Its Monday: An Extemporanious Piece

Mr. Bond

Mr. Bond

Orbis Non Sufficit
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I got up this morning and felt pretty good actually..as opposed to being achey from this or that...

Made some coffee.... Mmmmm coffee.

Found myself walking past my sexy [pool] table, so I goosed her in the ribs as I passed by...and said "maybe later babe.."

But then she whispered in my in ear and said ...come play with me ...just one little rack....pretty please... and she winked...

FINE...just one little rack.....I gave in...

Turned on some music...racked up a tight one...and man it was tight, I even impressed myself...I was full of confidence and caffiene...

Oh damn...now one of my favorite songs came on...I had to turn it up...

The house is just thumpin...I've magically become a hybrid: My new name is Mosconi Cruise...and I'm cooler than cool, badder than bad....

I slowly bend down to line up my break shot....the tension [in my mind] is building because now I'm in super-fly-ninja mode, about to hit this cue ball so hard that my cue is going to splinter....

Swooosh!! I let er rip.......the cue ball breaks the sound barrier on the way to the rack....I am pool god unleashed....

Balls explode in every direction...

But then......


The cue ball decides that it cannot be constrained to this solar system, and thus launches itself straight up from the table....

Not having previously attained flight clearance, this was a problem...

For parked right above the table, is my nice big fat flourescent light fixture.

Cue ball went all honey-badger, and did not care whether my light fixture was in the way, it wanted out of the building...

*terrible crashing sound*

*darkness ensues*


So, I'm standing there in the dark, a crappy song comes on, and my coffee cup is filled with glass shards.


$^%@!
 
fowl:
one-pearl-guinea-fowl-keet.jpg
 
Very nice, Mr. B.
Descriptive and imaginative, with a subtle dab of sensuality, and a bit of tragedy at the end. :smile:
 
Last edited:
A joy to read. Thanks!

And a good argument for the diamond table light with the tubes covered & protected.
 
Great read ! :thumbup:

MosconiCruise : been there, done that. (not the breakage part).
Good to see you have a sense of humor towards it. (If you didn't, you would not have posted this!)

P.S.
You got a dam sexxy pool table !
 
Mr. Bond said:
I got up this morning and felt pretty good actually..as opposed to being achey from this or that...

Made some coffee.... Mmmmm coffee.

Found myself walking past my sexy [pool] table, so I goosed her in the ribs as I passed by...and said "maybe later babe.."

But then she whispered in my in ear and said ...come play with me ...just one little rack....pretty please... and she winked...

FINE...just one little rack.....I gave in...

Turned on some music...racked up a tight one...and man it was tight, I even impressed myself...I was full of confidence and caffiene...

Oh damn...now one of my favorite songs came on...I had to turn it up...

The house is just thumpin...I've magically become a hybrid: My new name is Mosconi Cruise...and I'm cooler than cool, badder than bad....

I slowly bend down to line up my break shot....the tension [in my mind] is building because now I'm in super-fly-ninja mode, about to hit this cue ball so hard that my cue is going to splinter....

Swooosh!! I let er rip.......the cue ball breaks the sound barrier on the way to the rack....I am pool god unleashed....

Balls explode in every direction...

But then......


The cue ball decides that it cannot be constrained to this solar system, and thus launches itself straight up from the table....

Not having previously attained flight clearance, this was a problem...

For parked right above the table, is my nice big fat flourescent light fixture.

Cue ball went all honey-badger, and did not care whether my light fixture was in the way, it wanted out of the building...

*terrible crashing sound*

*darkness ensues*


So, I'm standing there in the dark, a crappy song comes on, and my coffee cup is filled with glass shards.


$^%@!
Click to expand...

Nicely written, Mr. Bond. :thumbup2:

I did not know that you were a wordsmith.
 
Solution - balls with a metal core and a powerful magnet underneath the table surface. Balls would never leave the table.
 
Mr. Bond said:
I got up this morning and felt pretty good actually..as opposed to being achey from this or that...

Made some coffee.... Mmmmm coffee.

Found myself walking past my sexy [pool] table, so I goosed her in the ribs as I passed by...and said "maybe later babe.."

But then she whispered in my in ear and said ...come play with me ...just one little rack....pretty please... and she winked...

FINE...just one little rack.....I gave in...

Turned on some music...racked up a tight one...and man it was tight, I even impressed myself...I was full of confidence and caffiene...

Oh damn...now one of my favorite songs came on...I had to turn it up...

The house is just thumpin...I've magically become a hybrid: My new name is Mosconi Cruise...and I'm cooler than cool, badder than bad....

I slowly bend down to line up my break shot....the tension [in my mind] is building because now I'm in super-fly-ninja mode, about to hit this cue ball so hard that my cue is going to splinter....

Swooosh!! I let er rip.......the cue ball breaks the sound barrier on the way to the rack....I am pool god unleashed....

Balls explode in every direction...

But then......


The cue ball decides that it cannot be constrained to this solar system, and thus launches itself straight up from the table....

Not having previously attained flight clearance, this was a problem...

For parked right above the table, is my nice big fat flourescent light fixture.

Cue ball went all honey-badger, and did not care whether my light fixture was in the way, it wanted out of the building...

*terrible crashing sound*

*darkness ensues*


So, I'm standing there in the dark, a crappy song comes on, and my coffee cup is filled with glass shards.


$^%@!
Click to expand...

I think this one needs to be posted again.
 
I LOL'd so much at this thread for so many reasons....but at the end, this thread solidified why I'll never have a big light over my table....I too have had to clean glass, phosphorus, and mercury off table cloth, it aint fun!. Recessed and track with LED floods for the win!! :D

Great telling though! ;)
 
We're ready for a another one, Mr Bond.

...it doesn't have to be complete...
...we'll settle for .007 of a post.
 
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