Funny pic/gif thread...
- Thread starter dfweyer
- Start date
I am SOOOO sorry for what follows
One day Dracula is walking down the street when suddenly 10 tons of smoked salmon sandwiches, bridge rolls, pitted olives, chicken wings, chipolatas, tomato salad, pizza slices and potato chips.
ALL smothered in garlic falls on him from a great height and knocks him to the ground.
"Oh no!"
he gasps with his dying breath...
"It's Buffet the Vampire Slayer!"
One day Dracula is walking down the street when suddenly 10 tons of smoked salmon sandwiches, bridge rolls, pitted olives, chicken wings, chipolatas, tomato salad, pizza slices and potato chips.
ALL smothered in garlic falls on him from a great height and knocks him to the ground.
"Oh no!"
he gasps with his dying breath...
"It's Buffet the Vampire Slayer!"
This one is about as bad: A woman walks into a bar with a pet pot belly pig under her arm. The barkeep hollers "hey, we don't serve dogs in here". The woman says "this is not a dog, it is a pig". Barkeep says "I am talking to the pig".
What do People fear most
Two magazines, Country Living (95.99% white readership) and Ebony /Jet
(99.99% black readership) did surveys on "WHAT DO PEOPLE FEAR MOST?"
The results were interesting, to say the least...
Country Living magazine's top three answers were:
1. Nuclear war/terrorist attack in U.S
2. Child/spouse dying
3. Terminal illness
Ebony/Jet magazine's top three answers were:
1. Ghosts
2. Dogs
3. Registered mail
No Kidding. And these are the people who put Obama over the top.
Two magazines, Country Living (95.99% white readership) and Ebony /Jet
(99.99% black readership) did surveys on "WHAT DO PEOPLE FEAR MOST?"
The results were interesting, to say the least...
Country Living magazine's top three answers were:
1. Nuclear war/terrorist attack in U.S
2. Child/spouse dying
3. Terminal illness
Ebony/Jet magazine's top three answers were:
1. Ghosts
2. Dogs
3. Registered mail
No Kidding. And these are the people who put Obama over the top.
MMA Look A Likes
Took a girl home after clubbing last night. After a few drinks, we went upstairs and while we were taking our clothes off a voice came from the bed and said "I hope that's not that fat one from last week". The girl said "What the **** was that?" I said "It's that bastard memory foam mattress".
http://www.snopes.com/racial/humor/fearmost.asp
Cliffs: None of the publications named therein — Country Living, Ebony, or Jet — ran such a survey and obtained the listed results.
Cliffs: None of the publications named therein — Country Living, Ebony, or Jet — ran such a survey and obtained the listed results.
So by extension, the people gullible enough to believe this is true are the ones who put the Republicans over the top in the Senate?
..
ding ding ding !!!!!!!!!
Once upon a time there lived a King.
>>>>>>The King had a beautiful daughter, The PRINCESS.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>But there was a problem. Everything the princess touched would melt.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>No matter what;
>>>>>>Metal,
>>>>>>Wood,
>>>>>>Stone,
>>>>>>Anything she touched would melt.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>Because of this, men were afraid of her. Nobody would dare marry her.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>The King despaired. What could he do to help his daughter?
>>>>>>
>>>>>> He consulted his wizards and magicians. One wizard told the King,
'If your daughter touches one thing that does not melt in her
hands,she will be cured.'
>>>>>>
>>>>>>The King was overjoyed and came up with a plan.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>The next day, he held a competition. Any man that could bring his
daughter an object that would not melt would marry her and inherit
the King's wealth.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>THREE YOUNG PRINCES TOOK UP THE CHALLENGE.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>The first brought a sword of the finest steel.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>But alas, when the Princess touched it, it melted.
>>>>>>The prince went away sadly .
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>The second prince brought diamonds.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>He thought diamonds are the hardest substance in the world and would
not melt.
>>>>>>But alas, once the Princess touched them, they melted.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>He too was sent away disappointed.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>The third prince approached. He told the Princess,
>>>>>>'Put your hand in my pocket and feel what is in there.'
>>>>>>
>>>>>>The Princess did as she was told, though she turned red.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>> She felt something hard. She held it in her hand.
>>>>>>And it did not melt!!!
>>>>>>
>>>>>>The King was overjoyed. Everybody in the kingdom was overjoyed.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>And the third Prince married the Princess and they both lived
happily ever after.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Question: What was in the Prince's pants?
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>M&M's of course.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>They melt in your mouth, not in your hand.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>What were you thinking??
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>I WORRY ABOUT YOU SOMETIMES!!!
>>>>>>
>>>>
>>>>>>The King had a beautiful daughter, The PRINCESS.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>But there was a problem. Everything the princess touched would melt.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>No matter what;
>>>>>>Metal,
>>>>>>Wood,
>>>>>>Stone,
>>>>>>Anything she touched would melt.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>Because of this, men were afraid of her. Nobody would dare marry her.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>The King despaired. What could he do to help his daughter?
>>>>>>
>>>>>> He consulted his wizards and magicians. One wizard told the King,
'If your daughter touches one thing that does not melt in her
hands,she will be cured.'
>>>>>>
>>>>>>The King was overjoyed and came up with a plan.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>The next day, he held a competition. Any man that could bring his
daughter an object that would not melt would marry her and inherit
the King's wealth.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>THREE YOUNG PRINCES TOOK UP THE CHALLENGE.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>The first brought a sword of the finest steel.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>But alas, when the Princess touched it, it melted.
>>>>>>The prince went away sadly .
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>The second prince brought diamonds.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>He thought diamonds are the hardest substance in the world and would
not melt.
>>>>>>But alas, once the Princess touched them, they melted.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>He too was sent away disappointed.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>The third prince approached. He told the Princess,
>>>>>>'Put your hand in my pocket and feel what is in there.'
>>>>>>
>>>>>>The Princess did as she was told, though she turned red.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>> She felt something hard. She held it in her hand.
>>>>>>And it did not melt!!!
>>>>>>
>>>>>>The King was overjoyed. Everybody in the kingdom was overjoyed.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>And the third Prince married the Princess and they both lived
happily ever after.
>>>>>>
>>>>>> Question: What was in the Prince's pants?
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>M&M's of course.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>They melt in your mouth, not in your hand.
>>>>>>
>>>>>>What were you thinking??
>>>>>>
>>>>>>
>>>>>>I WORRY ABOUT YOU SOMETIMES!!!
>>>>>>
>>>>
..
This is a pretty standard pic of a bride and her bridesmaids, right? WTF???
