Misunderstanding always starts with the writer's cognizance of what's coming across
This is a valuable lesson to learn people “skim” posts; only about ½ the people that read your post probably got to the bottom. I think you may have the same problem I had when I was young; I am a detail oriented person, the reality is that ½ - most people are not. How many people read:
1. The table of contents
2. The instruction/owners manual
3. The welcome page
How many? If you guessed 50% you’re dreaming; this is how people take in and process information; most people think they “are too smart to bother with all that” and most of those people are really on the lower end of the intelligence scale, but they think they are on the high end.
So when you posted “what is the purpose of having a pool instructor?” There were plenty of people that posted an answer to that. This will frustrate some people (it used to almost take me to the brink of madness because I read everything before doing anything). But this is not what people do; people want to “get to it”.
You should not be; you should learn from it, it has nothing to do with “YOU” per say it has to do with how people gather & process information; if you want to become an effective teacher you will have some “growing up to do” in this respect believe me I sure did when I started out.
You may not care to hear this but here is some real life advice <lower your expectations of people> Expect that people are:
1. Not going to read (at least not everything).
2. Not going to listen.
3. Not going to pat attention.
This will not only save you time but aggravation as well; I think others tried to say the same thing to you but just not in a nice way those are the people that don’t read, don’t listen, don’t pay attention and are confused as to why you would expect them to. They actually think like this “ME! Why would you expect ME to give YOU MY undivided attention???? Also most of these people think that 99.99% of THE WORLD thinks this way. These people are not stupid they are not a$$____s they represent about ½ the people on the planet. (depending on where you go; in some cultures these people are actually the minority.)
The good news is that those that want to take lessons are generally the other 50%, but every once in awhile you will run into one of these as your student; remember paid or not you took on that responsibility, and it is still your responsibility to teach them as long as they are paying you or the table time or you tell them flat out that you can’t.
Myrtle:
This is a good synopsis and advice from PGHteacher.
What you did wrong -- and are continuing to do wrong even in this thread -- is assume *YOU* did nothing wrong. But you did! Whenever you use phraseology like "what is the purpose..." of anything, whether you like it or not, you're posing a question about the validity of something's existence.
No matter how well you phrase it, no matter how well you position it, the concatenation of "what is" with "the purpose" results in this impression upon the reader.
Put it this way -- whenever you see something that strikes you as odd or out of place, what are the first words that pop into your head? Wouldn't "what is the purpose of that?" or "why is that there?" pop into your head?
Your "what is the purpose of an instructor" thread did just that -- it gave the reader the immediate impression that you were questioning the validity or "use" of an instructor. It doesn't matter that you go on to explain the real nature of your question in the post itself -- your intent was already dead on arrival.
You can blame the "human race" all you want, but until you look in the mirror to see your part in this, you're going to continue to make this mistake.
Take it from someone that does technical writing as part of his living. I architect huge enterprise networks, implement them, and then I have to document them. And when writing this hand-off / knowledge-transfer documentation, I've learned over the years to always ask myself, at just about every sentence, "how can someone f*** this up? What can *I* do to prevent people from misunderstanding and f***ing this up?" I've learned over the years that there are phrases in the English language to stay away from, because no matter how you use them -- in any context -- they will always be taken as something else. Your "what is the purpose..." is a grand example.
Food for thought, along with the waffles,
-Sean