What is a good way for a low-level player to handle unwanted advice?

MmmSharp

Nudge is as good as a wink to a blind bat.
Gold Member
Silver Member
My buddy always insists on giving advice. He is a good shot, better shot than me, so he think it is helpful. He does it with others as well and gets sad when people ignore his advice. When i am not in the mood for i just tell him i am not interested in learning that day. We always try to better ourselves but sometimes you just can not take advice.

If it is a random i say something like "thanks, but right now i am relaxing. Just banging balls." I had one guy being rudely insistent so i told him he should return to his table since he wasn't paying for my table time.
 

Jack Fate

Member
Sounds like a perfect hustle.

And giving the wrong advice makes it even better.

Just sit around tell people how to play until they get got enough to play you then unload. And when they lose tell them you tried to tell them how to play.

Kind of like a variation of the hoo-rah where you tell people you beat Efrem Days and willy macaroni and no one in the room can beat you..... Then they try it and lose and you say I told you that you couldn't win....
We played for nothing &never did play for anything.
I was grateful to get the experience up close & personal.
Now for the hustle part that’s another story….

Later ; )
 

hang-the-9

AzB Silver Member
Silver Member
I like playing pool, but I'm not good at it, and I get so much unsolicited advice from other players that it is starting to get on my nerves. Sometimes this happens even when I'm just practicing by myself - random strangers will come up and say I should do x, y, or z.

I know they're trying to be helpful, but sometimes I just want to bang balls around, and not be in school. I'm also suffering from information-overload, which has caused my play to suffer, as I am too aware of the 17,000 things I need to work on, and second-guessing a shot makes me miss and/or foul about 90% of the time.

And that's not to mention all of the bad or useless advice.

I also notice others giving their partner advice during doubles games, which almost invariably leads to the shooter missing, and sometimes leads to arguments between teammates. I call it "unintentional sharking."

I do appreciate that people are trying to be helpful, and that's nice, and sometimes I enjoy gleaning knowledge from better players, but I could use some advice about how to politely signal that I'm not in the mood for a pool lesson.

I'm one of those strangers that tries to help people out, especially if I see they are trying to get better but doing something wrong. I do ask if they are interested in some lessons or pointers, and almost never does someone say no. I mean if someone is doing something, why not try to do it better? And how can one get better without knowing how and knowing what is being done wrong. You won't learn to shoot a shot if you have no idea why it's not working except by total accident and then it's an accident to repeat the process to make it a second time.

Sometimes people love the advice, sometimes not. One thing I noticed, most women hate taking advice, while most guys are OK with it. Not sure why but there is something fundamentally different in the thought process because it's a huge and clear difference, I think women take advice as someone pointing out they are bad at a task while men take it as someone pointing out they can be better. Or maybe it's because it's a man giving advice and it's just a general negative kneejerk reaction.

I have probably created a dozen new regular players and a half dozen pretty close friends just from approaching people after league or just asking people to play and helping them with their game. The way I explain it to them "you need an asshole like me to tell you what you are doing wrong to get better" LOL Most of those guys are now playing in leagues with me or in general, and purchased cues and shafts after learning how things work, so it's an overall good thing I think trying to help people. I think if I did not approach them or started up conversations they would just be casual bangers instead of getting more interested in the sport.
 

pwd72s

recreational banger
Silver Member
Get a well known instructor's biz card...show it, then say "Thanks, but this guy is helping me and I don't want confusing advice"...

Actually, good instruction can serve anybody well. The pros use coaches...
 

easy-e

AzB Gold Member
Gold Member
Silver Member
I’ll give the advice-givers some advice: 99% of people you think you’re helping wish you would leave them alone. If it looks like they are happy that you’re talking to them, it’s just them being polite. Stop trying to “help” people who don’t ask for it.

***Yes, I already know 99% of you don’t care about this post and want me to go away, so I will😬.
 

maha

from way back when
Silver Member
truth is best as said. just say thanks but i dont want advice today.
if that offends them, tough as they entered your space.

if you dont mind advice just say okay show me how to do it go get a stick.

but if you have been playing for a decent amount of time in your life and cant run 15 balls scattered and open on the table you should be getting advice from someone competent.
 

Dead Money

AzB Gold Member
Gold Member
Silver Member
So people would find that difficult as it could hurt feelings. Truth is truth.

