Where has the Wanted/FS section courtesy gone?

StrokeofLuck

StrokeofLuck

AzB Silver Member
Silver Member
Not a huge deal to me and I know it's been brought up before, but what's with the lack of decency to just give someone a response these days??

I have a case for sale and a member (I won't name any names) here gave me a low offer on it and that's fine. I get that people have a price they'll pay and that's that. I responded yesterday saying I would split the difference and gave a price back that I would accept.

In the meantime, someone comes through to buy it at my asking price and I tell them I had already offered it to someone else and was awaiting a response. Nothing all day yesterday (and the person has been online) and this morning I tell the other party that we have a deal, well they bought a different case last night, so I''m out the sale.

I was willing to accept less from a member here with good iTrader and did the good faith thing of standing by my offer and not selling it out to the higher bidder, and I can't even get a "no that's all I'm offering" or "that's my top dollar." Even if I'm just kind of kicking a tire, I always say thanks for the info or can't do it at this time. Seems like the right thing to do to me.

I guess common courtesy is becoming less of the norm.:frown:
 
You are exactly right in your expectations and it is just a lack of decency as you say. Unfortunately there seem to be very few people left who care about anyone else or in doing the right thing. Most people's ethics and morals are lower than yours.

Based on previous threads along these lines you are going to get a bunch of responses that essentially say that you should have just sold the case to the guy that offered you your asking price and screw the other guy because there wasn't a deal yet (and half of them would tell you to renege on the deal even if there was one and take the new higher offer). They will say it is your fault for missing out on that sale.

What you might do in the future is to say in your response to any inquiry that you "will not hold the item off the market due to any ongoing negotiations or any promises to pay and that your item will go to the first person to put money in your hands in the amount that you told them you would let it go for". You should probably put that in your initial sales post also. Making that clear covers you from missing out on deals like you did here and you are still doing the right thing so your conscience is covered too.
 
Don't get me started.

I have a high end cue in the for sale section and get the following IM's weekly, i reply usually the same day then hear nothing. No respect.

Then you have the folks selling 100 cues, they bump all their stuff at once and blow out everyone else. I'd like to see a cap on how many for sale threads one person could have open at one time. If you have multiple cues, place them all in one thread.

I'll respectfully stop my complaining here...
 
im the the one the op is talking about so i will put this all in public
also strokeofluck
you did this diplomatically and when im done with my post ill give you a greenie for that
:thumbup:
i was buying this for a friend
and i texted him about it as i offered my price strokeofluck countered
and i was waiting for my friend to tell me if he wanted the case or not
if another buyer came along
i would have told the buyer the case is yours
once i didnt respond to your counter the case is still up for sale to me
i would never have accused you of selling the case when "we had a deal"
im sorry if i didnt explain that to you
and if that was improper i apologize
just to show you my intention was honorable i will buy it for your last offer to me..:wink:
even tho i havent heard from my friend and i may be stuck with a case i dont need
check your pm
give me your pay pal and the deal is done
 
That happens all the time, guys just throwing out offers hoping that some of them stick.
I never get a response when I counter the lowball offer unless it is from someone I know.
Sometimes I don't even get a response when I accept the lowball offer.
I think some guys get high and want every cue they see, and when they come down they realize that they're broke.


:smile:
 
You should have sold it to the other buyer. Money talks and bs walks. That is the thing about haggling. Until you both come to a mutual agreement, the item is still for sale.

Thus, you shot him an offer back, and he never accepted. Until he accepted, it's still for sale in my book.
 
ChicagoRJ said:
You should have sold it to the other buyer. Money talks and bs walks. That is the thing about haggling. Until you both come to a mutual agreement, the item is still for sale.

Thus, you shot him an offer back, and he never accepted. Until he accepted, it's still for sale in my book.
Click to expand...

This...........................................
 
bbb said:
im the the one the op is talking about so i will put this all in public
also strokeofluck
you did this diplomatically and when im done with my post ill give you a greenie for that
:thumbup:
i was buying this for a friend
and i texted him about it as i offered my price strokeofluck countered
and i was waiting for my friend to tell me if he wanted the case or not
if another buyer came along
i would have told the buyer the case is yours
once i didnt respond to your counter the case is still up for sale to me
i would never have accused you of selling the case when "we had a deal"
im sorry if i didnt explain that to you
and if that was improper i apologize
just to show you my intention was honorable i will buy it for your last offer to me..:wink:
even tho i havent heard from my friend and i may be stuck with a case i dont need
check your pm
give me your pay pal and the deal is done
Click to expand...

ChicagoRJ said:
You should have sold it to the other buyer. Money talks and bs walks. That is the thing about haggling. Until you both come to a mutual agreement, the item is still for sale.

