Is it true nice guys finish last?

rackmsuckr

rackmsuckr

Linda Carter - The QUEEN!
Silver Member
Or am I just too naive/nice for my own good? Here's the situation:

I carry an extra cue with me, a Keith Kustom Kue..I guess it's worth about $1500-$2000. I used to use it for a break stick.

There is a big guy who used to rent an apartment from us who plays pretty decent. He's a massage therapist and always dead broke. So I have let him use my Keith at the last 2 tournaments. It picked up a tink that I haven't figured out where it is located, and I suspect, even though I asked him not to break with it, he hits the balls hard and may have damaged it, because I haven't used it in awhile.

He always said he would throw me a massage in return for the last 2 times I let him use it, but he always gets mad and leaves in a snit when he loses, so I have never collected.

Today, I didn't really want him to use it, but he asked me point blank and I didn't feel I could be ungracious and say no, so I let him use it. And when he was done, he would carry it back to me, so I would have to babysit it too. :(

He is so broke that he made a deal with a guy in his first match to split and neither one of them had to make it into the money.

My first match, I was on the hill against this 'road player' and he had a chance to tie it, but he miscued on the 8, so I won that.

My next match, was against a guy that was really good, he didn't miss much, but I was playing well too, so I stayed even until 4-4 and he pulled ahead to 6-4. He missed the 9 on the next rack and left me a long tough back cut with whitey on the end rail, but I made it and then broke and ran 2 racks to finish the set, 7-6. They were tough runouts, too, so I felt pretty good.

Guess who I play 3rd round on the winner's side? Yep, our ex-renter. Now, is it really fair for you to get beaten by your own equipment? Should I have made him use a bar cue? He breaks like a monster, hits everything hard and slopped in a 9 ball, and 2 other balls during the match to continue runs, so I lost.

I don't think I was thinking much about it during the match, but it sure felt unfair when it was over. I did collect on the massage afterwards, but I still didn't feel good about it. I just lost, one out of the money, to a good player, so he won't get to borrow it tomorrow.

What would you have done? Am I just too soft for my own good when it comes to pool?
 
rackmsuckr said:
Or am I just too naive/nice for my own good? Here's the situation:

I carry an extra cue with me, a Keith Kustom Kue..I guess it's worth about $1500-$2000. I used to use it for a break stick.

There is a big guy who used to rent an apartment from us who plays pretty decent. He's a massage therapist and always dead broke. So I have let him use my Keith at the last 2 tournaments. It picked up a tink that I haven't figured out where it is located, and I suspect, even though I asked him not to break with it, he hits the balls hard and may have damaged it, because I haven't used it in awhile.

He always said he would throw me a massage in return for the last 2 times I let him use it, but he always gets mad and leaves in a snit when he loses, so I have never collected.

Today, I didn't really want him to use it, but he asked me point blank and I didn't feel I could be ungracious and say no, so I let him use it. And when he was done, he would carry it back to me, so I would have to babysit it too. :(

He is so broke that he made a deal with a guy in his first match to split and neither one of them had to make it into the money.

My first match, I was on the hill against this 'road player' and he had a chance to tie it, but he miscued on the 8, so I won that.

My next match, was against a guy that was really good, he didn't miss much, but I was playing well too, so I stayed even until 4-4 and he pulled ahead to 6-4. He missed the 9 on the next rack and left me a long tough back cut with whitey on the end rail, but I made it and then broke and ran 2 racks to finish the set, 7-6. They were tough runouts, too, so I felt pretty good.

Guess who I play 3rd round on the winner's side? Yep, our ex-renter. Now, is it really fair for you to get beaten by your own equipment? Should I have made him use a bar cue? He breaks like a monster, hits everything hard and slopped in a 9 ball, and 2 other balls during the match to continue runs, so I lost.

I don't think I was thinking much about it during the match, but it sure felt unfair when it was over. I did collect on the massage afterwards, but I still didn't feel good about it. I just lost, one out of the money, to a good player, so he won't get to borrow it tomorrow.

What would you have done? Am I just too soft for my own good when it comes to pool?
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Personally, I would have just told him the truth. i would have just told him that there was something wrong with the cue and that you were sending it out to a repairman to find out what was wrong and to have it fixed. i am assuming that this is what you are going to be doing anyway. That way you would not be lying to him and can then go on about everyone's own business. on a side note. i would have also told him that the cue had the "tink" after the last time he had borrowed it........mike
 
my thoughts

I used to loan equipment by the ton. I never felt I was beaten by my own equipment, just a better competitor at a given moment in time. Indeed, that is always my attitude when I lose, I was beaten by someone playing better at the moment. The other player may have more of these moments than I do but I always figure every dog has it's day and mine is coming.

However, to get back to the subject and I think the real problem, you are letting the guy use you. You aren't happy with the way he is using your stick but you have started something and don't know how to stop it. In truth, you do need to stand up for yourself. Give him a little warning like after he hands the stick back to you after a match and tell him it is the last time he can use the stick, you want to save it for other things. If you can't bring yourself to do that, go with plan "B". Forget to bring the stick to the matches even though it has been in your case for years. Do that a time or three and he will get the hint.

