Save Money Replacing Damaged Balls

[NewStroke]

Me and my friend Josh are developing a system to save your worn out/chipped billiard balls.

1. Place the damaged ball in our rotary drump sander and remove the top 1/8 of the ball.
2. Wash the damaged ball in our specially formulated water.
3. Wrap the ball in our super dense ceramic mesh, don't worry about wrinkles, these will be removed when you iron the ball in the last step.
4. Dip the ball in our simulated aramith dip and let set for 3 mins. When dry this compound is also bullet proof up to .50 caliber at 4 feet.
5. Pull from the dip and iron the ball with a regular clothes iron.
6. Repaint the ball with your favorite color from Sherwin Williams.

Cost for the system: $199.99.
Cost for not replacing balls: Priceless.

 

[mosconiac]

That's nothing...if you're married you are in luck (for once!). For the last few years I've been frustrated by finding my wife's long brunette hair everywhere around the house...on my clothes, on the couch, in the sink, on the table...EVERYWHERE!

One day as I was watching that pile of brunette hair gathering in the shower drain, I had a flash of brilliance. I gathered them up and tied them end to end until I had a good 30 feet of "string". My cue needed a new wrap so I grabbed some super glue and VOILA...a brand-spankin new, brown wrap. The red highlights set off my veneers every so well. It's a conversation starter and it didn't cost me anything.

 

[MitchAlsup]

this compound is also bullet proof up to .50 caliber at 4 feet.

It takes something like forged Depleted Uranium 3 inches thick to take a 50 caliber penetrator at 4 ft (750 gr at 2900 fps). I don't think any kind of plastic--including carbon fiber--will take this kind of punishment.

 

[bfdlad]

Me and my friend Josh are developing a system to save your worn out/chipped billiard balls.

1. Place the damaged ball in our rotary drump sander and remove the top 1/8 of the ball.
2. Wash the damaged ball in our specially formulated water.
3. Wrap the ball in our super dense ceramic mesh, don't worry about wrinkles, these will be removed when you iron the ball in the last step.
4. Dip the ball in our simulated aramith dip and let set for 3 mins. When dry this compound is also bullet proof up to .50 caliber at 4 feet.
5. Pull from the dip and iron the ball with a regular clothes iron.
6. Repaint the ball with your favorite color from Sherwin Williams.

Cost for the system: $199.99.
Cost for not replacing balls: Priceless.

You 2 knuckleheads couldn't organize a orgy in a whore house. The last thing I am gonna do is listen to your ball repair system. Actually you might need it now since I'm just busting your balls.
See you in about 3 weeks I think. Hey do you still havethe girlfriend you had before?

 

[cadaniel]

It takes something like forged Depleted Uranium 3 inches thick to take a 50 caliber penetrator at 4 ft (750 gr at 2900 fps). I don't think any kind of plastic--including carbon fiber--will take this kind of punishment.

Actually, my company creates armor for military helicopters than have this capability. It's built by guys I wouldn't trust with a potato gun much less depleted uranium.

 

[poolsnark]

That's nothing...if you're married you are in luck (for once!). For the last few years I've been frustrated by finding my wife's long brunette hair everywhere around the house...on my clothes, on the couch, in the sink, on the table...EVERYWHERE!

One day as I was watching that pile of brunette hair gathering in the shower drain, I had a flash of brilliance. I gathered them up and tied them end to end until I had a good 30 feet of "string". My cue needed a new wrap so I grabbed some super glue and VOILA...a brand-spankin new, brown wrap. The red highlights set off my veneers every so well. It's a conversation starter and it didn't cost me anything.

Dude. Seriously, eww.

 

[Black-Balled]

hmmmm...I do need someone to work on my balls...

 

[manwon]

Me and my friend Josh are developing a system to save your worn out/chipped billiard balls.

1. Place the damaged ball in our rotary drump sander and remove the top 1/8 of the ball.
2. Wash the damaged ball in our specially formulated water.
3. Wrap the ball in our super dense ceramic mesh, don't worry about wrinkles, these will be removed when you iron the ball in the last step.
4. Dip the ball in our simulated aramith dip and let set for 3 mins. When dry this compound is also bullet proof up to .50 caliber at 4 feet.
5. Pull from the dip and iron the ball with a regular clothes iron.
6. Repaint the ball with your favorite color from Sherwin Williams.

Cost for the system: $199.99.
Cost for not replacing balls: Priceless.

Dude you are infringing on my Patten (US #88745609), and you better stop before I get mad!!!!!!!!!!!!! Burp!!!!!!!!!!:embarrassed2: Whoops!!!!!!!

Oh and by the way quit playing with my balls!!!!!!

 

[Thecoats]

That's nothing...if you're married you are in luck (for once!). For the last few years I've been frustrated by finding my wife's long brunette hair everywhere around the house...on my clothes, on the couch, in the sink, on the table...EVERYWHERE!

One day as I was watching that pile of brunette hair gathering in the shower drain, I had a flash of brilliance. I gathered them up and tied them end to end until I had a good 30 feet of "string". My cue needed a new wrap so I grabbed some super glue and VOILA...a brand-spankin new, brown wrap. The red highlights set off my veneers every so well. It's a conversation starter and it didn't cost me anything.

What is she doing on that table when you are not home

Just Kidding, I will be at the pool room and find one of my three dogs hairs on the cloth every now and then.

-don