Pool stories you are sick of hearing.

I can think of one particular story that some old drunk in any bar tells about a good player he knows. Can any one guess?

You wouldnt of beat me 30 years ago,,,,,funny thing is he,s right i havnt pick up a pool cue yet...

(Sorry my bad i thought we was talking about the drunk.)
 
I can think of one particular story that some old drunk in any bar tells about a good player he knows. Can any one guess?


I hate any variation on the "I Don't Gamble Anymore, but I Put Myself Through College Hustling Pool" story.

Lou Figueroa
second only to the:
"I Haven't Picked Up a Cue
in the Last Six Months"
story
 
A couple of weeks ago, a drunk comes up and said, "you're a pretty good pool player".
I said, "thanks, but I'm not that good.
Well, he says, I could beat you with a broom handle.
I'm thinkin, I could beat you with a pool cue, but not on the pool table.
 
I've known a few to say that... usually, it's "I used to play a lot... put myself through college playing pool... but I haven't played in (insert long period here) years and don't play anymore because I got burned out"

You know, the "I haven't played in a long time because I got burned out isn't always just a line." I know I don't play as well as I did when I was in my 20's. I was ranked number one in the prefecture here 3 years straight. Being ranked #1 the association here was supposed to sponsor me for the All-Japan tournament. We had a new guy in charge that year and he said they wouldn't sponsor me because I'm not Japanese. I got so frickin' hot that I literally stopped playing pool. I felt that I didn't want or need to be around that kind of crap, so I stopped playing. I didn't even want to see a pool room. I was literally away from the tables for close to 7 years before I decided that I wanted to play again. That was 3 years ago. Since I came back, I don't have the drive or determination to put the practice time in to get my game back up to where it was. I have absolutely no desire to join a tournament either. I've been invited to a few but I decline. I want nothing to do with the association ever again. Nope, I'm perfectly happy shooting with my friends. I win some, I lose some. No big deal to me anymore. But, there are times when I'm having a really bad night that it's hard not to think "Man, I use to shoot better than this."

So, it's not always just a line.
MULLY
 
that's my favorite line

You wouldnt of beat me 30 years ago,,,,,funny thing is he,s right i havnt pick up a pool cue yet...

(Sorry my bad i thought we was talking about the drunk.)

When the young pups want to play I tell them they couldn't have touched me in my prime. Then after a long pause, "There wasn't a two year old in the world that could beat me!"

Hu
 
Here is my favorite line..I always tell everyone who tells me " I played my way through college".

Wow, you must have been really good! Where did you attend? I never was that good but I paid for a lot of beer playing 3 ball. Would you like to play for a drink?
 
The "I put myself through college playing pool" one is always a favorite of mine...

Now I just tell them, "I put myself through college playing guys like you"
 
Hey! C'mon now, be easy on me, but I DID put myself through college by shooting pool. Well, my parents paid for the tuition and the books and a crappy Mazda pickup truck and gave me money for an apartment .... BUT, I used to go to the bars and play for money to support all my weekend entertainment!

Of course, I was going to UTEP in El Paso and I would play until I was up $20 bucks on a Friday night, then I would take the $20 to the bars in Juarez Mexico and drink using that $20 all weekend!

Now that my college days are a very distant memory, I like to say "I played my way through college". :)
 
Just like you Paulie, I played for my drinks to get me through college on crappy bar tables on some nights.
On other nights I payed for my drinks and others to get me through college.
 
Of course, I was going to UTEP in El Paso and I would play until I was up $20 bucks on a Friday night, then I would take the $20 to the bars in Juarez Mexico and drink using that $20 all weekend!

You quit while you were ahead??? Not nice, not nice at all. Especially in El Paso. You're lucky you didn't get into a few scrapes doing that.

Maniac
 
I have yet to hear the "put myself through college" line but I'm definitely not buying it. If you can earn 20k a year or something playing pool, why are you even in college? You can make a living playing the best game there is :P

I'm definitely sick of "yeah I don't play as good as I used to".... did your age cause you to forget the smart shot to take, or how to draw a ball? I figure someone had to shoot pretty sporty 30 years ago to overcome their obvious lack of knowledge.

"I know someone who knows/played with/beat jeanette lee" ...basically a lot of people are convinced she's top 3 on the planet.

"I know someone who used to clean minnesota fats' table/hold his cue/play him for money/fix his sandwiches" ...basically a lot of people are convinced he was the #1 of all time.
 