Thus, you shot him an offer back, and he never accepted. Until he accepted, it's still for sale in my book.
Click to expand...
Triple B is making it right....and he's not entirely wrong...classy move.

And I agree with RJ
 
If I come to an agreement with a buyer on a sale it's their's. They have to pay that day. If not the first to pay gets the item. I'm not going to sacrifice a sale for tire kickers.
 
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bbb said:
im the the one the op is talking about so i will put this all in public
also strokeofluck
you did this diplomatically and when im done with my post ill give you a greenie for that
:thumbup:
i was buying this for a friend
and i texted him about it as i offered my price strokeofluck countered
and i was waiting for my friend to tell me if he wanted the case or not
if another buyer came along
i would have told the buyer the case is yours
once i didnt respond to your counter the case is still up for sale to me
i would never have accused you of selling the case when "we had a deal"
im sorry if i didnt explain that to you
and if that was improper i apologize
just to show you my intention was honorable i will buy it for your last offer to me..:wink:
even tho i havent heard from my friend and i may be stuck with a case i dont need
check your pm
give me your pay pal and the deal is done
Click to expand...

Very nice, good job.
 
bbb said:
once i didnt respond to your counter the case is still up for sale to me
Click to expand...
The problem is how do you define "once I didn't respond to your offer"? How does the person selling an item know whether or not you just haven't responded yet but are still going to? Should they assume (because that is all it is, they have no way to know) that you aren't going to respond back after one minute has passed? One hour? One day? One week? One year? See the problem?

Because nobody can read minds people don't know if you are still planning to respond or not and there really isn't such a thing as "once I didn't respond". Obviously at some point they will figure it out, but not before enough time has passed that someone with the integrity to wait for the person they were dealing with to get back to them might end up losing out on other deal opportunities. Like the OP, I feel an obligation to wait a reasonable amount of time to hear back from the person I was dealing with before being willing to sell it to someone else. I too think it is the right thing to to.

And this isn't really directed at you because you apparently had a good reason for not having responded yet, but the simple solution is just to respond back to people with a "no thanks" or "I changed my mind" or whatever. It is the courteous thing to do, and the right thing to do. Don't leave someone hanging. Yes I get the "you shouldn't have passed up another sale opportunity while you were waiting" argument but it still doesn't mean that people shouldn't be responding back with at least a "no thanks". Don't leave it up in the air. The is no reason to. If you decided you are done negotiating and are moving on, then just say so. It is just simple common courtesy to at least give a "no thanks".
 
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I had an experience i wanted to share. I have made the mistake of holding things for people when i shouldnt have. I rarely do that anymore and tell people the first person with the money gets it.

I recently decided to upgrade my home table.

I had an old beat up us billiards bar box. I found a buyer fairly quickly. He needed to go over things with his wife and said he was very interested. A week goes by and i email him, he replies that he is still very interested. I get a few more hits on my ad but had agreed to sell it to this guy and he was willing to pay my asking price. Another week goes by and i email him again. Yup, still interested.

A day later i get an email from someone else saying they will pickup the table that day. I pass again and at this point the table i wanted to buy has sold - decent brunswick dakota for $800 and another one i was looking at. I email the guy and say i need a date the table is being picked up or the next offer gets it. The next day he shows up at my door and hands me the full asking price plus an extra $50 for "putting up with him". He picked up the table later that week.

At this point i am happy it is gone but sad the table i wanted was sold. I go check the local for sale and see a newly listed "brunswick billiards table" for $800 (canadian) that looks an awful lot like a gold crown. I immediately call and say i want to see it and put a deposit down if it is in good condition. Turns out it was a gold crown in excellent condition.

I bought it and after selling my old table, the "put up with me" money and selling the cues, etc that came with the gold crown it only ran me an extra $150 plus the setup fee.

This is the exception to the rule but if i hadnt waited for the original offer i wouldnt have received more than my asking price and would have bought a different table.

Anyways, hope that was an interesting story :)
 
Poolplaya9 said:
The problem is how do you define "once I didn't respond to your offer"? How does the person selling an item know whether or not you just haven't responded yet but are still going to? Should they assume (because that is all it is, they have no way to know) that you aren't going to respond back after one minute has passed? One hour? One day? One week? One year? See the problem?

Because nobody can read minds people don't know if you are still planning to respond or not and there really isn't such a thing as "once I didn't respond". Obviously at some point they will figure it out, but not before enough time has passed that someone with the integrity to wait for the person they were dealing with to get back to them might end up losing out on other deal opportunities. Like the OP, I feel an obligation to wait a reasonable amount of time to hear back from the person I was dealing with before being willing to sell it to someone else. I too think it is the right thing to to.

