I also asked friends at the wake regarding stores
or articles on newspapers on what happened - feeling
that I may have failed to read everything and all.
But they, too, found nothing.
I have pictures from the wake. I asked Edwin's
wife and mother, with the help of Sputnik (one of Edwin's
close friends) if I could take pictures. They agreed.
I never took pics from such. But somehow, i felt bringing
my camera to the wake - and bought it along I did.
Why I took the pics? For us all? For friends?
For Edwin? For Edwin's fans? For Edwin's family?
For Edwin's supporters? For Edwin's enemies? For something?
For everything?
Honestly, it could be all of the above. When i received the
"go signal" to take pics, 'twas like about 20 minutes before i
actually opened my camera bag and take out my gear.
I don't know why. I guess part of him didn't want to do it
because sadness was all over the air.
Initially, I didnt want to take pics of the faces inside the chapel.
Maybe it was because I didn't want to see sadness immortalized
on photographs? Perhaps.
After about 8-10 minutes, I went outside. I smoked. And smoked
another. Friends were saying something, but truth be told, half
of the time (I guess) i was just nodding or something to what
they were saying. I was still like confused on how such brutality
can be done - at an instant. I mean, we are talking about the life
of a human being here. A father. A husband. A friend to everyone.
I went back inside the chapel and sat in the back row. From where
i was sitting, i got a very good look on what was happening around me.
And I saw Edwin's children - ages 8, 6 and 4. God! They are still
babies in my book! I felt mixed emotions and a fuzzy feeling in
my throat. To senselessly take away their father from them - that I could not comprehend!
Was it worth it? Edwin's death? Seeing his children and wife helped me find the answer to the question.
Then something hit me - like saying to take pictures - beautiful pictures
for the children to see someday. Understand what happened. And help
them know what their father meant to other people - to see the real
Edwin - how much he is loved and all. That perhaps such would help
them realize how much Edwin loved them and mean to him.
I got my camera. And pressed the shutter. Pressed it again.
And again. And again. And again. However, i didnt take pics
of Edwin's face inside the coffin. I could have. But I didn't want to.
I guess i want to remember him on how he looked like when he
was still alive - all smiles - every single time.
I know i am rambling now. No worrying about grammar, punctuations,
nothing. I am rambling.
Sputnik made a request.
You have sites Anito.
Yes, I do.
You have sites right.
Ok.
I will only ask you one thing.
What is that? Anything.
Help Edwin's children with their schooling. Via events. tournaments.
_ _ _ _ _ (this part I could not hear anymore because a thousand
thoughts were rushing through my mind wiith regards to the request.
I suddenly remember the many people, friends, acquiantances, and persons i do not know saying that i have what is something different
- the power of information via the Internet.
I never looked at it that way. For me, this is about my passion.
A passion that has generated a lot for me in terms of friendship,
knowledge, and more.
But somehow, the request further shed light to what the sites
should be alll about.
Can i do it? Can we? Can i fulfill the request? Can we fulfill such?
Edwin, kabayan, you never turned down a request. This i ask you
now, kabayan: Help me help them. They are so little pa, kabayan.
8, 6, and 4 years old. I was so saddened with the cruelty they did!
The perpetrators of the crime have robbed the children something
from their lives. Am so saddened by this fact! I am no fool to believe
that the perpetrator/s didn't know you have such young kids.
It's very evil what they did! PURE EVIL that it is so sickening!
i am rambling i know. this is a few of those times.,
Edwin, i and the rest of your friends will do everthing we can
so that you and what you stood for will not be forgetten.
Thank you for being our light in this tiring times.
Thank you for everything.
.