Speaking for myself the only thing I hate worse than being a bit of an ass is being walked on. If I err it is on the side of being a bit of an ass to people that would use me. They should be used to such treatment anyway.

Hu


rackmsuckr said:
Or am I just too naive/nice for my own good? Here's the situation:

I carry an extra cue with me, a Keith Kustom Kue..I guess it's worth about $1500-$2000. I used to use it for a break stick.

There is a big guy who used to rent an apartment from us who plays pretty decent. He's a massage therapist and always dead broke. So I have let him use my Keith at the last 2 tournaments. It picked up a tink that I haven't figured out where it is located, and I suspect, even though I asked him not to break with it, he hits the balls hard and may have damaged it, because I haven't used it in awhile.

He always said he would throw me a massage in return for the last 2 times I let him use it, but he always gets mad and leaves in a snit when he loses, so I have never collected.

Today, I didn't really want him to use it, but he asked me point blank and I didn't feel I could be ungracious and say no, so I let him use it. And when he was done, he would carry it back to me, so I would have to babysit it too. :(

He is so broke that he made a deal with a guy in his first match to split and neither one of them had to make it into the money.

My first match, I was on the hill against this 'road player' and he had a chance to tie it, but he miscued on the 8, so I won that.

My next match, was against a guy that was really good, he didn't miss much, but I was playing well too, so I stayed even until 4-4 and he pulled ahead to 6-4. He missed the 9 on the next rack and left me a long tough back cut with whitey on the end rail, but I made it and then broke and ran 2 racks to finish the set, 7-6. They were tough runouts, too, so I felt pretty good.

Guess who I play 3rd round on the winner's side? Yep, our ex-renter. Now, is it really fair for you to get beaten by your own equipment? Should I have made him use a bar cue? He breaks like a monster, hits everything hard and slopped in a 9 ball, and 2 other balls during the match to continue runs, so I lost.

I don't think I was thinking much about it during the match, but it sure felt unfair when it was over. I did collect on the massage afterwards, but I still didn't feel good about it. I just lost, one out of the money, to a good player, so he won't get to borrow it tomorrow.

What would you have done? Am I just too soft for my own good when it comes to pool?
Click to expand...
 
rackmsuckr said:
Or am I just too naive/nice for my own good? Here's the situation:

I carry an extra cue with me, a Keith Kustom Kue..I guess it's worth about $1500-$2000. I used to use it for a break stick.

There is a big guy who used to rent an apartment from us who plays pretty decent. He's a massage therapist and always dead broke. So I have let him use my Keith at the last 2 tournaments. It picked up a tink that I haven't figured out where it is located, and I suspect, even though I asked him not to break with it, he hits the balls hard and may have damaged it, because I haven't used it in awhile.

He always said he would throw me a massage in return for the last 2 times I let him use it, but he always gets mad and leaves in a snit when he loses, so I have never collected.

Today, I didn't really want him to use it, but he asked me point blank and I didn't feel I could be ungracious and say no, so I let him use it. And when he was done, he would carry it back to me, so I would have to babysit it too. :(

He is so broke that he made a deal with a guy in his first match to split and neither one of them had to make it into the money.

My first match, I was on the hill against this 'road player' and he had a chance to tie it, but he miscued on the 8, so I won that.

My next match, was against a guy that was really good, he didn't miss much, but I was playing well too, so I stayed even until 4-4 and he pulled ahead to 6-4. He missed the 9 on the next rack and left me a long tough back cut with whitey on the end rail, but I made it and then broke and ran 2 racks to finish the set, 7-6. They were tough runouts, too, so I felt pretty good.

Guess who I play 3rd round on the winner's side? Yep, our ex-renter. Now, is it really fair for you to get beaten by your own equipment? Should I have made him use a bar cue? He breaks like a monster, hits everything hard and slopped in a 9 ball, and 2 other balls during the match to continue runs, so I lost.

I don't think I was thinking much about it during the match, but it sure felt unfair when it was over. I did collect on the massage afterwards, but I still didn't feel good about it. I just lost, one out of the money, to a good player, so he won't get to borrow it tomorrow.

What would you have done? Am I just too soft for my own good when it comes to pool?
Click to expand...

A favor today is a duty tomorrow.
 
Shootingarts is right. If you don't feel good about the situation---change it. But I have one suggestion. Instead of being reactive by not bringing your cue for him to use be proactive by telling him now that he will have to make other arrangements. Don't give him excuses or reasons. If he balks or asks why, just say "It is my decision". If he persists, then you know he is using you.

Then the hard part---just forget about it and don't let it bother you.
 
Don't lend your stuff out Linda..if anyone asks especially this guy tell them when you lent it out someone damaged it and so you will never again lend anything out ..
 
Sweetie, you are totally over thinking this thing. :)


You loaned an expensive piece of equipment out to someone and it came back damaged. All the other stuff is only as relevant as you want to make it.