And this isn't really directed at you because you apparently had a good reason for not having responded yet, but the simple solution is just to respond back to people with a "no thanks" or "I changed my mind" or whatever. It is the courteous thing to do, and the right thing to do. Don't leave someone hanging. Yes I get the "you shouldn't have passed up another sale opportunity while you were waiting" argument but it still doesn't mean that people shouldn't be responding back with at least a "no thanks". Don't leave it up in the air. The is no reason to. If you decided you are done negotiating and are moving on, then just say so. It is just simple common courtesy to at least give a "no thanks".
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fwiw
it took the op 2 days to respond to my pm
what if i saw another case at a better price in those 2 days
should i be obligated since i made an offer and was waiting for a reply??
also i posted at 836 pm yesterday
according to statistics on the op he was last on the site at 904pm yesterday
i still dont have a reply from him
 
Larry, thanks for coming on here and offering that up. I find it interesting that people say I should've sold it to the guy with the cash because I've seen others get skewered on here for doing that exact thing and the "oh you have an obligation to hold it to the person you offered it to" "a written agreement", etc.

Anyway the point of my thread was more general than just BBB. It happens too much on here. It takes a few seconds to say no thanks or give some kind of a response, whether buyer or seller.

Larry, my final comments are this. First, when I went to bump the thread I saw your post in there and as I said, there was no PM from you so I sent you one. Check your "sent items" and I'm guessing there isn't one in there. If there is, some kind of AZ glitch?? I never got one because I always respond ASAP and I check on Tapatalk too.

Secondly, I appreciate your offer but I don't need you to buy a case you don't need. It's not like I need it to feed my family or something. I'll continue the sale for a while and if it doesn't move, I'll try something else or hang on to it. So like I said, thanks and no hard feelings on my end.

I'll send you a PM too. :wink2:
 
bbb said:
fwiw
it took the op 2 days to respond to my pm
what if i saw another case at a better price in those 2 days
should i be obligated since i made an offer and was waiting for a reply??
also i posted at 836 pm yesterday
according to statistics on the op he was last on the site at 904pm yesterday
i still dont have a reply from him
Click to expand...

It is real simple. When either side is done negotiating and are no longer interested in the deal, they should say so. Everybody wins that way. The people that feel some kind of obligation to wait, buyer or seller, then know when to move on. And for the people that never felt any obligation to wait, getting word that the other party is no longer interested in the transaction doesn't hurt them a bit. Plus it is just common human decency and courtesy which we should all be doing anyway.
 
StrokeofLuck said:
Not a huge deal to me and I know it's been brought up before, but what's with the lack of decency to just give someone a response these days??

I have a case for sale and a member (I won't name any names) here gave me a low offer on it and that's fine. I get that people have a price they'll pay and that's that. I responded yesterday saying I would split the difference and gave a price back that I would accept.

In the meantime, someone comes through to buy it at my asking price and I tell them I had already offered it to someone else and was awaiting a response. Nothing all day yesterday (and the person has been online) and this morning I tell the other party that we have a deal, well they bought a different case last night, so I''m out the sale.

I was willing to accept less from a member here with good iTrader and did the good faith thing of standing by my offer and not selling it out to the higher bidder, and I can't even get a "no that's all I'm offering" or "that's my top dollar." Even if I'm just kind of kicking a tire, I always say thanks for the info or can't do it at this time. Seems like the right thing to do to me.

I guess common courtesy is becoming less of the norm.:frown:
Click to expand...

happens to me all the time
the facebook groups are even worse
one good thing about fb though... you KNOW the message was read.
when i respond to a prvt message and i see its read and get no response back, F 'em, wont ever respond to them again :p
 
I honestly don't see that you guys had any kinda deal. IMO when you refused his low ball , even with a counter offer there still was no deal. Only way I would feel differently is if in your counter offer u said somethimg like u have one day to decide or whatever. First come first serve in my eyes unless something else was stipulated and acknowledged. Like you said low ball is fine, but that doesn't give someone dibs or rights to anything. If he wanted it and wanted the rights to it should have just paid full price because we all know there is always risk of losing the deal when we are making offers as opposed to just buying on the spot.
 
cuesblues said:
Sometimes I don't even get a response when I accept the lowball offer.
I think some guys get high and want every cue they see, and when they come down they realize that they're broke.

I think this may have a chance for funniest / best post of the year!
Click to expand...
 
Lately I've have a few guys lowball me on offers (big purchases too) and when I accepted, they air barreled the deals. As the older collectors become less involved in the hobby, the quality of buyers out there has greatly diminished. It use to be buyer beware....now it's seller beware !!!!!
 
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