i think that lightining the load of all the bs and extra hassel with trying to keep work and pleasure might be weighing you down....sounds like your trying to lighten your load and hopefully it will my your back fill better....life is tuff and sometimes it is hard to carry the "load" good luck i hope all works out....i dont care what you have done in the past...and money is only money....like many have said easy come easy go....the only thing i care about is life and making it stay....gl mickey