Yes..I hate to be rude so I often find myself the occasional victim of a "time waster." But what I suggested works about 99 % of the time and in more situations than just a pool hall.
 

middleofnowhere

Registered
I like playing pool, but I'm not good at it, and I get so much unsolicited advice from other players that it is starting to get on my nerves. Sometimes this happens even when I'm just practicing by myself - random strangers will come up and say I should do x, y, or z.

I know they're trying to be helpful, but sometimes I just want to bang balls around, and not be in school. I'm also suffering from information-overload, which has caused my play to suffer, as I am too aware of the 17,000 things I need to work on, and second-guessing a shot makes me miss and/or foul about 90% of the time.

And that's not to mention all of the bad or useless advice.

I also notice others giving their partner advice during doubles games, which almost invariably leads to the shooter missing, and sometimes leads to arguments between teammates. I call it "unintentional sharking."

I do appreciate that people are trying to be helpful, and that's nice, and sometimes I enjoy gleaning knowledge from better players, but I could use some advice about how to politely signal that I'm not in the mood for a pool lesson.
If you've ever owned a business you know one of the most common statements that you hear from people is, "You know what you should do"! While it usually comes from people who really don't know much of anything and their advice is often kind of dumb.

I'm inclined to listen to what people have to say cuz I never know what I'm going to hear. I had a guy tell me something one time and this was a guy living in his car, that made me almost $100,000. Another a quarter million. That one by the way came from Big Steve from NJ. It was even legal.

My wife used to get mad at me because I would talk with people who may even be somewhat bums.
 

Minnesota Phat

Active member
Thanks to all of you who replied. This is some great advice on how to avoid receiving advice! ;P

Some of the comments remind me that I often like getting advice - the times I like it are when I ask for it, or when a truly excellent player offers it (which is rare), or when it's done in a tactful, easily-digestible way. There was one guy I played a few times, and he said "That's an interesting open bridge - it's not necessarily bad, but most guys put their thumb against their middle knuckle." No other advice - just the one thing, just once, and he didn't insist I try it the standard way, and of course he was right.

Yesterday I was playing a friend who almost never chalks his stick, which is a break cue with a super-hard tip that really should be chalked between each shot, and he was miscuing A LOT. I tried subtle stuff like chalking it for him before I handed it to him, mentioning that it doesn't hold chalk well, etc., and eventually did say, "You really should chalk your stick."

He ignored my advice, and it was all I could do to refrain myself from lecturing/nagging him about how important it is to chalk your stick.

Anyway, advice given in the right way is actually a cool thing about pool, and when one of the money players who haunts my local pool halls deigns to share a nugget of billiards wisdom with me, I appreciate it a lot. It's actually kind of hard to get the best players to share advice - it's the middling ones who can be pushy and annoying about it, and it's the middling ones who tend to offer wrong or useless advice.

If it were Earl Strickland giving the advice, I'd want to hear everything he's willing to share.
 

Bavafongoul

AzB Silver Member
Silver Member
Thanks to all of you who replied. This is some great advice on how to avoid receiving advice! ;P

Some of the comments remind me that I often like getting advice - the times I like it are when I ask for it, or when a truly excellent player offers it (which is rare), or when it's done in a tactful, easily-digestible way. There was one guy I played a few times, and he said "That's an interesting open bridge - it's not necessarily bad, but most guys put their thumb against their middle knuckle." No other advice - just the one thing, just once, and he didn't insist I try it the standard way, and of course he was right.

Yesterday I was playing a friend who almost never chalks his stick, which is a break cue with a super-hard tip that really should be chalked between each shot, and he was miscuing A LOT. I tried subtle stuff like chalking it for him before I handed it to him, mentioning that it doesn't hold chalk well, etc., and eventually did say, "You really should chalk your stick."

He ignored my advice, and it was all I could do to refrain myself from lecturing/nagging him about how important it is to chalk your stick.

Anyway, advice given in the right way is actually a cool thing about pool, and when one of the money players who haunts my local pool halls deigns to share a nugget of billiards wisdom with me, I appreciate it a lot. It's actually kind of hard to get the best players to share advice - it's the middling ones who can be pushy and annoying about it, and it's the middling ones who tend to offer wrong or useless advice.

If it were Earl Strickland giving the advice, I'd want to hear everything he's willing to share.
You might also get a bill for an impromptu lesson fee.
 

Dead Money

AzB Gold Member
Gold Member
Silver Member
I’ll give the advice-givers some advice: 99% of people you think you’re helping wish you would leave them alone. If it looks like they are happy that you’re talking to them, it’s just them being polite. Stop trying to “help” people who don’t ask for it.

