of their ways...and at the same time, you will be winning enough money to buy that Diamond you've been dreaming of.

It can't fail!

You'll thank me!

Warmest regards,

Abby
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I find these comments oddly offensive, speaking on behalf of zookeepers.

When I beat the living tar out of someone then tell them it's cause I teach pool, I always give them a pool tip after. That's like--the closest we pool shooters get to loving our (whupped) neighbor.
 
Dear Abby
Clearly you need to take some sensitivity training. People are taking offense to your cruel and deceitful words.






P.S. Keep up the good work 👍
 
chalkdust said:
deceitful words.
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Cruel, perhaps. Deceitful, never. My words are as true as a Mother's Love.

Those who would drink from the Lofty Fountain must be thirsty enough to endure the ascent. Neither money nor magic can mount the pinnacle.

Victory is found in the heart, not in the prince's coffers or the sorcerer's spell.

Go within! The answer can only be found in the caverns of the soul.

With respect,
Boxcar
 
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