Dealing with opponents with poor social skills

justnum

justnum

Billiards Improvement Research Projects Associate
Silver Member
I play leagues mostly.

Most times I play, there is some friendly and quick exchanges between shots.

Then there are the occasionally players that are overly talkative, or loud self talkers.

Comments are typically complaints, obscene outbursts and even physical displays of anger.

I like playing league, but when I play those types of players it takes all the fun out of it.

I've gotten better at minding my own business, but am starting to consider if I should speak up. At pro events it seems like they would rather wait till after the fact, then say something before anyone acts up.

Other days I go full method and just start acting a part.
 
I personally play with a killer instinct. I’m not verbal but will respond to friendliness with friendliness. Anything else I completely zone out. I consider it a mental exercise to see how fast I can reset and refocus after a mistake without dragging any of it into my next inning at the table. The same goes for any antics my opponent has. I almost feed off their negativity when they are chirping because I know they’re taking that into their next inning at the table. I can feel momentum shift my way when they act like that.


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MattPoland said:
I personally play with a killer instinct. I’m not verbal but will respond to friendliness with friendliness. Anything else I completely zone out. I consider it a mental exercise to see how fast I can reset and refocus after a mistake without dragging any of it into my next inning at the table. The same goes for any antics my opponent has. I almost feed off their negativity when they are chirping because I know they’re taking that into their next inning at the table. I can feel momentum shift my way when they act like that.


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Click to expand...

A very reasonable attitude...:bow-down:
 
pt109 said:
A very reasonable attitude...:bow-down:
Click to expand...


I draw inspiration from Johnny Archer. The way this match takes a rollercoaster of a turn would have buckled most people. Even when he was making mistakes and not playing his best, he never slunk back in his chair. He always reset and waited like a cat of prey just looking for the opportunity to pounce and murder.

https://youtu.be/i6phXtXpaJo


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Good responses. It's hard to play against an attitude type. I like the idea of feeding off of their negativity. I often find myself smiling and nodding in agreement with every smartass comment that comes from their mouth.
 
man it is different now

I can't imagine the players of years ago ever saying that. Cornbread tells
Danny Jones " I got the nuts, for a thousand a game but this guy has such
poor social skills there is no way I'm going to play". "I don't blame you one
bit Corn" says Danny "anyway Opera is coming on, lets go".But maybe you
are right. I think that one of the reasons that a lot of the older good players
don't like leagues is because when they played back then it was not for fun
but to put food on the table, and the only thing that mattered was get the money
any way you can. Pool was a job,you did other things for fun. You didn't give
a s--- about their social skills, just get their money, all of it. Hard to see it the
other way.
jack
 
jackpot said:
...

Cornbread tells
Danny Jones " I got the nuts, for a thousand a game but this guy has such
poor social skills there is no way I'm going to play". "I don't blame you one
bit Corn" says Danny "anyway Opera is coming on, lets go"....

...
jack
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:rotflmao1:

That made me laugh.
 
BC21 said:
Good responses. It's hard to play against an attitude type. I like the idea of feeding off of their negativity. I often find myself smiling and nodding in agreement with every smartass comment that comes from their mouth.
Click to expand...

I agree and I also like to feed their ego.

Case in point is a guy I faced last night. Thus guy always comes up to me and starts bragging he beat so and so the other night and how bad he beat them. I always say ...good shooting. He plays me real tough and probably wins about half the time.. He outright annihilated me a few weeks ago in both 8 and 9 ball...not making any excuses but my head was not in it due to we only had 3 players there and I was upset about it. Well sure enough when he Sa me last night he come up and said he was wanting to play me and reminded me how bad he beat me the other night.

I replied I had nothing to do with the matching up and will play if and when the captain chooses. Well the captain throws me blind and sure enough this guy jumps up and tells his captain he wants me and commenced to telling him how bad he beat me a few weeks ago.

A lil bit later a team mate says his money is on me. I say ...what ? He says my opponent wanted to bet him that he beats me. I tell my team mate loud enough for my opponent to hear...well I hope you can afford to lose whatever you bet. My opponent just started smiling and goes over and talks with my team mate.

