Married Members-This thread is for you

I have been married 7 years, together for 11 and my wife does not play pool at all. Doesn't know the rules of anything except maybe "solids and stripes" and has no appreciation of the game. The last time she came to watch me play, she thought it was important for her to root for me, including walking up in the middle of a match, even walking up while I down on the nineball to tell me "Great shooting!" When I told her she was sharking me and that I needed to talk with her after the match about pool etiquette, she got offended and left. That was 6 years ago.

The one thing that my wife does know about pool is that the game is incredibly important to me and that there is no way I am ever going to stop valuing the game as much as I do unless I am in a coma or something similar. Because of this, she is very supportive of various burdens the game places on our relationship. Things like me being in a pool hall all day and all night for an occasional weekend tournament. Like having the largest room in our last 3 houses occupied by a pool table. Like not saying shit to about the pool table when it goes months on end without play and it still takes up the largest room in our house. Like me buying thousands of dollars in cue sticks. Like me having a closet full of accustats and other pool memorabilia. Like me remodelling the pool room before any other room of our latest house when we moved in. I could go on and on.

I recognize that if the situations were reversed I am not so sure I would be so understanding. This makes me love my wife even more despite the fact she wouldnt be able to tell the difference between force follow three rails with inside english from nine feet away and and smashing at the 9ball as hard as you can with your eyes closed.
 
Thanks For Asking

I used to play pool at the Triple Play on Vets in Metairie/New Orleans and Barbara worked at a phone company next door. The Triple Play was (and still is) a 24 hour spot with lots of action.

She'd come in in the morning for coffee before work and I'd be gambling on the 4'x8'. She'd come in at lunch and I'd still be playing. She'd come in after work for a couple of drinks and I'd still be playing and she'd sit and sweat my games for a few hours.

Eventually, she would go home and return the next morning for coffee and I'd STILL be playing (usually the same opponent(s) and wearing the same clothes). This would go on for DAYS, week after week this would happen over and over again.

One Sunday, she bet me $100 on an NFL game and she won. She agreed to play some $20 8-ball against me and I won three games in a row and she pulled up. Then she took me out to dinner and spent the other $40.

When I wasn't playing pool, I was playing poker and she accompanied me to all my games. She worked and I gambled for a living. I had two nice cars, a motorcycle and owed NO bills or any other gamblers. We fell in love and got married and had our reception at the Triple Play, where we'd met. She is 11 years younger than me.

We moved to Tampa 20 years ago and we've been married equally as long. She still works and provides the health care and I still gamble. As a matter of fact, she encourages my gambling (at pool,poker, horses, dogs, jai-alai, whatever) and wouldn't have it any other way.

I can leave on a Saturday to go to Planet 9-Ball (5 minutes away) and call her the next day from GEORGIA to say that I won't be home for a week or a month. She'll tell me stay as long as I'm having fun and ship me clothes and my medicine (and more money if I need it)....

We make each other laugh daily and tell each other that we love them daily. Life is great. If anyone thinks that I'm making this up or exaggerating, then they don't know Barb and I well enough to give an opinion.

When I was diagnosed with diabetes and had open heart surgery and stopped going to the poolroom as often (and playing pool), Barb bought me a laptop and insisted that I play poker online for money. Now that the poker rooms are open everyday, she encourages me to 'go out' to the rooms to play... she never gets upset with any decision that I make or anything that I buy (pool tapes, cues, poker books, fishing tackle, a boat, etc.)

I had to marry all the natural hair colors before I found this redhead, so there's hope for the rest of you too (Jay H. :) )

Doug
( I'm so happy, that I may NEVER die..... imo ) :)
 
My wife and I have been married for 23 years. I started to play pool after I decided to retire from coaching three sports. Since I had the summers off at that time, I would spend 3-4 nights a week in the pool room, often till 4-5 in the morning. She hated it, and called me often to B**CH at me. She could not stand pool, and let me know it every time I went out to play.

