Finding the Desire to Play the Game

Fast Lenny

Faster Than You...
Silver Member
For the past few years I have not had the desire to play the game. Depression, personal problems, raising children, and working on business. Time is not always the issue as I have a table at home I could certainly devote a solid hour or so to it daily if not more with this covid situation but it just collects dust. Sold my playing cue because I was not playing. Once in awhile I will play at my friend Pete's house and Steve Glenn will stop by and play alittle too. Somewhere along the line my passion for the game just died off. I haven't spent much time on this forum either which I used to enjoy too. It seems most of you are all still here. I used to really love the game and want to find that desire to really play again. Anyone else have this happen and what changed it for you?
 

philly

AzB Silver Member
Silver Member
Took over 40 years off.
Played from age 14, taking public transportation all over Philadelphia to play in the rooms,
until I was about 20.
All I did was play pool and hang in poolrooms.
Went to college and sold my stick.
A Hoppe.
Everybody had one.

Sort of the same reasons, school, marriage, family, work.
The important stuff.
About 7 years ago my son came home with a cue.
The rest is history.
Bit all over again.

Lots of guys take time off for one reason or another.
Something will bring the passion back.
 

Maxx

AzB Platinum Member
Gold Member
Silver Member
I’ve been hot and cold this year playing at home. This summer I tried straight pool for a while. Switching games (or cues) helps me stay motivated. Probably been averaging an hour a day since it got colder. Without competition it can be hard to keep the focus.
 

Lawnboy77

AzB Silver Member
Silver Member
Same here, I went years without playing, had lost interest and suddenly out of nowhere it came back. My advice is not to force it, if you don’t enjoy it, just step away from it and hopefully you will find another hobby, or interest to fill the void. If no interest at all in anything then by all means seek professional help. Nothing to be ashamed of, we all go through those times in our life.
 

HNTFSH

Birds, Bass & Bottoms
Silver Member
For the past few years I have not had the desire to play the game. Depression, personal problems, raising children, and working on business. Time is not always the issue as I have a table at home I could certainly devote a solid hour or so to it daily if not more with this covid situation but it just collects dust. Sold my playing cue because I was not playing. Once in awhile I will play at my friend Pete's house and Steve Glenn will stop by and play alittle too. Somewhere along the line my passion for the game just died off. I haven't spent much time on this forum either which I used to enjoy too. It seems most of you are all still here. I used to really love the game and want to find that desire to really play again. Anyone else have this happen and what changed it for you?
Took a 20 year break once the little kids needed the space my Medalist took up. Between hunting, fishing, dog trials, work, kids sports, etc. I just lost interest in getting out to parlors. Some of that behind me now, there's a GC1 where the Medalist once sat. Loving it more than ever. Once COVID settles a bit more I'll find some games outside the house assuming these guys can stay afloat. Prior to COVID I was playing a local place with bar tables and two 9 footers (my choice) and tipped like a fiend just to support the staff a bit.

I traded my player for 5 dozen Goose decoys (They aren't cheap!). Dumb in retrospect! :eek:

You'll get there.
 

SBC

AzB Silver Member
Silver Member
For the past few years I have not had the desire to play the game. Depression, personal problems, raising children, and working on business. Time is not always the issue as I have a table at home I could certainly devote a solid hour or so to it daily if not more with this covid situation but it just collects dust. Sold my playing cue because I was not playing. Once in awhile I will play at my friend Pete's house and Steve Glenn will stop by and play alittle too. Somewhere along the line my passion for the game just died off. I haven't spent much time on this forum either which I used to enjoy too. It seems most of you are all still here. I used to really love the game and want to find that desire to really play again. Anyone else have this happen and what changed it for you?
BET HIGHER!

A lot going on now and nothing in the pool world is the same. No big tournaments...less action.

Set some personal goals like a new high run or learning a new game. I understand things get in the way.

Might be time to develop a new hobby or an old one you used to enjoy. Getting outdoors, if you can is always good for the soul.
 

jsp

AzB Silver Member
Silver Member
For the past few years I have not had the desire to play the game. Depression, personal problems, raising children, and working on business. Time is not always the issue as I have a table at home I could certainly devote a solid hour or so to it daily if not more with this covid situation but it just collects dust. Sold my playing cue because I was not playing. Once in awhile I will play at my friend Pete's house and Steve Glenn will stop by and play alittle too. Somewhere along the line my passion for the game just died off. I haven't spent much time on this forum either which I used to enjoy too. It seems most of you are all still here. I used to really love the game and want to find that desire to really play again. Anyone else have this happen and what changed it for you?
You have a table at home? If I didn’t my own table, then my desire to play pool would have fizzled up 11 years ago when my second daughter was born. Have to say my table was the best purchase I’ve made in my life. It has helped me stay sane over the years while raising 4 kids.
 

Geosnookery

Well-known member
I play billiards and hike or cycle just about everyday. I dont have any issues but these activities are like meditation...I chill out, mumble to myself, get rid of any bits of rising stress.

