I lost 2 friends

1pocket said:
I was going to say, a cardinal rule for survival in pooroom culture: Never acknowledge that anything anyone does actually gets to your game -- otherwise it will sooner or later be used against you.
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There's an old boy in my hometown, long the best 1 hole player,
who refuses to engage in small talk while playing.
I am easily drawn in to talking to guys on the sideline.
I am trying hard to stop but I'm a sociable guy.
It's hard to teach an old, dumb dog new tricks.
 
crawfish said:
Sometimes, when playing with "friends," one is taking it more seriously than the other. I have a practice friend that, on a given day, either one of us can run over the other if we catch that "gear." It's hard to focus when playing with your buds. That is WHY I always advocate a buck or two to make sure both of you are playing serious. Bragging rights is enough for some; but, I like to have free dinner and pool time. If those guys are really friends, they understand how serious it is for you and will respect that. If they don't, get the game a ball in your favor and jack it up! I mean, are these guys you'd go camping with along with your family? If not, they are "poolroom" friends, and there will ALWAYS be more "poolroom" friends. Screw'em.
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Joe was a poolroom friend who I went to DCC with twice.
Eddie was a very good friend at one time. We had drifted
apart because his wife thinks I'm Satan incarnate.
Even when we were close friends, Eddie always had a history
of running his mouth and distracting me while I was playing.
The political comments seemed a particularly cheap shot
and I finally blew up.
 
Always more.

hondo said:
Joe was a poolroom friend who I went to DCC with twice.
Eddie was a very good friend at one time. We had drifted
apart because his wife thinks I'm Satan incarnate.
Even when we were close friends, Eddie always had a history
of running his mouth and distracting me while I was playing.
The political comments seemed a particularly cheap shot
and I finally blew up.
Click to expand...
Gosh, you might never meet other friends. I'd give up pool and friends. Come on....if they don't come around and try to make amends, write'em off. The poolrooms will always provide entertainment, and friends. Really...... are these friends the guys you'd have dinner with your parents and let date your sister, or just pool acquaintences? Either way, they'll come around, or not. Things happen for a reason. They might be trying to keep you in your place... down. You know. Might be a blessing to find out now. Head up and cue in hand.
 
Hondo,

I have two questions.

Why do you value them as "friends" ?

Do you believe they placed as much value in your friendship?


Personally, I don't need to consider anyone a friend to play a set with them, although I admit to prefering my time is spent with players i consider "friends".

Maybe you could try and compartmentalize these emotional issues, as they are personal and nobody else's business.
 
hondo said:
A few shots later Eddie yells out what a great job
he thinks Bush is doing. Joe agrees and they start going on
about Bush's greatness being secure.

Was I wrong?
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Hondo,
You were WRONG. Bush is a great band, and their place in rock and roll history is secure.

P.S. - If you weren't playing for money; then perhaps you were a bit too serious. If you were playing for money, you have some tough adversaries (NOT friends).

P.P.S. - You probably would NOT like Monday night "full contact" pool in Betmore's Basement. For Monday night football nights, our pool games permit all sharking, yelling, criticizing, and woofing. Poking your opponent gently with a cue while they are shooting is not uncommon. It definitely improves one's ability to shut out distractions.
 
The same thing happened to me. I have a group of friends that play once a week. They like the game but are there mostly there for the cold beer and friendship.
All manner of joking and distraction are allowed.
Being one of the better players I was picked out for a little more needling than the rest of the guys. I take my game pretty serious and I got mad and I let them know I was mad.
As much as I know they were baiting me, I also know they never expected me to take it so seriously.
As it turns out I think we were both wrong. They needed to back off some and I needed to play a little less seriously in this setting.
I told them this the next week and we seem to be able to move on , play pool and have fun.
 
In that situation, I can't see letting any topic get me that steamed up. It sounds more to me like they were just messing with you for fun, and it got out of hand. Probably bad timing on their part given the competetive nature of the game, but maybe an over reaction by you. Politics are an important topic, but don't have to be taken seriously, if not meant seriously. Also, if you react that way all the time, you make yourself an easy target. Of course, I was not there to see the nature of the actual events, so who knows. If others in the room felt you over reacted though, it may simply be that you took it more seriously than they meant it. Who knows. Good luck repairing the relationship. I can't imagine that would ruin it for good.
 
Williebetmore said:
Hondo,
You were WRONG. Bush is a great band, and their place in rock and roll history is secure.