The truth is that you made a mistake in not bringing up the damage issue earlier, but so what.

You have to tell him what happened and if he is anything other than completely apologetic, then he's not worth your time on any level. But you have to at least let him know about the damage and give him a chance to somehow make amends on that issue. I'm thinking he's probably going to feel bad about it and at least stop asking to borrow your cues.

Again, all the other stuff is irrelevant. :)


I really look forward to seeing you play one of these days! :D
 
I would definitely mention it is in the shop, damaged last time he used it. Bottom line it is an expensive cue. Myself, I would not lend it out. I'll lend out cues but they aren't worth much. Is he aware of how much the cue is worth? If he is breaking with you expense cue, that should tell you he has no respect for your equipment and needs to play with a cheap cue from ebay.
 
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??????????

If you can't say no get you a little beater to loan. You know a lot about cues an its probably a ferrule or weight bolt. Since you finished ! place out of money that means he finished in money. I would of told him to keep the
massage an throw me a bone-like maybe giving back my entry fee for cue leasing.
Pinocchio
 
Hi Linda,

I'd like to consider mysef a nice guy inside and outside of the pool room, but hard experience has taught me these two things:

1. There are only about two or three people on the planet that I will let use my cue, other than to to hit a ball or two to see how it feels. A good cue stick is simply too hard to replace, as no two cues hit exactly the same.

2. I'm sorry, but there's no way on Earth than someone is going to beat me out of money using my own equipment. That's like lending a tough player a grand and then playing him for $500 a set!

"You gotta be hard!"--Bert (George C. Scott) in "The Hustler"

Peace and Love, Linda (but not on the pool table!),

Your boy in St. Thomas,
VIProfessor
 
You are too nice Linda!
I wouldn't loan out a $500 cue let alone a $1500 cue. I think you'll have to chalk (no pun intended) this one up as a lesson learned. You earned the money to buy nice equipment, you don't need to loan it someone who won't earn his own money to buy nice equipment.
I know I'd be ticked if someone beat me with my own equipment. Therefore I don't loan out my equipment or money!
 
I like to think I'm an ice guy, but for me to lend a very expensive cue to anybody, they'd have to be a very close friend.

As for the general question posed, there is a price you sometimes pay for being a nice guy, but speaking for myself, it's a price well worth paying. Sharing your equipment is just one of many possible ways in which you choose to be a good sport. More power to you.
 
As a rule, I *never* let anyone use my personal playing cues. Mainly because I'm afraid they will damage them (Predator shafts).

The exception to this is a very good player who wants to see how my cue hits, then I will let them shoot a few shots. But I tell them no fast shots.

I will let better players use my breaking cue if theirs is being repaired or whatever. My breaking cue is built like a tank, so I'm not worried about anyone damaging it.

When players want to use my cue and I don't want them to use it, I am "assertive" with them.

Them: "Can I use your cue?"

Me: "No, I never let anyone use my cue!"

Them: "Oh please. I'll be careful with it!"

Me: "No, I never let anyone use my cue!"

Them: "Don't be a jerk, let me use your cue!!"

Me: "No, I never let anyone use my cue!"

(Just repeat the same thing over and over until they "get it"....)
 
A non-confrontational solution would be to buy a smaller case, so there is no room to carry the Keith's Kustom to the pool room. You can't loan out what you don't have, right?

Or, you could have the cue refinished, and not hit with it at all afterwards, in the interest of resale value. ;) If you won't let yourself play with a particular cue, how could anyone blame you for not letting anyone else play with it?

Good Rolls,
Rasta
 
Linda ....

Many have offered good comments, but most simply, you set yourself up to be used, and there are ALL KINDS of users out there, so why are you surprised at the outcome. Look at your description of the guy, does he sound like someone that is responsible and respectful???????
 
I loaned my playing cue (Predator) out for one night only to see it come back with nicks in the shaft and the finish :mad: Never agian! I have one cue that I let just about anyone who wants use it, it's the first cue I ever owned, a good ol'e Minnesota Fats ;)
 
WW,
To take a small tangent; the phrase "nice guys finish last" is DEAD WRONG. The quote is attributed to Leo Durocher; a fierce competitor who overcame lack of size and skill with incredible competitiveness (and equally incredibly bad sportsmanship). Despite his bad manners and worse attitude he did NOT have great success either as a player or a manager.

The phrase is now commonly used as an excuse for bad behavior or bad sportsmanship - people who believe this should be avoided. The sporting world is filled with exemplary gentlemen (and ladies) who have reached the pinnacle of their sport with good behavior and good sportsmanship.

You are to be commended for your generosity. If, however, your "friend" is just an acquaintance rather than a true friend; then you certainly may be a victim of your own largesse. Perhaps Pinocchio's advice is sound (he's SHARP), get a "beater-cue" to lend out to those who won't get their own equipment.
 
Scaramouche said:
If the guy can't take care of his own finances you shouldn't expect him to take care of your property.:D
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That's a good point, you don't have to be rude or even say anything at all to him, just stop bringing the cue and hopefully he'll take the hint;)
 
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