> I have to amend my previous post to add a little story about one of the guys I run into at the bars I have to play at.

This guy claims to have once upon a time (probably a 3 day weekend :cool:) to have played for a living,but is now a fairly squishy APA 4 :confused:. No offense to anyone that plays that speed,but even playing 5 dollars a game I could make a living off HIM if he'd play me 40 hours a week :eek:,a mismatch any way you slice it.

He's also about the nittiest person I've ever met when it comes to wanting to half-ass start arguments over insignifigant details about YOUR shot.

Here is the situation tonight. I call a cross-corner bank along the side rail where the cue ball floats down and makes one of his balls,to clear it from the pocket,along with making the bank I called,leaving me a short cross-corner with the perfect angle to trickle the 8 loose and get out. I'm about 90% sure he heard what I called,but he turned around for something. He turns back around in time to see his ball go in,and the final result.

THEN he starts asking me if I'm gonna take "that slop shit",saying that because HIS ball went in FIRST,that the called and pocketed shot I made is basically a foul :confused:. His explanation was "in Vegas you gotta call everything. I saw a guy lose 50 grand cause a ball brushed the rail on the way in. You gotta call EVERYTHING there. :eek:"

After he saw my facial expression when I had to try not to laugh in his face,I simply told him "ok man,if you're claiming that was a foul,take ball in hand,I'll bet 20 you don't get out :cool:".

The reason I posted this story is because after all that crap,he tried to tell me if I really thought I was hot shit that once again in Vegas,there are guys that play for 10,000 A BALL :shakehead: . Where the hell is John Schmidt when you need him :rotflmao1:.

Now who in the hell would be that stupid,unless the table was so gaffy that making balls period was rare? Or maybe he's wrong about where he saw this and the game he saw was a pay ball ring game on Bertha at Hard Times?

I know the guy was flat-out lying about this shit,but at least make it believable,you feel me? Tommy D.
 
I beat Jeanette Lee!

I have yet to hear the "put myself through college" line but I'm definitely not buying it. If you can earn 20k a year or something playing pool, why are you even in college? You can make a living playing the best game there is :P

I'm definitely sick of "yeah I don't play as good as I used to".... did your age cause you to forget the smart shot to take, or how to draw a ball? I figure someone had to shoot pretty sporty 30 years ago to overcome their obvious lack of knowledge.

"I know someone who knows/played with/beat jeanette lee" ...basically a lot of people are convinced she's top 3 on the planet.

"I know someone who used to clean minnesota fats' table/hold his cue/play him for money/fix his sandwiches" ...basically a lot of people are convinced he was the #1 of all time.

My brother and I stopped at a Dairy Queen just outside Kilgore Texas when we were passing through and bumped into Jeanette Lee. We were in a little bit of a hurry on the way home but I had to hang around long enough to beat her before leaving. First time I even knew there was a Jeanette Lee pinball machine. That would be a cool addition to any home game room.
 
I just thought of one that makes me cringe every time I hear it.
It's the old Rod Stewart song 'Maggie May', where he croons..."or steal my Daddy's cue and make a livin' outta playin' pool."
As if such things could be done overnight, just on a whim. :rolleyes:
 
"Im not as good as I used to be"
"I was the best player around when I was your age"
"I could be go pro but....."

I hope when I get older I never say any of these. I only intend on getting better.
 
Jeanette Lee pinball machine

We had that in a local room. The goofy comments from 'sharkey' or whoever... "you're a straight shooter!"

My favorite part was the artwork, they gave jeanette these lil stubby munchkin arms because the artist didn't know how to foreshorten them I guess. Or due to space constraints.
 
I just thought of one that makes me cringe every time I hear it.
It's the old Rod Stewart song 'Maggie May', where he croons..."or steal my Daddy's cue and make a livin' outta playin' pool."
As if such things could be done overnight, just on a whim. :rolleyes:

Actually my dear fellow, I'm quite the Rod Stewart fan. And... Rod missed his father quite a bit when he was young due to the fact his pa spent many nights gambling and playing pool. Rod himself picked up a cue and played from an early age. He mentions putting a rack or two together in many interviews. He also played professional soccer.

He mentioned in a radio interview that he resents the game because of the time it took away from his father.

Another tidbit of information from the Crawfish Book of Fun Facts.
 
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