I got a table in my basement and it cut the number days I was in the pool room. I got started in APA leagues around 1997, and it took me a few years to get her involved. I felt that if I could do this, I might be able to change her attitude, towards the game. She has been playing on my team since about 2000, and I swear that she loves the game more than I do.

She does understand now how important it is for me to play and compete, and is totally supportive today.
 
Smorgass Bored said:
I used to play pool at the Triple Play on Vets in Metairie/New Orleans and Barbara worked at a phone company next door. The Triple Play was (and still is) a 24 hour spot with lots of action.

She'd come in in the morning for coffee before work and I'd be gambling on the 4'x8'. She'd come in at lunch and I'd still be playing. She'd come in after work for a couple of drinks and I'd still be playing and she'd sit and sweat my games for a few hours.

Eventually, she would go home and return the next morning for coffee and I'd STILL be playing (usually the same opponent(s) and wearing the same clothes). This would go on for DAYS, week after week this would happen over and over again.

One Sunday, she bet me $100 on an NFL game and she won. She agreed to play some $20 8-ball against me and I won three games in a row and she pulled up. Then she took me out to dinner and spent the other $40.

When I wasn't playing pool, I was playing poker and she accompanied me to all my games. She worked and I gambled for a living. I had two nice cars, a motorcycle and owed NO bills or any other gamblers. We fell in love and got married and had our reception at the Triple Play, where we'd met. She is 11 years younger than me.

We moved to Tampa 20 years ago and we've been married equally as long. She still works and provides the health care and I still gamble. As a matter of fact, she encourages my gambling (at pool,poker, horses, dogs, jai-alai, whatever) and wouldn't have it any other way.

I can leave on a Saturday to go to Planet 9-Ball (5 minutes away) and call her the next day from GEORGIA to say that I won't be home for a week or a month. She'll tell me stay as long as I'm having fun and ship me clothes and my medicine (and more money if I need it)....

We make each other laugh daily and tell each other that we love them daily. Life is great. If anyone thinks that I'm making this up or exaggerating, then they don't know Barb and I well enough to give an opinion.

When I was diagnosed with diabetes and had open heart surgery and stopped going to the poolroom as often (and playing pool), Barb bought me a laptop and insisted that I play poker online for money. Now that the poker rooms are open everyday, she encourages me to 'go out' to the rooms to play... she never gets upset with any decision that I make or anything that I buy (pool tapes, cues, poker books, fishing tackle, a boat, etc.)

I had to marry all the natural hair colors before I found this redhead, so there's hope for the rest of you too (Jay H. :) )

Doug
( I'm so happy, that I may NEVER die..... imo ) :)
Click to expand...
Thats so Cinderella perfect. I love hearing all you guys' stories. Wish I had some to share.
 
Smorgass Bored said:
I used to play pool at the Triple Play on Vets in Metairie/New Orleans and Barbara worked at a phone company next door. The Triple Play was (and still is) a 24 hour spot with lots of action.

She'd come in in the morning for coffee before work and I'd be gambling on the 4'x8'. She'd come in at lunch and I'd still be playing. She'd come in after work for a couple of drinks and I'd still be playing and she'd sit and sweat my games for a few hours.

Eventually, she would go home and return the next morning for coffee and I'd STILL be playing (usually the same opponent(s) and wearing the same clothes). This would go on for DAYS, week after week this would happen over and over again.

One Sunday, she bet me $100 on an NFL game and she won. She agreed to play some $20 8-ball against me and I won three games in a row and she pulled up. Then she took me out to dinner and spent the other $40.

When I wasn't playing pool, I was playing poker and she accompanied me to all my games. She worked and I gambled for a living. I had two nice cars, a motorcycle and owed NO bills or any other gamblers. We fell in love and got married and had our reception at the Triple Play, where we'd met. She is 11 years younger than me.

We moved to Tampa 20 years ago and we've been married equally as long. She still works and provides the health care and I still gamble. As a matter of fact, she encourages my gambling (at pool,poker, horses, dogs, jai-alai, whatever) and wouldn't have it any other way.