On the practical side I have found it more motivating to make up my own games, unique rules, than playing conventional ones. More fun. I will make up a fantasy league: a schedule between 32 countries with divisions, play a round robin ...then playoffs, etc. Sounds a bit ‘dumb’ but I start to get right into it and often can’t wait to hit the table.

I never practice for the sake of it. I’d lose interest. I might try a few things but not in any disciplined way. I’ll also spend time banging balls around the table...no racking and use any ball as the cueball. When I start banging balls around and digging them out of the pockets, a half hour can go by as I’m brain dead but highly focused at the same time.
 

Dead Money

AzB Silver Member
Silver Member
For the past few years I have not had the desire to play the game. Depression, personal problems, raising children, and working on business. Time is not always the issue as I have a table at home I could certainly devote a solid hour or so to it daily if not more with this covid situation but it just collects dust. Sold my playing cue because I was not playing. Once in awhile I will play at my friend Pete's house and Steve Glenn will stop by and play alittle too. Somewhere along the line my passion for the game just died off. I haven't spent much time on this forum either which I used to enjoy too. It seems most of you are all still here. I used to really love the game and want to find that desire to really play again. Anyone else have this happen and what changed it for you?
A big upheaval in life and a big change in life responsibilities. I have not hit a ball in a while but I still mess around on here some because I like it.
 

pwd72s

recreational banger
Silver Member
Lenny, that's why my Palmer Model M from the 2nd catalog is so pristine... After marriage, a child to raise, a small biz to run, it just got placed in a closet...for decades! I'd almost forgotten about pool until one day on Jury duty and being told to get away from the courthouse during lunch to avoid influence attempts, I took a walk downtown...and wandered into a place with a sign saying "Billiards".

I was retired then...so Cindy & I drug our old cues out of the closet...couldn't make a ball after such a long absence. With the attention that Palmer got, I quickly learned it needed to go back in the closet and I needed another cue to begin learning how to play again. But..the fun returned.

It's no crime to take a break. Might even be healthy to do so.

Personal problems...they can be huge at times. Please keep in mind that they also can fade into the past as days and weeks go by. If needed, maybe consider some help on those. Please don't fall into a hole, okay? Things can..and do..get better. You never know what and/or who might be just around the corner.
 

JusticeNJ

Four Points/Steel Joints
Silver Member
I've been there too. Took years off for family and work. It was less because I didn't have the desire, but more that I hated the way I played because I couldn't play as often and sustain my usual level of play. It was genuinely unenjoyable. I recently got a table at home and was glued to it for the first 4 months. Now, I don't play as much, but enough to stay in stroke and enjoy it at a level I'm comfortable with.

I also sort of fell out of love with the pool scene. I have some of the best friends ever from playing pool. Really great guys. But I feel like pool rooms lost a little bit of the magic (or I just got old) and instead of the usual characters, it's dudes in sweatpants yelling at each other.
 

Tin Man

AzB Gold Member
Gold Member
Silver Member
You could always invest in yourself and take a trip to my dojo and train pool for three days.

I'm not making light of your situation. When you are overextended in life it can feel like you don't have energy to put into the game. I raised a family and worked a corporate job while competing as well so I get this. Even with some time you can just feel empty in your tank.

But I've learned a lot of that is because it feels hopeless. Just an hour a day. What are you going to do with that? Here's the heck of it. As long as you answer that question "There is nothing I can do with the level of time and energy I have" then you won't feel like doing anything with it. And while part of you might say "But it's TRUE, there's just nothing I can do", the price to pay for believing that is being unmotivated and losing the joy for a lifelong passion, and then letting that loss make the rest of life's battles feel slightly more meaningless and fruitless (see, I've been there).

Suppose you invested yourself and trained with me for three days, had a great vacation (like a marriage retreat to save your relationship with pool), and you learned to play this game in a level you couldn't before. You take a break and come home with a new way of seeing the table, new skills, and new things to work on that will allow you to play beautiful pool. You might just find that your passion has always been there and just took a spark from you. There might be nothing wrong with your racecar, you might just be stuck in the mud and once there is some open road ahead you might enjoy hitting the gas and feeling the wind in your hair.

I'm not saying it's easy. That trip would take time and money. And there would certainly still be days when you're feeling tuckered out after work and just don't have anything left in the tank. But the goal wouldn't be to play pool full time anyway. It would be to sustain a relationship with the game in your life. It's about balance.

No, you can't prioritize pool over family or work. But you also can't neglect yourself entirely. Because when you don't take care of yourself and live the life you're supposed to you don't exactly thrive as a father or employee. My best friend used to do this. For years he'd give up on pool and just say 'screw it, I can't do what I want with the game with the wife and kids so I'll just be miserable and focus on providing'. The results were always the same, he'd get horribly depressed and after 2-4 months of grinding with nothing to charge his batteries he'd be unpleasant and there would always be a family crisis. Finally he has learned to be more assertive about what he needs for himself with his wife and with himself. He is now doing better at business, as a dad, and he's having fun playing pool too.

