Jay Helfert.....DAD?

Now I know why my computer has been down for the last three days. Out of mercy for me.

Donovan, I was meaning to tell you something at Derby City, but I just couldn't find a way to break it to you. I WAS in Chicago in 1967, hanging out in Bensingers. I played pool with Joey Gold and George Michaels. They can confirm this. I also played a young Tom Spencer and maybe Tom Karabotsos too.

I used to eat in a little coffee shop a few blocks away where there was this cute little waitress. One day I got up the nerve to ask her out. She said yes and I took her to see a movie. She invited me back to her apartment. One thing led to another. A short time later, I left Chicago heading West. Within a few months I landed in Los Angeles. I remember it was Winter time back East and in California it was 70 degrees and sunny. This was really the "nuts".

I lost touch with that waitress, and always wondered what happened to her. Well tell her I said Hi and will be glad to pay child support for you, until you grow up. I knew it was you the moment I saw you. My baby boy. You have grown up to be a fine young man, but we must work on that stroke. And if you can't keep your head down I will disown you.

Other than that, your game is fine. You can visit me in California anytime. We can play some social pool for old times sake. Since we are family, I will not gamble with you for more than $20 a game, so don't ask.

Now as for Linda and her little boy, I NEVER HAD RELATIONS WITH THAT WOMAN! Yet.
 
Quote Jay Helfert:

I lost touch with that waitress, and always wondered what happened to her. Well tell her I said Hi and will be glad to pay child support for you, until you grow up.


Folks, this is the funniest line in the entire, funny as hell, thread. Thanks, Jay.
 
Father,

Well, I am sure my mom will be happy to know you are doing well. I just hope she doesn't ask for your phone number. I am sure there was a time when it would have comforted her to know that you were willing to pay child support. Although one must question the convenience of timing during this glorious celebration of lost family members, reuniting. I finally get in touch with you and I am already grown up. Damn, where are the child laws, protecting us thirty-something adolescences? ;)

*Note to Williebetmore, in case you didn't notice, you lost your 20 duck loan bro. Tough break! :p

Anyway Jay, :eek:, I mean Pop, thanks for the great response. I was in a dark, and lonely place thinking you would never claim me as your own. However, now the sun rises with brighter rays (even though it is, umm, snowing in Texas today :rolleyes: ) just knowing you are there for me. By the way, how in the hell did you know I have been jumping up in my shots lately? :confused: I only filmed myself yesterday and found this to be the case, even though it was ever so slight. Oh Yeaaah, I forgot....GENETICS! :D Glad to know I am on the right path!

For those of you out there that don't believe fairy tales come true, well, they don't. HOWEVER, the legends and stories of pool players, like Jay Helfert, will live on in our memories forever! Thanks JAY, YOU DA MAN........DAD!!!!:cool:

Love your son,
Donovan
 
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Man if ever there was a thread about the importance of PROTECTION this is it !!!!:eek:
 
Well now I can say my day wasn't wasted. I think this is the funniest thing I ever read here. Wish I coulda met both of you guys at the DCC. If I ever do meet either of you the first 9 or 8 beers are on me.

Bob
 
cuejoey said:
Man if ever there was a thread about the importance of PROTECTION this is it !!!!:eek:

I don't think they had many discussions about that kind of stuff at this time. You know there were many distractions like that free loving movement.;)
 
jay helfert said:
Now I know why my computer has been down for the last three days. Out of mercy for me.

Donovan, I was meaning to tell you something at Derby City, but I just couldn't find a way to break it to you. I WAS in Chicago in 1967, hanging out in Bensingers. I played pool with Joey Gold and George Michaels. They can confirm this. I also played a young Tom Spencer and maybe Tom Karabotsos too.

I used to eat in a little coffee shop a few blocks away where there was this cute little waitress. One day I got up the nerve to ask her out. She said yes and I took her to see a movie. She invited me back to her apartment. One thing led to another. A short time later, I left Chicago heading West. Within a few months I landed in Los Angeles. I remember it was Winter time back East and in California it was 70 degrees and sunny. This was really the "nuts".

I lost touch with that waitress, and always wondered what happened to her. Well tell her I said Hi and will be glad to pay child support for you, until you grow up. I knew it was you the moment I saw you. My baby boy. You have grown up to be a fine young man, but we must work on that stroke. And if you can't keep your head down I will disown you.

Other than that, your game is fine. You can visit me in California anytime. We can play some social pool for old times sake. Since we are family, I will not gamble with you for more than $20 a game, so don't ask.

Now as for Linda and her little boy, I NEVER HAD RELATIONS WITH THAT WOMAN! Yet.

Poolplayers;) ;) ;) . Jay, its beautiful - think I will be smiling for quite some time. Some of the yarns and maybe yarns are as good as life.
Jack
www.johnmaddencues.com
 
Timberly said:
That photo resembles Drivermaker way more than it does Hal! :D

Am I lying?!?!? :eek:
 

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Timberly said:
Am I lying?!?!? :eek:

OMG...luv the tutu...looks like he was able to outrun the nutz:confused: R U sure its not the FAST ONE before his debilitating injuries???

A little breast augmentation would make "it" perfect----I'm sooooo confused:confused:
 
ribdoner said:
OMG...luv the tutu...looks like he was able to outrun the nutz:confused: R U sure its not the FAST ONE before his debilitating injuries???

A little breast augmentation would make "it" perfect----I'm sooooo confused:confused:

Oh man, I'm with Chilli66! Please don't show us that pic anymore. AND dang ribdoner, you sure know how to a bad thing worse. UGG!! :D
 
Nice wax job for the superman costume.(wonderwoman)
Congrats to Donavan and his new found daddy, it's nice that the pool world has a couple with a happy ending. Maybe they could look for a long lost sister. LOL
thanks for the laughs guys this was very entertaining by all,
mrs.g
 
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