Watching loved ones be picked apart on social media is never easy. Parents, family members, and close friends feel it deeply, often more deeply than the person being discussed. I get that. Ask me how I know.
Recently, strong opinions were shared on a Window's Open podcast about a Billy Thorpe Jr.'s style, strength, and even his place on a future Mosconi Cup Team USA. Billy Thorpe Sr. (Billy Jr.'s dad) made a rant-filled post on Facebook sharing his thoughts about the Window's Open owner/founder (M.M.) for sharing his opinions about Billy Jr. Of course, he loves his son and is very proud. Opinions come with the territory in competitive sports, but they don’t always land lightly, especially when they involve someone’s child, sibling, or partner. The Thorpe family is incredibly proud of Billy, and rightly so, not just for how powerfully he plays pool, but for the man he is, which is family-oriented, hardworking, and entrepreneurial.
I happen to like and respect all parties involved here. I like the Window’s Open founder/owner (M.M.), and I also like the entire Thorpe family. That’s exactly why this is worth saying that reading disparaging words about people you love can tear a hole in your heart. Replying to an opinionated post you do not agree with rarely helps when it is about someone you love. It doesn't change minds, and it often amplifies the negativity. Silence, restraint, and perspective are learned skills. They take years to build, and I still struggle with it from time to time.
We can disagree. We can debate performance, style, and decisions, and people are entitled to their opinions, of course. But remembering the human beings and families behind the headlines and opinions goes a long way too. The pool culture is a small one, and we know each player much more so than we would, say, a famous golfer or baseball player. We interact with them and even their families on social media in this pool world. Sometimes the strongest response from a family member or loved one is no response at all.
A good example of this is how Joshua Filler handled the cyberbullying on social media when he was attacked viciously ad nauseum for changing his mind about which tournament he was going to compete in. He said nothing, responded to nothing, and continued on with his pool career full speed ahead. He is the epitome of social media maturity. A year later, he's back on the Mosconi Cup team. Silence is golden sometimes.