What is the best excuse you've heard?

jlrowe

jlrowe

Billiards,Boxing & Babes
Silver Member
What is the best excuse you have heard from your opponent because they missed a shot? I was shooting with a guy and he missed a shot that he slow rolled long rail. He acts mad and goes to the end of the table where i have a ceiling fan and turns it off. He said that i had the fan on to high and it was blowing on the table and it caused the ball to drift.:killingme:
 
When someone has ball-in-hand, and misses the shot, I've always loved saying, "what, did you have a bad angle?"





chris G<----------Kills em'.:grin-square:
 
There's a guy around here who has never missed a ball unless something caused it to happen. Usually it's just the table rolling off or some other standard excuse, however he occasionally gets really inventive.

He once missed a ball because the establishment owner had the back door open, and that caused the humidity to increase, thereby affecting the table.
 
bradsh98 said:
Ha! I hate it when that happens...
Click to expand...



I love it when it happens!
biglaugh.gif
 
I had been whooping on a guy for a while who had a nice case with a break cue, jump cue, and playing cue. He came up with this gem, "one time a guy wanted to play for $500, so I went home and got my good cues and beat him. See these here are just my practice cues."
 
My favorite

My favorite excuse is to proclaim the cue ball is warped. I came up with that after listening to all of the wild excuses other people give instead of an honest "I missed". The funny thing is that many people seem to accept the warped cue ball idea! I know they are really on the hook when they pick it up and study it after a game.

Hu
 
I once made the Excuse a Sexy Blond wiggled in front of my shot and caused me to miss a Lame Duck. Now the heck of it was, I actually stood up and waited for her to wiggle on by. But my focus was so blown I still missed the Duck. Now the question you might be asking is. Was she all that Sexy or was I all that horny? I believe it was both.
 
I like to ask my opponent after an easy miss... " ya know why you missed that shot?" (they look at me interested ) "Because the pockets over there!"
 
my fav.

:scratchhead:


" I forgot to allow for the earth's rotation"


:scratchhead:
 
Typhoon room

:shrug:
jlrowe said:
What is the best excuse you have heard from your opponent because they missed a shot? I was shooting with a guy and he missed a shot that he slow rolled long rail. He acts mad and goes to the end of the table where i have a ceiling fan and turns it off. He said that i had the fan on to high and it was blowing on the table and it caused the ball to drift.:killingme:
Click to expand...

I know a local sports bar that has a separate room that we call the TYPHOON ROOM due to the oversized (used to feed a much larger space) A/C dump that blows straight down on the table. You do have to hit em crisp to avoid roll off.

Re your fan-if the guys a regular-he should be already be aware of the wind patterns affecting the table and has no basis to complain.

QUESTION? Did you crank up 'your' fan just before he shot this slow roller?

3raillkick

'no ill wind blows for the ship without a destination'
 
"Warped cue ball" idea with a twist

ShootingArts said:
My favorite excuse is to proclaim the cue ball is warped. I came up with that after listening to all of the wild excuses other people give instead of an honest "I missed". The funny thing is that many people seem to accept the warped cue ball idea! I know they are really on the hook when they pick it up and study it after a game.

Hu
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Hu:

You should have one of these in your bag when you want to use this excuse:

http://poolndarts.com/p-3625-Crazy-Cue-Ball/

I have one of these (was a "spoof" gift from a friend), and I gotta tell ya, I have a lot of fun with it -- especially during "funsy" ring games with a couple of those excuse makers. Whenever you have one of these, "did you see the table roll-off that shot on me?" excuse-maker types on the line, finagle a way to get this cue ball onto the table without him seeing. I *guarantee* your sides will hurt after trying to hide your laughter. The amazing thing is, this cue ball actually ends up shutting 'em up!

-Sean
 
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