I can leave on a Saturday to go to Planet 9-Ball (5 minutes away) and call her the next day from GEORGIA to say that I won't be home for a week or a month. She'll tell me stay as long as I'm having fun and ship me clothes and my medicine (and more money if I need it)....

We make each other laugh daily and tell each other that we love them daily. Life is great. If anyone thinks that I'm making this up or exaggerating, then they don't know Barb and I well enough to give an opinion.

When I was diagnosed with diabetes and had open heart surgery and stopped going to the poolroom as often (and playing pool), Barb bought me a laptop and insisted that I play poker online for money. Now that the poker rooms are open everyday, she encourages me to 'go out' to the rooms to play... she never gets upset with any decision that I make or anything that I buy (pool tapes, cues, poker books, fishing tackle, a boat, etc.)

I had to marry all the natural hair colors before I found this redhead, so there's hope for the rest of you too (Jay H. :) )

Doug
( I'm so happy, that I may NEVER die..... imo ) :)
Click to expand...

This is awesome Smorg. Especially this part "tell each other that we love them daily." I am no master of relationships, but for my relationship this is one of the keys. The times I found my wife showing resentment for pool were only the times I wasn't properly communicating to her that I valued her above pool and that pool was not taking the love I had for her away.
 
jay helfert said:
Oh crap, she ain't gonna like me when we meet. Matt, introduce me as Jay Andrews please. :)
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LOL....no worries. We'll all do dinner next time you're in DC.
 
Marriage and Pool

My wife and I married in 1969 and have never looked back. We seem perfect for one another. In fact, we had our last argument in 1976. We then decided that selfishness was the cause of all our arguments. Y'know, you get into the "She's getting more out of this relationship than I am" sort of crap. So we made a pact that from then on she would only be concerned with my happiness and not her own and that I would only be concerned with her happiness and not my own and this 'mutual nurturing' has worked ever since.

As for pool, no problem. We both have hobbies that the other one does not care for. Mine is pool and she is a Master Gardener. So we both get some 'away' time. We also have many common interests as we grow veggies on our farm that we enjoy donating to food banks and we are both involved in local government. So we have a good mix of time together and apart. I would not want to be single again for anything in the world. I really enjoy having a life partner whom I adore.
 
When I was dating my wife, I took her to a professional tournament (Camel Tour). I don't think she had ever realised there was professional pool. I explained what was going on as we were there, and once when I returned from getting some drinks, she actually told me, shot by shot, what happened while I was gone. (Archer broke, made one, but was hooked and had to push out...Reyas kicked at the one and got a good hit, but Archer got back to the table and ran out!) I knew right then she was the one for me.
When we got married she had a custom wedding ring made for me with a 9-ball rack and a diamond sitting where the 9 goes.
Since then, she has joined my league team, traveled to countless tournaments, and learned how to be a very good tournament director. Since I spend many weekends teaching, she is very understanding of my time in the pool room, and even helps me with bookkeeping, and scheduling students and classes.
Pool is just one thing that we both enjoy and can share.
I guess I'm a pretty lucky guy.
Steve
 
Smorgass Bored said:
I used to play pool at the Triple Play on Vets in Metairie/New Orleans and Barbara worked at a phone company next door. The Triple Play was (and still is) a 24 hour spot with lots of action.

She'd come in in the morning for coffee before work and I'd be gambling on the 4'x8'. She'd come in at lunch and I'd still be playing. She'd come in after work for a couple of drinks and I'd still be playing and she'd sit and sweat my games for a few hours.

Eventually, she would go home and return the next morning for coffee and I'd STILL be playing (usually the same opponent(s) and wearing the same clothes). This would go on for DAYS, week after week this would happen over and over again.

One Sunday, she bet me $100 on an NFL game and she won. She agreed to play some $20 8-ball against me and I won three games in a row and she pulled up. Then she took me out to dinner and spent the other $40.

