My girlfriend has an interest in pool. I have tried to encourage this interest. I have bought her a very nice lucasi, upgraded it with a predator shaft, got her a jump/break, anice leather case, all the fixings. She has become an average player. The truth is she is NOT interested in pool!
She is interested in spending more time with me, NOT in learning the game.
I really enjoy teaching, and I do not like teaching her. I feel it is taking away from my pool time which I consider to be valuable. Why?
Because her motive is not on really learning. The proof is because there are many times we have been in the pool room together for 8 hours or more. She could play as little or as much as she wants. Sometimes she may get a rack, and try to play for maybe 30 minutes, before she gets bored. If we play together, she will get tired of playing pretty quick, because I can beat her easily. We have tried handicapping it also.
Often when we go out to play, I will find someone who I would like to play, and she will get mad because she says "I thought WE were going to play!". I get irritated that I may miss out on an opportunity to play someone who is a challenge, when I know that if my girlfriend and I were to play, she will quit 4 or 5 racks into it.
I think it would be great if she had the real desire to play and shared my passion for the game, but it irritates me that she is just "going through the motions" to spend more time with me at the expense of my pool time.
In a perfect world we would want to spend every waking moment together and puppies would never die. But in the world I live in, it is healthy to have time away from each other and pusue our individual interests. There is not one single person on this earth that I want to spend 24/7 with.
I would suggest that you take him to a pool room ( maybe a different one that you normally go to, so you are not distracted by your friends) and let him use your cue or a house cue. See if there is a genuine interest. Let him know that you appreciate the fact that he wants to be more a part of your life. Tell him also that it took you a lot of time and effort to get your pool game to where it is and it will be required of him too. Let him know you take it seriously, and value your time for the game.
The biggest thing that he needs to know is that when both of you are in the pool room, that he will not be the primary focus. You have a routine, you have people that you play. If he can handle that, it may work. It sounds like the two of you have many other interests in common. It is okay for you to have individual interests too. Just tell him exactly how you feel and go through the specific situations. If he still wants to try, then test it out a bit. I would hold off on buying a new cue. Let him know it is not a requirement and that he would not even have developed the knowledge to even know what his cue preferences are yet. Also, if he has a new cue, he will feel more pressure to continue to play even if he decides that pool isn't for him.
This ends the first installment of "Dear Jason"
He took me to the Fernbank Museum of Natural History for the first time a couple weeks ago. It was awesome. He plays chess and likes to read about history and science. He watches the Discovery and History channel. He has two bachelor's degrees, one semester away from a third, and will be finishing his Master's in History this fall. He opens every door for me, even when I'm getting out of the car. He orders for me in restaurants. He tells me I'm beautiful and that he loves me every day. He goes with me to my church. He puts up with my wanting to watch crappy 80s movies. My puppy loves him. The puppy I rescued (that his parents adopted) loves him. He's sardonic, intelligent, thoughtful, handsome, attentive, and amazing in every way.