Well I wind up winning. Come to find out my team mate backed out because my opponent tried to hi roll him for 4 times the original bet.

What my opponent conviently keeps forgetting is that although he wins quite a few times during regular session ...he has never beaten me in playoffs or higher. I continue feeding his ego by saying I got lucky in those matches.
 
I try to channel my inner Shane Van Boeing and put on my ear buds.

To me pool is an anti social sport. I like to shake hands, lag for break and play the best I can play at that given moment.

Afterwards shake hands and maybe if they want to chit chat to be "social" but prefer to use that time to learn about mistakes to work on...
 
During play I give my opponents every courtesy I expect them to give me. I quietly & methodically play my game, and when not my turn I sit quietly, still as a statue far removed from the table. Now afterwards my team & buddies get to hear me crying & whining about every possible thing imaginable, but my opponent is safe :grin:
 
Occasionally I match up with players in the league:

1) a retiree that seems to be out of touch with his family many decades

2) young career pro in new town, with money and time being misdirected

3) divorced player that shares frustration during matches and while at the table

4) superstar player that only has fun when playing perfect pool

Most days when I say social, a simple hello and a pleasant day of shooting will do.

It usually ends up with me playing someone doing an exaggerated Earl Strickland impersonation. I am going to continue in the league, but I just had to talk about how the pool hall seems to be the safe place or the place people go to recover from deeply personal problems.

If I encountered a player who looks like they are about to overdose or commit suicide, I haven't figured out what to do ... But I think I am coming across those players more often.
 
My business is how I conduct myself. As long as I'm not disrespectful, and a good sport, what they do is their business, not mine. I could care less how they act, unless they are trying to distract me when it's my turn at the table (then they have stuck their nose in my business:smile:)
I've seen cue balls thru windows, broken cues, and a lot of other things. Didn't bother me for a second (I wan't the one that had to fetch the cue ball out of the parking lot):grin-square:

World is full of idiots, I ignore their stupidity when playing.
 
onepocketron said:
My business is how I conduct myself. As long as I'm not disrespectful, and a good sport, what they do is their business, not mine. I could care less how they act, unless they are trying to distract me when it's my turn at the table (then they have stuck their nose in my business:smile:)
I've seen cue balls thru windows, broken cues, and a lot of other things. Didn't bother me for a second (I wan't the one that had to fetch the cue ball out of the parking lot):grin-square:

World is full of idiots, I ignore their stupidity when playing.
Click to expand...


I'm playing for two years and I can't wait to see someone breaking his cue. So funny.
 
LeonD123 said:
I'm playing for two years and I can't wait to see someone breaking his cue. So funny.
Click to expand...

I don't see what's funny about being out of control and breaking a cue, especially if my head has a chance of being involved, or some poor waitress potentially gets a wooden shard through the eye.
 
PhilosopherKing said:
I don't see what's funny about being out of control and breaking a cue, especially if my head has a chance of being involved, or some poor waitress potentially gets a wooden shard through the eye.
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It would definitely not be funny if someone got hurt. But there is a bit of schadenfreude that can be funny when the misfortune is 100% self-inflicted due to bad manners.


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justnum said:
I play leagues mostly.

Most times I play, there is some friendly and quick exchanges between shots.

Then there are the occasionally players that are overly talkative, or loud self talkers.

Comments are typically complaints, obscene outbursts and even physical displays of anger.

I like playing league, but when I play those types of players it takes all the fun out of it.

I've gotten better at minding my own business, but am starting to consider if I should speak up. At pro events it seems like they would rather wait till after the fact, then say something before anyone acts up.

Other days I go full method and just start acting a part.
Click to expand...

Alcohol is frequently a factor. Competitive environment + alcohol.
 
MattPoland said:
I personally play with a killer instinct. I’m not verbal but will respond to friendliness with friendliness. Anything else I completely zone out. I consider it a mental exercise to see how fast I can reset and refocus after a mistake without dragging any of it into my next inning at the table. The same goes for any antics my opponent has. I almost feed off their negativity when they are chirping because I know they’re taking that into their next inning at the table. I can feel momentum shift my way when they act like that.


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Click to expand...

I like this. Great way to be.

KMRUNOUT
 
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