When I wasn't playing pool, I was playing poker and she accompanied me to all my games. She worked and I gambled for a living. I had two nice cars, a motorcycle and owed NO bills or any other gamblers. We fell in love and got married and had our reception at the Triple Play, where we'd met. She is 11 years younger than me.

We moved to Tampa 20 years ago and we've been married equally as long. She still works and provides the health care and I still gamble. As a matter of fact, she encourages my gambling (at pool,poker, horses, dogs, jai-alai, whatever) and wouldn't have it any other way.

I can leave on a Saturday to go to Planet 9-Ball (5 minutes away) and call her the next day from GEORGIA to say that I won't be home for a week or a month. She'll tell me stay as long as I'm having fun and ship me clothes and my medicine (and more money if I need it)....

We make each other laugh daily and tell each other that we love them daily. Life is great. If anyone thinks that I'm making this up or exaggerating, then they don't know Barb and I well enough to give an opinion.

When I was diagnosed with diabetes and had open heart surgery and stopped going to the poolroom as often (and playing pool), Barb bought me a laptop and insisted that I play poker online for money. Now that the poker rooms are open everyday, she encourages me to 'go out' to the rooms to play... she never gets upset with any decision that I make or anything that I buy (pool tapes, cues, poker books, fishing tackle, a boat, etc.)

I had to marry all the natural hair colors before I found this redhead, so there's hope for the rest of you too (Jay H. :) )

Doug
( I'm so happy, that I may NEVER die..... imo ) :)
Click to expand...

Does she have a sister?
 
I met my wife on a blind date at a bar that had pool tables in it in1965. The one that set me up on the date was my old girlfriend. We have been together since that first night that we met. Almost two years playing house and 40 years married.

We are completely different. She has always worked as a professional in healthcare or insurance. I was blue collar until I became a nurse at 45 years old. She grew up well to do and I grew up poor. She follows the law and the rules. I did not. She doesn?t gamble, drink, or do drugs. I did them all.

She knew what I was before she married me, but to this day I don?t know why she said yes. She could have done much better. We both have our own back account. She pays half the bills and I pay the other half. She knows I gamble and doesn't seem to care as long as I pay my share of the bills and was around to help raise our four kids.

She hates bars and poolrooms but loves the horse track and dog track (clubhouse only). All in all it?s been a happy marriage (probably more for me, 70/30 my favor.) The only thing I can't figure out is why she has the cable guy at the house twice a week when I'm out playing pool. Johnnyt
 
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Jerry Forsyth said:
So we made a pact that from then on she would only be concerned with my happiness and not her own and that I would only be concerned with her happiness and not my own and this 'mutual nurturing' has worked ever since.

As for pool, no problem. We both have hobbies that the other one does not care for. Mine is pool and she is a Master Gardener. So we both get some 'away' time. We also have many common interests as we grow veggies on our farm that we enjoy donating to food banks and we are both involved in local government. So we have a good mix of time together and apart. I would not want to be single again for anything in the world. I really enjoy having a life partner whom I adore.
Click to expand...

What a great post! This describes my marriage and my relationship with my wife! We've been married a little less than two years, but it is "perfect pair" situation! My wife completely supports my hobby/job/obsession with pool. She travels with me on most of my trips around the country, sometimes flying in somewhere along the way to meet up with me...other times going with me for the entire trip (we're headed to CA in a few days). She loves to shop...fortunately for me, her obsession is thrift stores! :D So I just make sure the car is packed light, so it can be "filled up" for the trip home! LOL Some friends have suggested getting a small trailer to pull behind the Caddy, but that would just encourage her MORE! :eek: (J/K dear!!!) LOL I love her immensely, and tell her so every day, several times a day! She is just learning to play, so that is a work in progress. I definitely feel like one of the lucky guys, and I truly love my life!