P.S. - If you weren't playing for money; then perhaps you were a bit too serious. If you were playing for money, you have some tough adversaries (NOT friends).

P.P.S. - You probably would NOT like Monday night "full contact" pool in Betmore's Basement. For Monday night football nights, our pool games permit all sharking, yelling, criticizing, and woofing. Poking your opponent gently with a cue while they are shooting is not uncommon. It definitely improves one's ability to shut out distractions.
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Ouch! It sounds like a jungle down there!:)
 
teebee said:
The same thing happened to me. I have a group of friends that play once a week. They like the game but are there mostly there for the cold beer and friendship.
All manner of joking and distraction are allowed.
Being one of the better players I was picked out for a little more needling than the rest of the guys. I take my game pretty serious and I got mad and I let them know I was mad.
As much as I know they were baiting me, I also know they never expected me to take it so seriously.
As it turns out I think we were both wrong. They needed to back off some and I needed to play a little less seriously in this setting.
I told them this the next week and we seem to be able to move on , play pool and have fun.
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Very good post. In my situation, however, Joe has decided that I'm
a hothead whom he has no desire to play anymore and Eddie
only came back once & was very cool.
When I've tried to discuss it with Joe he doesn't seem to think
my side of the story has any validity.
 
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mantis99 said:
In that situation, I can't see letting any topic get me that steamed up. It sounds more to me like they were just messing with you for fun, and it got out of hand. Probably bad timing on their part given the competetive nature of the game, but maybe an over reaction by you. Politics are an important topic, but don't have to be taken seriously, if not meant seriously. Also, if you react that way all the time, you make yourself an easy target. Of course, I was not there to see the nature of the actual events, so who knows. If others in the room felt you over reacted though, it may simply be that you took it more seriously than they meant it. Who knows. Good luck repairing the relationship. I can't imagine that would ruin it for good.
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Well, I don't react that way usually. My poolroom is often as bad as
Williebetmore's basement. It was this particular ploy that set me
off. I'll be ready for it next time if there is a next time.:(
 
I'm occasionally in the exact same boat. People say I'm touchy but I think the rest of the world can just be dickheads sometimes :P

Sometimes there's a difference between how you're seeing a situation and how they are... you feel like it's button-pushing and baiting and they think it's friendly ribbing, and they have no idea how much it's bugging you until you blow up. If the game isn't for money, a lot of people feel that anything is fair game. Gotta remember that some of the guys you shoot might play as often as you, but somehow don't take it half as seriously.

That being said, I expect people to follow the unwritten rules about being quiet during shots. I hardly can even carry on a regular friendly chat while I'm focused on shooting. A common conversation between one of my best friends goes something like:

(guy in the chair starts telling random story)
shooter: uh huh... (ignores)
(guy in the chair keeps prattling on and shooter misses a ball)
shooter: THAT'S GREAT. I should played that ball with low shut the f*ck up!

Two people watching us might think "omg these guys are pissed" but this is how we joke with each other. We both have come to accept that the urge to chitchat is hard to keep down and if it messes up a runout... oh well, it's just a friendly game anyway.

But, if either of us is clearly bothered and actually says something along the lines of "quiet please" then we always respect it. Doesn't prevent it from coming up again later.

I think your buddies should have shut up and I think especially that the guy who said "I'm never gonna play you again" overreacted. Get cooler friends.
 
Grow up, Hondo

Playing pool is a grown up game. Russ almost got you into a shouting match just by mentioning Bush.

If a little bit of baiting is enough to throw you off your game, there's nothing anyone can do to keep you from acting like a little immature kid who's always having a temper tantrum.

I must remind myself if I ever get in a money match with Hondo to just pretend to talk on my cell phone about Bush. I'd say "Dave, I heard you got to meet President Bush yesterday." and Hondo would stand up, glare at me, then probably unscrew his cue and run off crying. LOL!

:p

Hondo was the name of a book written by Louis Lamour and was filmed starring John Wayne. Now that I've informed the rest of the AZers of the history of that fine name, why are you acting like a wuss-boy?

Standing by to teach manliness to those males who lack it...

