Funny pic/gif thread...
- Thread starter dfweyer
- Start date
for you golfers
New golf terms to use when you're
out on the course...
A 'Rock Hudson'- a putt that looked straight, but wasn't.
A 'Saddam Hussein'- from one bunker into another.
A 'Yasser Arafat'- butt ugly and in the sand.
A 'John Kennedy Jr.'- didn't quite make it over the water.
A 'Rodney King'- over-clubbed.
An 'O.J.'- got away with one.
A 'Princess Grace'- should have used a driver.
A 'Princess Di'- shouldn't have used the driver.
A 'Condom'- safe, but didn't feel very good.
A 'Brazilian'- shaved the hole.
A 'Rush Limbaugh'- a little to the right.
A 'Nancy Pelosi'- Way to the left and out of bounds.
A 'James Joyce'- a putt that's impossible to read.
A 'Ted Kennedy'- goes in the water and jumps out.
A 'Pee Wee Herman'- too much wrist.
A 'Sonny Bono'- straight into the trees.
A 'Paris Hilton'- a very expensive hole.
A `TIGER WOODS'-Wrong Hole.
New golf terms to use when you're
out on the course...
A 'Rock Hudson'- a putt that looked straight, but wasn't.
A 'Saddam Hussein'- from one bunker into another.
A 'Yasser Arafat'- butt ugly and in the sand.
A 'John Kennedy Jr.'- didn't quite make it over the water.
A 'Rodney King'- over-clubbed.
An 'O.J.'- got away with one.
A 'Princess Grace'- should have used a driver.
A 'Princess Di'- shouldn't have used the driver.
A 'Condom'- safe, but didn't feel very good.
A 'Brazilian'- shaved the hole.
A 'Rush Limbaugh'- a little to the right.
A 'Nancy Pelosi'- Way to the left and out of bounds.
A 'James Joyce'- a putt that's impossible to read.
A 'Ted Kennedy'- goes in the water and jumps out.
A 'Pee Wee Herman'- too much wrist.
A 'Sonny Bono'- straight into the trees.
A 'Paris Hilton'- a very expensive hole.
A `TIGER WOODS'-Wrong Hole.
So many things wrong here...
This is priceless. :smile:
Im pretty sure Im retarded now. My reality has been comprimised.
How right you are Trooper!! I'm an "OVER" guy all the way. And your opinion is supported by scientific research:
Over or Under TP Poll
Though the voting was close in my state (54% to 46% California being a bunch of radical "under" liberals) overall across the nation it was 72% in favor of the over. Florida was a massive 85% in favor of the "over". Click on the map to find your local results.
Last edited:
...............
Finally some mathematical proof:
Your pets thinking
Think this captures their “spirit” :
Excerpts from a Dog's Diary..
8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 PM - Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 PM - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 PM - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 PM - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 PM - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 PM - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 PM - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
Excerpts from a Cat's Diary.
Day 983 of my captivity.
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.
The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.
Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am. Bastards.
There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies. I must learn what this means and how to use it to my advantage..
Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow, but at the top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.
The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe.
For now.........
Think this captures their “spirit” :
Excerpts from a Dog's Diary..
8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 PM - Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 PM - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 PM - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 PM - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 PM - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 PM - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 PM - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
Excerpts from a Cat's Diary.
Day 983 of my captivity.
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.
The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.
Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am. Bastards.
There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies. I must learn what this means and how to use it to my advantage..
Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow, but at the top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.
The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe.
For now.........
The judge says to a double-homicide defendant, "You're charged with beating
your wife to death with a hammer." A voice at the back of the courtroom yells out,"You bastard!"
The judge says, "You're also charged with beating your mother-in-law
to death with a hammer." The voice in the back of the courtroom yells out, "you bastard!"
The judge stops and says to the guy in the back of the courtroom, "Sir, I can understand
your anger and frustration at this crime. But no more outbursts from you or I'll charge you
with contempt. Is that understood?"
The guy in the back of the courtroom stands up and says, "I'm sorry, Your Honor,
but for fifteen years, I've lived next door to that bastard and every time I asked to borrow
a hammer, he said he didn't have one."
your wife to death with a hammer." A voice at the back of the courtroom yells out,"You bastard!"
The judge says, "You're also charged with beating your mother-in-law
to death with a hammer." The voice in the back of the courtroom yells out, "you bastard!"
The judge stops and says to the guy in the back of the courtroom, "Sir, I can understand
your anger and frustration at this crime. But no more outbursts from you or I'll charge you
with contempt. Is that understood?"
The guy in the back of the courtroom stands up and says, "I'm sorry, Your Honor,
but for fifteen years, I've lived next door to that bastard and every time I asked to borrow
a hammer, he said he didn't have one."
http://youtu.be/KPZzFXxofbg this was soooo lame