***Yes, I already know 99% of you don’t care about this post and want me to go away, so I will😬.
Thank you for the help............. 🤣 🤣 🤣
 

ChrisinNC

AzB Silver Member
Silver Member
I like playing pool, but I'm not good at it, and I get so much unsolicited advice from other players that it is starting to get on my nerves. Sometimes this happens even when I'm just practicing by myself - random strangers will come up and say I should do x, y, or z.

I know they're trying to be helpful, but sometimes I just want to bang balls around, and not be in school. I'm also suffering from information-overload, which has caused my play to suffer, as I am too aware of the 17,000 things I need to work on, and second-guessing a shot makes me miss and/or foul about 90% of the time.

And that's not to mention all of the bad or useless advice.

I also notice others giving their partner advice during doubles games, which almost invariably leads to the shooter missing, and sometimes leads to arguments between teammates. I call it "unintentional sharking."

I do appreciate that people are trying to be helpful, and that's nice, and sometimes I enjoy gleaning knowledge from better players, but I could use some advice about how to politely signal that I'm not in the mood for a pool lesson.
It should depend on who the advice is coming from. If it is coming from someone who likely knows what they are talking about, you should welcome it, even if you didn’t ask for it and even if you don’t really want to give it a try at that moment.

It’s particularly worth noting if they just mention one thing they suggest you need to work on rather than numerous things. Any experienced instructor knows that with most players, you can only really work on one change at a time as opposed to bombarding them with numerous suggestions.
 

CocoboloCowboy

Cowboys are my hero's
Silver Member
Yes..I hate to be rude so I often find myself the occasional victim of a "time waster." But what I suggested works about 99 % of the time and in more situations than just a pool hall.


Some people only get rude blunt reply. We had this guy who was so aggressive with his free advise, he could not understand. No thx.
 

Dan White

AzB Silver Member
Silver Member
Sometimes people love the advice, sometimes not. One thing I noticed, most women hate taking advice, while most guys are OK with it. Not sure why but there is something fundamentally different in the thought process because it's a huge and clear difference, I think women take advice as someone pointing out they are bad at a task while men take it as someone pointing out they can be better. Or maybe it's because it's a man giving advice and it's just a general negative kneejerk reaction.
Hmm... When you instruct a woman do your sentences happen to begin with, "Now Honey let me show you..." or "Look Sweetie, what you have to do is..." or maybe even, "Now aren't you just the cutest thing doin' it all wrong. Here, lemme show you how..."

Just a thought... :ROFLMAO:
 

sellingboe

Active member
If you've ever owned a business you know one of the most common statements that you hear from people is, "You know what you should do"! While it usually comes from people who really don't know much of anything and their advice is often kind of dumb.

I'm inclined to listen to what people have to say cuz I never know what I'm going to hear. I had a guy tell me something one time and this was a guy living in his car, that made me almost $100,000. Another a quarter million. That one by the way came from Big Steve from NJ. It was even legal.

My wife used to get mad at me because I would talk with people who may even be somewhat bums.
Some of the most brilliant inventions were a result of an accidental or unexpected outcome. One never knows where a golden nugget is going to come from. So diverting from my snarky answer above for a moment, evaluate and either ask for more... or deftly move on (lots of ideas on how above).
 

ShootingArts

Smorg is giving St Peter the 7!
Gold Member
Silver Member
Hmm... When you instruct a woman do your sentences happen to begin with, "Now Honey let me show you..." or "Look Sweetie, what you have to do is..." or maybe even, "Now aren't you just the cutest thing doin' it all wrong. Here, lemme show you how..."

Just a thought... :ROFLMAO:


I have always found women more willing to take advice. Of course the first question when approaching someone that didn't ask for help is if they would like a little help.

I was trying to make an aiming system work. It worked OK shooting to one side, not at all to the other! I was positioning the cue ball about a foot behind the middle pockets and the object ball at the second diamond about an inch off the rail. After swapping sides I proceeded to miss the shot about nine times out of ten for about fifteen minutes! Finally a guy I saw around the pool hall now and then couldn't stand any more and came over. "Let me show you how to make that ball!" He couldn't understand that I was trying to make it using a certain technique and could make it with no problem if I chose. After ten minutes or so he went away obviously thinking I was too proud to take advice!

Hu
 
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