Scott Lee
www.poolknowledge.com
 
I must admit my wife is pretty amazing when it comes to my pool interests. She understands that when I go to buy a house that it must have room for a pool table. We have relocated 3 times in the last 5 years, and she will measure the rooms when she is house hunting when I can't make it. Most amazing though is that our Anniversary is in mid-March. ALMOST every year our anniversary falls on the same days as the Valley Forge Expo, which I have been going to for the last 10 years.

She understands it is a once a year event and has no problem with me going with my best friend to play in it and spend the weekend there. She is happy to celebrate our anniversary on a different day so that I can go to Valley Forge.

My wife is an extremely sweet person. Unfortunately, next year it will be our 20th and although she is still ok with me going to Valley Forge she is requiring me to take two weeks of vacation instead of just celebrating it over the weekend. Oh well, I know she is right...
 
WOW...Great stories guys, and I hope I don't bore anyone with mine. I met my wife through a mutual friend almost 6 years ago. I came from rags and she came from silver spoons. Our lifestyles where different where she had it all, and I plotted to get it all. I dealt drugs, drank daily, gambled, booked games, played pool, etc. you know the whole package. I did 5 years in a State Penitentiary, she was a college grad, working as a assistant manager of a upscale hair salon. I used her for 2 years off and on, to pay bills, buy me cars and do motor work to them, clothes, etc. I eventually ran her almost to a state of bankruptcy of the tune of $25K in those 2 years. We eventually split up for 6 months, till I picked up the phone one night to call her to see if she would met me at a local club. We talked and never looked backed since. I have recently passed my 1 year wedding anniversay in August and now have a beautiful 9 month baby girl to share with this WONDERFUL woman. And Im man enough to admit SHE single handily changed my life. I am now a successful business owner, Ive paid off her debt, bought US a house (with enough room in the basement for my man cave complete with mini theatre with a 116 inch screen and pool table). She HATES & LOATHES the game of billiards, but understands that I love it. She bi**ches about the SBE, but allows me to go for the last 5 years and tells me to have a good time. I radomly text her while there with the numbers 381 and only she knows what it means. I always get the same text back. I love my wife with all my soul and wouldnt trade her in for a angle on any bet. She dosent like when I gamble, but she tolerates it if the bills are current and there is money in the bank for her as well.

All in all, I pretty much have a little piece of everyones story in mine. lol

1 year down and 100 more to go!!!!!!!
 
Neil said:
I've got to say that I have one great wife. She knew I was a pool player when we married, but of course had no idea what that entailed. About 2 yrs. in, we got in a BIG fight over pool. I ended it by again telling her that I loved her more than pool (for the ten thousandth time), and then taking my cue out of the case and smashing it over the kitchen sink. I picked up the pieces and put them in the trash can, and then shouted at her- now which do you think I love more? And then walked out of the room.

For 4 days she hardly said a word to me. Then on Friday she told me to get in the car. She drove me over to Lansing, (an hour drive), Where we went to the pool room there. She walked over to the cue display and told me to pick out what cue I wanted, But I couldn't go over 300 because that was all her paycheck was for. I have had no problem since then.

All they really need is to know that they are the most important thing in your life. If I want to go play, I just tell her where I'm going. No problem. In fact, if I don't play for a week or so, she tells me to get out and go practice. She loves going to any bigger tournament I play in, but rarely goes to any of the smaller ones anymore.

I'be always wanted to make her a player too, but after 17 years, I have accepted that it is not going to happen. There are few tourn. around here, and this year (again) there is one on her birthday. Care to guess where I'm taking her for her birthday? What more could a guy ask for?
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Great story! That one belongs in a movie.
 
Maze featuring Frankie Beverly did a song a while back entitled "A woman is a wonder" if any of you here are ever fortunate enough to hear that song,you will thank the heavens above that you have that someone special in your life.

A woman is trully a wonder.
 
Walt Frazier said:
As a happily married man,I have experienced plenty of ups and downs in my life.But all in all,I am very happy and blessed to have such a wonderful wife ..