The Woim
 
hondo said:
I was playing one pocket with Joe, who I have gone to
DCC with the last 2 years. I was beating him, which I
rarely do anymore.
Another good friend, Eddie, who enjoys messing with me,
is watching the game.
I have a long difficult shot. As I start to hit the ball, Eddie yells
something. I stop and ask Eddie why he's always doing something
like that. A few shots later Eddie yells out what a great job
he thinks Bush is doing. Joe agrees and they start going on
about Bush's greatness being secure.
Both were well aware of how I feel. I start arguing with them
and suddenly I can't make a ball.
I accuse Eddie of doing this deliberately to mess with me.
After all, why bring this topic, a sore point with me, up in
the middle of the game? I call Eddie an a**hole. Joe quits,
says he'll never play with me again.
Both are portraying me as the sorehead and both friendships
appear lost.
Was I wrong? My wife & oldest son feel that they were baiting me.
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I'm available for the eulogy . . .
 
Check out this scenario

Me and Hondo are playing 9 ball for $100 a rack, I'm up several racks (like always) but I'm losing my focus and I hate to lose even one rack of 9 ball when there's that much fish soaking.

I can see Hondo is starting to put it together. In many of the earlier racks, Hondo would run 2, sometimes 3 balls when he got to the table but this time he's sunk 5 in a row and he's aiming on the 8. Me being the typ who hates to lose, I simply say aloud, "You know, I think they should put W on the dime replacing FDR."

Hearing this, Hondo would miscue giving me ball in hand on the eight and I would run out collecting another $100 while Hondo goes into convulsions and climbs under the table. LOL!

:p

The Woim

P.S. - Enough of this dead horse.
 
The Woim said:
Playing pool is a grown up game. Russ almost got you into a shouting match just by mentioning Bush.

If a little bit of baiting is enough to throw you off your game, there's nothing anyone can do to keep you from acting like a little immature kid who's always having a temper tantrum.

I must remind myself if I ever get in a money match with Hondo to just pretend to talk on my cell phone about Bush. I'd say "Dave, I heard you got to meet President Bush yesterday." and Hondo would stand up, glare at me, then probably unscrew his cue and run off crying. LOL!

:p

Hondo was the name of a book written by Louis Lamour and was filmed starring John Wayne. Now that I've informed the rest of the AZers of the history of that fine name, why are you acting like a wuss-boy?

Standing by to teach manliness to those males who lack it...

The Woim
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1. Russ is a horse's a** who irritates me no matter what he says.
2. This was said to me by a supposedly good friend. By your
tone you are obviously no friend and I'd just tell you to f**k
off or take a hike.
3. I took my nickname from John " Hondo" Havlicek.
4. If you met me & knew my history I don't think you'd
call me a wuss boy. Talk's cheap on the net, hoss.
 
The Woim said:
Me and Hondo are playing 9 ball for $100 a rack, I'm up several racks (like always) but I'm losing my focus and I hate to lose even one rack of 9 ball when there's that much fish soaking.

I can see Hondo is starting to put it together. In many of the earlier racks, Hondo would run 2, sometimes 3 balls when he got to the table but this time he's sunk 5 in a row and he's aiming on the 8. Me being the typ who hates to lose, I simply say aloud, "You know, I think they should put W on the dime replacing FDR."

Hearing this, Hondo would miscue giving me ball in hand on the eight and I would run out collecting another $100 while Hondo goes into convulsions and climbs under the table. LOL!

:p

The Woim

P.S. - Enough of this dead horse.
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Nah, in real life I'd simply pull down your little panties, spank
your little pink bottom, and send you home crying to momma.
Thanks for the laughs, woim.;)
 
Hondo....do you think you're flaunting the rules that I know you are very well aware of at this point?
 
Mr. Wilson said:
Hondo....do you think you're flaunting the rules that I know you are very well aware of at this point?
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Well, the woim was baiting, but you're right. My apologies.
 
hondo said:
I was playing one pocket with Joe, who I have gone to
DCC with the last 2 years. I was beating him, which I
rarely do anymore.
Another good friend, Eddie, who enjoys messing with me,
is watching the game.
I have a long difficult shot. As I start to hit the ball, Eddie yells
something. I stop and ask Eddie why he's always doing something
like that. A few shots later Eddie yells out what a great job
he thinks Bush is doing. Joe agrees and they start going on
about Bush's greatness being secure.
Both were well aware of how I feel. I start arguing with them
and suddenly I can't make a ball.
I accuse Eddie of doing this deliberately to mess with me.
After all, why bring this topic, a sore point with me, up in
the middle of the game? I call Eddie an a**hole. Joe quits,
says he'll never play with me again.
Both are portraying me as the sorehead and both friendships
appear lost.
Was I wrong? My wife & oldest son feel that they were baiting me.
Click to expand...

Did they owe you any money?
 
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