So whether you bootcamp with me, go to a pro event, join a league, or whatever, I'd say you need to invest into your game and realize it's not selfish or lavish. It's your job to look out for the family but you are part of your family and you can't do much good if you're in trouble yourself. There's a reason they say to secure your own oxygen mask before helping others.
 

Black-Balled

AzB Silver Member
Silver Member
...I have found it more motivating to make up my own games, unique rules, than playing conventional ones. More fun. I will make up a fantasy league: a schedule between 32 countries with divisions, play a round robin ...then playoffs, etc. Sounds a bit ‘dumb’ but I start to get right into it and often can’t wait to hit the table.
Weirdo! Lol.
 

Black-Balled

AzB Silver Member
Silver Member
For the past few years I have not had the desire to play the game. Depression, personal problems, raising children, and working on business. Time is not always the issue as I have a table at home I could certainly devote a solid hour or so to it daily if not more with this covid situation but it just collects dust. Sold my playing cue because I was not playing. Once in awhile I will play at my friend Pete's house and Steve Glenn will stop by and play alittle too. Somewhere along the line my passion for the game just died off. I haven't spent much time on this forum either which I used to enjoy too. It seems most of you are all still here. I used to really love the game and want to find that desire to really play again. Anyone else have this happen and what changed it for you?
Look, sports fan...

Maybe you've come to the realization that pool really isn't that important or that great?

Imo, it is a hobby, a distraction to absorb your thoughts from the realities of being a grown-up.

Pool will be there when you feel like knocking some balls off the table.

Pool hall philosopher said to me once, 'when you are on your deathbed, you won't wish for another day at the pool room, you'll wish for another day with your loved ones'.

Tell you what helps me: to make up my own games, unique rules, than playing conventional ones. More fun. I will make up a fantasy league: a schedule between 32 countries with divisions, play a round robin ...then playoffs, etc. Sounds a bit ‘dumb’ but I start to get right into it and often can’t wait to hit the table.
 

Mr1Pocket

Registered
For the past few years I have not had the desire to play the game. Depression, personal problems, raising children, and working on business. Time is not always the issue as I have a table at home I could certainly devote a solid hour or so to it daily if not more with this covid situation but it just collects dust. Sold my playing cue because I was not playing. Once in awhile I will play at my friend Pete's house and Steve Glenn will stop by and play alittle too. Somewhere along the line my passion for the game just died off. I haven't spent much time on this forum either which I used to enjoy too. It seems most of you are all still here. I used to really love the game and want to find that desire to really play again. Anyone else have this happen and what changed it for you?
Learn something new (shot or game). Teach someone, igniting their spark might rub of on you and also twist the knife into someone you don't like might get that fire burning and blood boiling again. Extra money helps also.

You might need 1 or more of these. What was the reason for the desire in the first place. It's hungry, feed it!!!!!!!!!!!

Mike
 

sjm

Older and Wiser
Silver Member
Your experience is not uncommon.

I've played pool since 1969. I completed my collegiate studies in 1980. In the early part of my career, I lived on Long Island and drove in to Manhattan to my job. Most nights, I stopped at the Golden Q in Queens, NY on my drive home., One day, in about 1986, I came to the realization that this habit was not serving me well in my career, and I decided to discontinue going to the pool hall after work. Though I occasionally played pool in the daytime, I pretty much gave up pool for about seven years. In those seven years, my career took off, and once this had happened, I was able to return to the game, and the years 1994-2004 were definitely the years in which I played the game most seriously.

One's priorities can and often do change in life, and no matter how much you love pool, you may need or choose to deprioritize it temporarily, or even permanently. Unless pool is your career, if you are not inclined to pay many attentions to pool, that's perfectly OK. Live your life and if pool will again have a place in it, great. If not, it's also great.
 

Biloxi Boy

Man With A Golden Arm

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;

A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.
Ecclesiastes 3:1-8


Merry Christmas Everyone!

 

Fast Lenny

Faster Than You...
Silver Member
Took over 40 years off.
Played from age 14, taking public transportation all over Philadelphia to play in the rooms,
until I was about 20.
All I did was play pool and hang in poolrooms.
Went to college and sold my stick.
A Hoppe.
Everybody had one.

Sort of the same reasons, school, marriage, family, work.
The important stuff.
About 7 years ago my son came home with a cue.
The rest is history.
Bit all over again.

Lots of guys take time off for one reason or another.
Something will bring the passion back.
My son and I share cars as our common interest. That is awesome you are able to play pool with yours.
 

Fast Lenny

Faster Than You...
Silver Member
Same here, I went years without playing, had lost interest and suddenly out of nowhere it came back. My advice is not to force it, if you don’t enjoy it, just step away from it and hopefully you will find another hobby, or interest to fill the void. If no interest at all in anything then by all means seek professional help. Nothing to be ashamed of, we all go through those times in our life.
I have been working out a few times a week so that is a healthy thing but not sure if I can call it a hobby, haha.
 
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