My wife and I are complete opposites .She hates to gamble .She can't stand pool .She likes coffee and I like tea(I think you catch my drift) and although I've had several girlfriends before her that loved pool and cards and gambling,but none of them could measure up to this angel of mine ..

FWIW,I realized the value of keeping and maintaining peace in my home and I love my wife and kids more than anything.I have managed to find a pretty good balance,but I would give up pool and gambling in a heartbeat if it jeopardized my family situation.

So here's the purpose of this thread :This is for all of you guys or girls out there that are married or in a serious relationship:does your wife support your love of pool/gambling?.does she enjoy the game? has there ever been a time where pool has caused arguements or fights? have you ever divorced a woman because she could not dig your lifestyle as a pool player?

Feel free to share your thoughts and experiences with your spouse as relates to pool.
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I can honestly say that my girl doesn't love the sport like I do. She likes to play, and she is damn good. She is just not obsessed like I am. (However, I met her in Korea in my barracks pool room. I was top dog in my barracks, but she came in and smacked me down 3 times in a row! That was the last time I ever underestimated a woman on the table!)

However, I know she loves me and understands the obsession. She let me turn the living room into a pool room. Then she allowed me to turn a bedroom into a Living room!

Now how is that for a great woman? She lets me play in any tournament and any city that I want to play in. Most of the time she goes with me, and now she has sort of caught the buzz in playing at some of the woman's events. She still doesn't have my obsession, but she is very good to me.

It has actually allowed me to be supportive of her obsessions, and I allowed her to have a whole room for her crafts. Easy compromise in my opinion.

Her understanding of my obsession has actually made it a lot harder for me to get mad at her for anything. LOL.
 
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Well

If anyone is an 'Expert' in this area, it is me. Why, you ask? Because I have been married 4 times to 3 women, and I have played Pool 46 years now, and I have gambled since day 1 almost.

My 1st wife knew and understood that I was a Pool player, and went with me lots of times, but did get bored some. I was a little ornery back then, and since she had a 36D-23-35 figure, I would have her wear her leather mini skirt and V shaped red top many times, and many of my opponents 'couldn't concentrate' when they played me ... LOL

My next one is the one I married twice, and I calmed down my playing, and mostly just played league. She didn't play, and we had to have an agreement on limited playing times. I made a mistake once, and gambled playing for 16 hours straight one time, and she didn't understand why I couldn't talk on the phone to her, since it caused me to get emotional.

The last one was a rebound marriage of a few months, and I went to Vegas 3 weeks after being married, and did not take her because of her job, and because she affected me emotionally a lot also, which wasn't good for a serious tournament. That is the year I placed 9th in singles 8 ball with over a 1,000 entries. (VNEA).

All of them had a tendency to believe that you weren't being entirely honest with them when playing, and they believed women hung around Pool Players, and lets just say their trust was less than 100%. Although,
I was strictly a money player looking to make money, and not out for any eye candy stuff. They all believed the women that hung out in Bars or Pool rooms either were less than stellar reputations, which was usually right. None of them understood the difference between someone that plays Pool, and being a 'Player'. They all had a tendency to think of Pool as a game, and not a sport.

None of my divorces were due to the fact of me being a 'Player', but due to other marriage issues. I always tried to put my marriages first, and keep Pool separate, but I did slip a couple of times. I have been single for 17 years now, and don't have any problems associated with Pool now, and any girlfriends I have seem to understand much better than wives do.

None of my wives, or girlfriends either, had any real interest in Pool, except 1 girlfriend,and she wasn't bad, but didn't want lessons, or to pursue it any more than she did.

Your family should come first, but they also have to understand that your Passion for Pool is in your blood, and rarely ever goes away.

And just for background info, I have a couple of college degrees, and was always employed as a white collar employee during those times.
 
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Being married has definitely cooled off my pool game. It is harder to get out to play. Now that we have moved to Florida and the stress is not as bad things have gotten better. I would still like to play more but it has gotten better.
 
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